Chores

David49

I have no problem doing things that needed doing cleaning, washing, cooking, now retired I have time so why not. However it's a very relaxed routine, my wife is not an ardent house keeper so I do it when I think it needs doing.

I do most of the food shopping too, in the end it's about equal, we are both happy with the routine.

That sounds perfect and very similar to our house.

The only comment I’d make is that your DH does the ‘accounting’: no problem at all if you feel au fait with the bill paying, banking, investments, holiday planning etc. But don’t be like some women I know, all at sea with financial matters should DH pass away. Dusting doesn’t matter but banking does!

I do the lot now (and have done for the last 40 years). DH has never done his fair share. As newlyweds we sat down and divided a list of regular tasks, allocating times, level of difficult (e.g. high up) and whether they were pleasant or not. It became obvious around Week 3 that it would never work. One example was the bathroom (fully tiled, bath, window and basin - the loo was a separate room) which was his choice. We scored it 10 points.. While he was doing that I started downstairs on the kitchen (25 points) and having finished that started on the living room (15 points including patio doors and an open fire). He was still only halfway through the bathroom! Top that with the fact that I had to re-do the bathroom cos he missed a lot. After much argument it was clear that he was never going to do his share - and never has! Now we are in a 5-bed house and I do the lot, inside and out, and have always done the finances, holiday planning, Christmas stuff etc. He has shared cooking but soooooo slooooowly.

I believe he has ADHD but he will not consider the idea as he says it is an insult.

Faxgran

The only comment I’d make is that your DH does the ‘accounting’: no problem at all if you feel au fait with the bill paying, banking, investments, holiday planning etc. But don’t be like some women I know, all at sea with financial matters should DH pass away. Dusting doesn’t matter but banking does!

I was chatting to a lovely lady at U3A whose husband died a few weeks ago. She's doing well but did confess she didn't know how to record any programmes on the TV or how to access iPlayer. She is in her late 80s but very with it so I was surprised.

My DH does the blue chores , diy, heavy work in the garden . He does hoover and do the dishwasher . We have a dog , so the downstairs needs hoovering daily .
I do the general cleaning . I clean when the house needs it , I don’t have a schedule.
Both of us do the home admin as I feel it’s important for both of us to know the finances.
But we’re all different and if your dh wants a list or schedule, go for it.

We have been retired for several years. I always make breakfast, oh makes lunch and we take it in turns to cook dinner, although sometimes I do it a couple of nights running and he does it another couple of nights. We both put washing on/hang on the line. OH usually loads dishwasher and I empty. OH cleans bathrooms one week and me the next week. We go food shopping together as we both enjoy doing it. Definitely don’t want schedules, spent too many years at work following them.

I have always been the practical one home and garden as well as working. My DH ran our business full time I worked with him part time. Since we retired I will suggest jobs my DH could help with to keep him occupied.
I would not under any circumstances be given a schedule or timetable at all. Matriarchal is me and I am not going to change any day soon.

Slimswim

We have been retired for several years. I always make breakfast, oh makes lunch and we take it in turns to cook dinner, although sometimes I do it a couple of nights running and he does it another couple of nights. We both put washing on/hang on the line. OH usually loads dishwasher and I empty. OH cleans bathrooms one week and me the next week. We go food shopping together as we both enjoy doing it. Definitely don’t want schedules, spent too many years at work following them.

We do NOT go shopping together we are incompatible in the aisle I have a list and stick to it, to OH shopping is an art form, left to her it would be scratch meals every day. I make sure the fridge and freezer are properly stocked.