What do you call your vulva?

I have thought long and hard, and I have decided not to start a corresponding thread for male Gransnetters.

Spoilsport

Spoilsport indeed - I am deeply disappointed

One if you could start one substituting "his" for "your". Could be very enlightening.

Correct anatomical name with medics, Fanny to close friends and family, never you mind what I call it with DH.

When I am bathing my young grandchildren I talk about washing those little personal places with a view to it leading to talks later about their bodies are their own private property and no one else has the right to say what happens to it.

of.... not if.....

Dare you grumppa!

Grumpa
Blackcountry:- Willy, Fred,one eyed snake, that pesky thing (from a female!) just a few!

I suppose we have all heard the story of the man who went to the GP because he was concerned about his father's failing health.

Patient - I am here about the old man - he is getting feeble and infirm, has trouble getting up in the morning, has to have a rest after any exertion, and as for his appetite - he has no interest at all. I took him out to the shops yesterday and the girl at the checkout was quite distressed at his appearance - he looks so old and wrinkled compared to just a few years ago. The barber says he feels guilty at taking his money, there is so little hair left to cut. What can I do about him, doctor?

Doctor - Don't worry about it, I see many similar cases, and no need to be embarrassed about discussing it with me. Just drop your trousers and lie on the couch and I'll take a look. We'll soon have your old man feeling perky again. . .

That must be an old joke or the punchline would be:

Doctor: "Don't worry about it" reaches for this prescription pad and says "This little blue pill is just the ticket"...

Yes its an old one.

(about the girl at the checkout seeing it!)

(about the girl at the checkout seeing it!)

Or the barber for that matter!

#putitawaydo

my dh asked the pharmacist for 'something for my wife. She has a boil on her vulva' so proud of him.

Seeing his father, jings ? He was old and feeble, not invisible. It is all in your mind!

I love the term 'ladygarden'! But I'd use the correct term when planting it up.

My DH managed to get a very good lubricant from a French pharmacist when sex was a little difficult. He spoke no French and the pharmacist no English.
I think it involved mime of a circle made by the index finger and thumb of one hand and the index finger of the other. Appropriate movements and a pained expression and an audible 'ouch!'

Doesn't anyone else call it a pussy?

Hmm confusion...I thought lady garden referred to pubic hair, and I thought the vagina was the internal bit and the vulva external??

I would probably say , if I had to 'problems downstairs'.

My son-IL, when we were in France, went into a pharmacy to by tampons for my DD - apparently that was done in mine. The mind boggles!

Only once in my life have I wanted to use the word 'vulva', and that was in a game of scrabble, some ten years ago, where I could have won the game by putting it on triple score, but as OH and I were playing against my parents, I just couldn't bring myself to use it.

Mamacaz