opting out from having a funeral.

The important thing about this is to make sure the person leaves full instruction about what he or she wants after discussions with loved ones. Hopefully the feelings of the loved ones will be included so all should be content.

I'm with you jinglbells frocks.

We had a humanist, non religious funeral for my uncle. It was very very personal. Allowed people to say their goodbyes. Much more true and beautiful than any religious funeral I have been to.

my mother arranged for her body to used for medical research and I had to sign a form to say I agreed. Years later, when she died, I found that was lots more paperwork for me to deal with, but I wanted to honor her wishes. Various organisations were involved, but they were all closed at the weekend and the body had to be received by the medical school within 4 days of the death which meant by Tuesday. I managed it all, but now I know that if you want to do this it's best not to die on a Thursday...sorry if that sounds too flippant.

When my dad died we had a church service and her was buried in the local cemetery. We then went back to my mams for a cuppa. There were only a few family members and a couple of his friends that attended. When my mam died we had a church service and she was cremated. Only a few family members attended and we went to my brother's for a cuppa after. Her ashes were later buried with my dad. We only had church services because they were old fashioned people and wanted it as they said to be done right. When my time comes my kids feel the same as me about death, when your time is up its up and the living move on, no point mourning for something that's not there, it's just a decaying shell, the essence that made the person has moved on. I shall be cremated and scattered over the sea, there will be no church service or cremation service and no wake. Life is for the living not the dead. Of course people grieve, I grieved for my parents but I didn't need a party, church service or anything, none of us did. It's just a money making racket, everyone dies and by eck there's a lot of money to be made on death. But these are just my opinions, each to their own.

Funerals are for the living. Therefore I will consult my DSs and DGCs before stating any preferences. I know that they will agree to a secular funeral and no frills. A woodland burial would be preferable, but as I won't be there to take part, they might want to make other arrangements. I'd like to think they would have a good 'wake' and remember the happy times.

Errr... you can actually "opt out of having a funeral", as a funeral is the ceremony attached to your demise. What you can't opt out of is the disposal of your body, whether it be by interment, cremation, or donation to medical science. Personally, I'm not planning to be at my own funeral, but would be content for it to go ahead purely on the basis of allowing family and friends to say cheerio. It would seem rather rude and selfish to deny them that opportunity.

I have donated my body to science. The document is kept with my will so that they know what to do. They keep the body for 3 years and after that the family can have the body back if they want, or its dealt with by University hospital. Then a picture of you is put in a 'hall of fame' how good is that !!! I must choose a good pic, I want to look my best. My family were all for it.

Since so many people are being cremated these days that means that time can pass before the funeral takes place and lot of people just have close family who meet at the cemetry or wherever the ashes will have their last resting place.
I think thats preferable. DH and I don't want a funeral.