Feeling depressed

You do sound overwhelmed. Is there anything you can constructively do or is it a matter of waiting for it all coming out in the wash?

Maybe try writing it all down - that can sometimes sort of empty your brain if it for a while and stop the thoughts from around.

Should have previewed!

...empty your brain of it for a while and stop the thoughts from swirling around.

I feel your pain travelsafar. I too have been in your position more than once. Suffice to say there is light at the end of the long dark tunnel. Without going into too much detail it took time, talking things through with someone I could trust and ,in my case, anti-depressants.
I do hope you can find a way to make life more bearable .

It really does sound as though you just have too much on your plate just now - too much to worry about - too much for one brain to deal with.

Is there someone a bit apart from the situation whom you might be able to talk to? If not, then looking for a private counselor might help - someone to open up to and get an outside view.

If you truly feel that this is depression, then the GP is the way to go.

Please look after yourself.

Don't know if this will help but if I feel like that about my particular worrying situation I say to myself "I mustn't think about that now, I will think about it while I am in the shower" Then I actually do allow myself to think about it when I am in the shower, and I can cry without anyone knowing.

Travelsafar I do feel for you as I have been overwhelmed recently with my DS's awful divorce and the effect on my two grandsons. I got to the point of sobbing on most days.

I eventually went to my GP and I am so pleased I did she recommended me to the local Mental Health Group and I was receiving help within days. I am having something called CBT cognitive behaviour therapy for anxiety and stress. This may be just what will help you settle down and see things from a different angle.

There are always the Samaritans. There is help out there you just have to ask for it. Mental Health is pretty high on the agenda now.

Very best of luck.

I am so very sorry, do seek support and you are not a coward, I have been in despair for quite some time, take things one day at a time , you will come through this X

Yes travels I have felt like this at times with all our family’s
Ill health, there is just so much of it.
I help them in a practical way, including a sympathetic ear,
But now just can’t let it get to me, so refuse to constantly think about things I cannot change.It’s not doing me or them any good, so I have mentally ‘let it go’ and feel better as a result.I don’t think too far ahead now, and have accepted that what will be, will be.
I do hope you will find a way to do the same.

Thank you everyone for words of support. I think i was having a 'bit of blip' yesterday over everything due to feeling tired after not sleeping well for a few nights due to the heat. As we all know, tiredness affects us mentally, physcially and emtionally. Feeling brighter today .

My family life is quite frankly a car crash.
If I allowed myself to dwell on it as I did in the earlier days I would not be here now. Just allow yourself to think about it for a few minutes a day, never at night if you can get away with that, but then get on with the things you can control and do not allow the bad things to ruin your life.
They will if you let them, don't let this happen.

I am sure I am stating the obvious when I say there is a huge diffference between depression caused by going through dreadful trials in one’s life when the system just says “Stop, I can take no more!” and the depression that rolls in like sudden fog without warning on a previously clear day and you find yourself grinding to a halt or weeping copiously while thinking “But I don’t know why I feel so depressed”.
It may be possible to address some of the root causes which grind us down or to alleviate their effect but the bottom line is supporting us to cope. Nobody should have to cope alone - others may not be able to take the problem away, but can help you to feel you are not alone in how you feel.
There is a place for counselling, for therapy, for offloading e.g.to Samaritans ( and no, you do not need to feel suicidal) and in some cases for medication, whether to help you sleep or reduce anxiety attacks.
Nobody expects you to cope unsupported after an injury, to walk without crutches after a broken leg, so nobody should need to face depression for whatever reason, unsupported.
Do please talk it through, possibly your GP is your first port of call, but Samaritans will not commit you to medication or indeed any course of action.
It does help to talk.

Glad to hear that you are feeling a bit brighter today.

travelsafar
I was in a right mess just before Christmas. I kept hanging on and eventually took the Citalapam option. I am feeling much better now.
If you feel really bad do not ignore it . Go to the doctor for help.
There seems to be something in our family genes that gets us . Me, my mum and my sister. My grandmother had this as well . There seems to be a family tendency to get into a really low mood every so often. All except my dad who was always positive.
Nothing really seriously depressed but leaving me very low in mood .
A top up of serotonin is basically what I take.
Taking citalopram this time the side effects were dreadful But I had got myself very low. I weathered it through and began to feel a lot better.

I would be I interested to know how my body chemistry works like this.

Sending you my love travel x

and best wishes from me and glad you are feeling a bit better today.

I’m glad to hear that you are feeling brighter today travelsafar. It’s good to be able to come on here for support and to offload ones feelings a bit. Lots of good advice already given to which I can’t really add anything different other than to keep on posting and agree that eventually, the light at the end of the tunnel appears! Take care. ?

I’d like to add, you are not a coward. Our feelings can overwhelm us at times but that does not mean we are weak or cowardly. Quite the opposite. ?

Glad you are feeling better today travelsafar . I feel like this most of the time. Life is not easy, that's for sure.

That is so sad. I hope some of your issues get resilved soon. I think it's good to come on Gransnet and discuss them. It sort of unpacks them from your head.

travelsafar this could be me talking for much of the past 7 years. The worst thing is lying awake at night achieving nothing but worrying and then feeling like s* the whole next day.
When I did CBT, one simple strategy we were taught was to make a list of small, easily picked-up things you can do when you are feeling low which you know help you feel a bit more looked-after. I did a lot of sewing at one stage which helped me feel I was being creative as well but in my CBT group we had really simple things on our lists like taking a bath, putting on scent, looking at flowers. Try to do something that makes you feel better every day.

MawBroon, fabulous answer.

travalsafar - without delay visit your GP and ask for counselling on the NHS - you should be eligible for anything between 6-12 weeks talking therapy with a skilled professional who will have heard it all before and help you to offload your worries and anxieties. You are coping with multiple concerns and probably just need to get everything in perspective - no need for any kind of medication, just some confidential talking with a good listener.

Glad you are feeling a bit better today.

I would like to make a few observations for anyone feeling depressed based upon what I have read above.

Those who fortunately have never been clinically depressed can suggest that you don't think about it or think about it at certain times but, for the clinically depressed, it is not possible to stop the bad thoughts coming into your head. If only it was.

Talking about it is good, if you have the right person to talk to, but it is not always possible to find that person. Some live in areas where the NHS has appropriate talking therapies but many of us live in areas where such therapy is not available or, if it is, there is a very long waiting list.

There really are no simple answers to this problem but, if it persists, it is important to talk to your GP and you may have to go back a few times before the GP is convinced you are not just having a short difficult time. It must be very hard for a GP to know how serious a problem someone has on just one visit.

Travels - my GP once said to me you can worry a lot or a little about a situation, it will not affect the outcome. I have kept this in mind over the last few difficult years, and I just take one day at a time. I wish you well.