Why do we do and say nothing - is it a "British" thing?

That does sound bad on the face of it. But you say yourself you didn't see the whole incident and have no way of knowing whether the account of the woman who spoke to you was correct. The shouting could well have been a one off after a very stressful flight. Nobody's perfect.

I remember having to dump my shopping bags on the pavement to wrestle a screaming, sobbing, kicking two year old off the floor and haul him under my arm along the street under the icy scrutiny of a disapproving woman who stood still to glare at me. Two minutes later he was happily settled in front of a Thomas the Tank Engine video as if nothing had happened.

My daughter and I witnessed a woman slap her child so hard he fell down. We reported the incident but were told there was nothing that could be done as there was no evidence. We did not intervene (neither did anyone else in a busy area of Ikea) and I regret it to this day. I wish at least I'd run across to pick the child up.

I once walked away from a screaming daughter into the next aisle. her sister got worried we would loose her until I pointed out everyone in the shop knew exactly where she was!! The one screaming must have heard as she soon stopped and came looking for us.

calling him a "little jerk" (he sounded American)

Could have been Canadian!

quee27 Your grandson or your son should pay for the damage. If your grandson is not working then your son should pay for it he is responsible for him. Maybe your grandson got the keys from your son's house if presumably he has a key to your house, and I can't believe he is washing his hands of the situation.

i think it's unfortunate when someone posts a totally different problem within a thread as it all gets jumbled up with who is answering what
Wouldn't it have been better to start your own thread Quee?

I would advise walking away too. When the child understands that it cannot manipulate you it will soon stop crying. You have to show them you are in charge not them. I do not like what this man did though. Totally wrong. Very sad to treat a 4yr old like that.

I was also put in a similar situation. Walking out of a pre-school building this woman was tugging a little girl who was crying and sobbing. She had forgotten her doll. Her Mother said 'That will teach you not to forget your things. She can stay in the dark all night!'. So cruel I thought but of course I just glared and didn't do a thing about it. Coward that I am.

If a father can behave so abusively towards a four year old in public, what happens at home, or out of sight?

Is it still possible to make a citizens arrest? It that something we could do and then ring the police to report it? I know we would take person risks doing so.

My partner tells a similar story of shopping with his youngest. He walked away , and she was surrounded by women trying to stop her tantrum. As soon as she realised Dad wasn't in the group, she stopped and went after him.