Back to a routine

Being totally free now, I often make a plan but don't stick to it.
Nevertheless, I do like making plans, and writing lists.
If I can just achieve some of the plans, or the lists, I'm happy with that.

I read your post. Bless you darling, it's hard. Just go out for a walk, People are generally kind and will talk in passing. I'm divorced and have a disabled son, I take care of him. But I find it lonely still. I have a dog I walk, other dog walkers stop and talk which is nice. You have to try and make an effort if you are brave enough, I'm not being unkind, just found through experience this helps. Lots of love and good wishes.

I am not retired (80 in April) but, as a self-employed freelance writer, I am free to organise my work. I write most mornings but have the flexibility to visit a sick friend or go for a walk if that's what I want to do. Since I'm currently writing a historical novel a lot of time is spent locating sources and doing research. As long as I meet deadlines, it doesn't matter. My target for January is another 10,000 words but I also have to write a power point prsentation on a different subject and prepare three proposals plus samples for an editor who is interested in my ideas.

So I have to have some sort of schedule/routine or I'd just spend my time scrolling through Facebook, which I can assure you I do plentry of! A blank day holds no appeal for me.

grandMattie

I agree. Now widowed, if I don’t go out, I could spend days without seeing/speaking to a soul. I still often spend 48 hours silent.

This certainly applies to me too.

I have a reading group, some volunteering and country dancing once a week, and am looking for more activities,

These are hard to find in a small country town, but necessary, as I too am alone and find that on the blank days in my calendar I only speak briefly to the person on the supermarket cash-desk!

You put me to shame, GrammarGrandma, I obviously need deadlines and something worthwhile to do. Still looking for that, and feel somewhat ashamed at being of so little use.

I have a diary and usually fill it up with possible activities (U3A, art, visits) but they are very fluid if I don't feel like doing them
and prefer to stay at home then I do.. it's wonderful to have those possibilities..

Sunday Church, Monday my husband's books and balances, Tuesday to Saturday whatever suits, including daily meals for my husband's workers. Four dog walks daily, some ad hoc child care.

Laundry most days, bread daily, continuous cooking and washing up.

I like a mixture . I have two mornings a week with something structured and sometimes two evenings. That's enough for me. I also have one other morning I can go to if I feel like it.

I am lucky enough to be able to travel quite a bit, in fact I am off soon for a three month trip. My partner and I frequently go away for anything from a few days to a few weeks and, as much as I love our lifestyle, I am very happy when I know I have a settled time at home and so I can get into a routine, join a class, maybe get some jobs done around the house, or regularly meet a friend for a swim or a walk. I’m an ex teacher and I do still plan out the days and weeks, otherwise nothing would get done.

The period between Christmas and New Year is an eternity for me. All my usual activities don’t start up again next week and I’ve had altogether too much time on my hands. Too much “thinking time”. Normally my only free weekday is Monday. So, yes, bring on the routine; let’s get back to whatever passes for normal!

I like a mix, some days with regular commitments and some days a blank canvas

Personally, I don’t like having a fixed routine and prefer to take the days as they come.

I’m also a widow (how I dislike that title 😢) but have always been introverted so being at home is my happy place. Yes, I feel lonely at times but that’s nothing to do with being alone. I can feel lonely surrounded by people.

I’m happy to be able to care for my twin grandsons when required, they are the tonic that keeps me going. I also have some lovely friends to meet up with for coffee every so often and am glad I am free to do what I want with no pressure.

I used to think that I was rather disorganised not like my parents !
Now I realise that I prefer to plan my days and get up in a leisurely fashion .
It doesn't matter if I'm .having a quiet day at home or going out .
One of my friends forgets to get essential shopping and knocks on my door to borrow things or makes us very late for everything . We miss the beginning of films ,other friends are irritated as they don't want to wait for an hour and on the way to or from a destination-there's a massive detour to either deliver or pick up something and that goes wrong as well as the address is incorrect .
The radio is always on at a deafening volume and she's always on the phone talking loudly.
I could never go on holiday with her .
Every day is total chaos .
Perhaps, I'm just naturally quiet .
I know that I had a tendency to be introverted as a child .
I plan my week to include activities that I enjoy , but sometimes do things on the off chance .

Esmay

I used to think that I was rather disorganised not like my parents !
Now I realise that I prefer to plan my days and get up in a leisurely fashion .
It doesn't matter if I'm .having a quiet day at home or going out .
One of my friends forgets to get essential shopping and knocks on my door to borrow things or makes us very late for everything . We miss the beginning of films ,other friends are irritated as they don't want to wait for an hour and on the way to or from a destination-there's a massive detour to either deliver or pick up something and that goes wrong as well as the address is incorrect .
The radio is always on at a deafening volume and she's always on the phone talking loudly.
I could never go on holiday with her .
Every day is total chaos .
Perhaps, I'm just naturally quiet .
I know that I had a tendency to be introverted as a child .
I plan my week to include activities that I enjoy , but sometimes do things on the off chance .

You sound like an amazing friend Esmay, I hope she appreciates you..

I was back to my 'routine' the day after boxing day. I still work albeit part-time but still 30 hours a week. I can retire in March this year. I doubt very much whether I will retire as I find that if I stay at home, the less I do the less I want to do.

Hi Pascal
I'm a good friend , who will do anything for anyone , but I can get fed up !
I hate missing chunks of films or going on Magical Mystery tours on the way to some occasion or on the way home .
It's actually difficult to tell a friend that you hate her being so late and disorganised without it turning into a row .
One of this friend's long term friends has been complaining about her for nearly three years .
It doesn't seem to make any difference though they no longer go on holiday together !

My highly disorganised friend reminds me of another lady , who was similar.
They both have been sacked for incompetence and poor time keeping .
I used to find her exhausting as well .
I've wondered about it and I've come to a conclusion :
They are rather alike in some ways.
Neither of them could /can stand being at home or silence .
The old friend was widowed at at early age and deeply traumatised from an earlier abusive relationship .
The other friend has been deeply unhappy with her morose husband and her life is made miserable by the behaviour of one of her daughters .
I can only describe the girl as vile -disrespectful , rude, hypercritical and it's getting worse .
She walked out on Christmas Day .
I guess that I would fill up my days with endless exhausting activities to blot the reality of my life out .

I like to have my set activities every week, then fit in other extra stuff around them.
Yoga on Monday
Well-being walk on Tuesday
Well-being cafe on Wednesday
Supermarket delivery on Thursday
Three dance classes on Friday
At live rugby match Saturday or Sunday; or if no rugby will often go to the cinema.
Monthly book club
Bi-monthly ladies wine club
Occasional coffee mornings with friends or neighbours.
Shopping trips to nearby towns.

Keeps me fit, I have company and a structure to my week. Otherwise I would sit at home and see no-one.