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Shopping with hubby

(109 Posts)
Flutterby1 Tue 15-Oct-19 18:56:33

Now I don’t want to sound like a nagging, ungrateful wife but I have a huge problem shopping with my hubby. I really can’t stand it. He always wants to come with me and I end up not buying anything as hate that he is standing about with me. It’s not that he is doing anything he is just there. If we split up for a while I am constantly looking at the time to make sure I get back to meet him where arranged.
Now that Xmas shopping time is here he has started asking ‘do you want to go shopping’ aaagh.
Suggestions please.

Nanny27 Wed 16-Oct-19 11:22:50

I also assumed the Op was in the US kittylester from the word 'mall'. Not a term I thought we used in UK but have since noticed someone else upthread says it.

Blossomsmum Wed 16-Oct-19 11:27:31

I have found a solution !
We live near a small market town and I don’t drive so got to let the old git drive me there .
2 hours is plenty of time for me to do the bits I need to do so while I do my thing he goes swimming , steam room etc and has a good gossip with the other old gits he meets there .
The pool is in the middle of town and has a cafe so if I finish early I go there for a coffee .
For big town shopping I stick him in a costa with his iPad while I get on with it and we are both happy .

Purpledaffodil Wed 16-Oct-19 11:30:04

Mall seems to be a common UK term now describing those big mainly indoor collections of shops.
Mine likes the idea of shopping but has no stamina. Therefore I leave him to linger over his cup of tea while I head off. Sadly he can no longer read (aphasia following strokes) but has a lot of music to listen to on his iPod. We meet later at a bench somewhere preselected and I take him directly to whatever if I need a second opinion. He is much more tolerant of time I take than he used to be?

Beckett Wed 16-Oct-19 11:31:51

If my DH wanted to come shopping with me (very rarely) I would leave him in the nearest cafe with a newspaper whilst I toured the stores.

I'm another who hates the word "hubby" - so twee and outdated, reminds me of the time when men referred to their wives as "the little woman"!

whywhywhy Wed 16-Oct-19 11:35:32

I am just the same and I HATE shopping with hubby but fortunately I have my own car. On the occasions when he asks to come along I usually say that I want some ME time which he accepts but then I feel guilty when he puts that little boy lost look on. I love my own space and maybe should be a hermit! Can you ask a friend to come along with you and maybe give her money for the fuel, if she drives? Or arrange to meet a friend somewhere and get him to drop you off there, saying that you will get a taxi back? Arghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! It drives me wild! x

Dottydots Wed 16-Oct-19 11:39:53

My boyfriend is happy to go grocery shopping with me. However he draws the line at browsing and clothes shopping, which suits me as I prefer to look around on my own, anyway. On my lone outings I also usually get the added bonus of a £20 note from him to "spoil myself." As they say, "every little helps."

maddyone Wed 16-Oct-19 11:43:16

I very rarely shop with my husband, but I do have my own car, so that makes things easier. I take my very elderly mother (nearly 92) shopping most weeks, but that’s just for food and household necessities. I do very little clothes shopping these days, but often buy online if I do want something. But tomorrow I’m taking Mum to the big M+S for a pre Christmas shop, she’s taking her walker which has a seat, so we’ll see how we get on. I do go shopping with my husband for anything to do with the house such as furniture, and I shop with him if we want to change either of the cars, although after we’ve looked, he often looks online and can buy the same car cheaper elsewhere.

Paperbackwriter Wed 16-Oct-19 11:45:08

I'm constantly amazed at women who can't get themselves to the shops under their own steam. However will they cope if alone? Do you have no buses in your area (which I do sympathise with when in deepest Cornwall)? Or a taxi company? Is it not possible to learn to drive? I can't stand the idea of shopping with anyone at all, let alone my husband. It's just too much hassle.

Daisymae Wed 16-Oct-19 12:05:08

Do the bulk of your shopping online. Get a few bit and pieces when you are together then have a good lunch. Simples! X

sarahellenwhitney Wed 16-Oct-19 12:10:33

Flutterby
Learn to drive /get the bus/taxi.
Not joined at the hipgrin ?

Rufus2 Wed 16-Oct-19 12:15:27

Now I don’t want to sound like a nagging, ungrateful wife (but)
Flutterby; I've filed your remark along with; " I'm not a prude, but" and "I'm not a sexist, but" who go on to demonstrate that is exactly what they are! grin
Of course, it will be claimed that all this denigration of hubbies is designed to be funny, and I hope it is, but I can think of much funnier ways of wasting thread space.
Solo shopping is not difficult; if it was I'd go in for home delivery. hmm
OoRoo

Bathsheba Wed 16-Oct-19 12:22:37

Flutterby I don't understand why you have your husband go shopping with you if you don't want him there. Tell him! Take a cab, or go with a friend, anything as long as you get him to understand that going shopping with you is strictly off limits!

Magpie why on earth do you put up with it? You say your husband "won't go anywhere on his own". Well you become a person who "won't go shopping with him". Why does his dislike of going out on his own have to impact on your life? That's a problem for him, not you, and one that he should find a solution to that doesn't involve you having to grit your teeth for 2 or 3 hours. Seriously, just say no!

mrsgreenfingers56 Wed 16-Oct-19 12:30:21

Can't stand shopping with my husband either, we usually end up having a domestic! Just easier to do it on my own to be honest. Had to laugh at some of the posts, as can really relate to them. Go on your own ladies!

Anthea1948 Wed 16-Oct-19 12:42:44

I don't go shopping much but when I do I choose to go with my daughter; if DH comes I feel like you do, that I need to hurry because he's waiting (not that he ever complains, it's just that he's there). Probably your best bet is to tell him how you feel - it's nothing against him personally, it's just that you feel more relaxed if you don't feel he's there waiting.

Larsonsmum Wed 16-Oct-19 12:53:48

I can't stand shopping with anyone else!! Not my husband, not my daughter, not friends, and definitely not my late Mum, so I am more than happy to ALWAYS shop alone. Find away to go alone.

Larsonsmum Wed 16-Oct-19 12:55:18

* a way*

Chinesecrested Wed 16-Oct-19 12:55:22

We just split up and meet for lunch. He goes to man shops, clothes, electricals, TVs and computers.

lemongrove Wed 16-Oct-19 12:58:01

I agree with those who say that DH’s should be left at home ( preferably doing something useful)? or taken to Sainsbury or supermarket of choice and put in the creche ( the cafe, with a newspaper.)It works for me.

TrendyNannie6 Wed 16-Oct-19 13:01:01

I go shopping on my own or with friend I wouldn’t take mine with me : he’d say everything looks great come on let’s go in the first ten mins lol

icanhandthemback Wed 16-Oct-19 13:05:37

I can't understand the horror of a husband accompanying you shopping. It used to be hell when mine smoked because he would get to a certain point and then insist on leaving for a cigarette. Nowadays, I've learned just to shop as I want to and he will eventually take himself off if he is not interested in accompanying me any more. Until then, I value his opinion if it is clothes shopping and enjoy his company whilst shopping for anything else. I can't imagine being irritated by his presence but I do enjoy shopping on my own occasionally.

Nanny41 Wed 16-Oct-19 13:11:28

We both enjoy shopping, but seperate when we get to the mall, he takes ages,I am quick, but like to wander even if I know what I want, annoyingly my Husband rings me when he has finished and wants to go home, he has to wait!

DoraMarr Wed 16-Oct-19 13:18:02

Hubby? Are we in the 1950s?

Lilyflower Wed 16-Oct-19 13:21:11

My DH and I used to love to go shopping together but then he decided it was not for him. Despite this, he always wants to come when I (very rarely) go. He is only interested in things for him (shirts, wine, cheese etc.) and acts as if he is pained and bored if I am am looking for something for us, the house or myself. It's like taking a seven year old out. If I do get something for myself he then starts looking to do some 'revenge spending' so everything costs more than twice the price. Most frustrating.

Newatthis Wed 16-Oct-19 13:21:22

GrandmaKT - was it that your husband didn't want to go shopping or didn't want to go shopping in 'Liverpool' when he said - "I'd rather cut off both my arms and legs". Liverpool is an amazing city to visit with a fabulous shopping centre, museums, art galleries (including the Tate Modern) and a beautiful waterfront, not forgetting the warmth and friendliness of the people there, so he wouldn't get bored as there would be so much for him to see.

omega1 Wed 16-Oct-19 13:23:55

My hubby is a shopoholic he loves it whether it is for me, for him, just grocery shopping so its a pleasure to go shopping with him because he wants me to buy everything.