Book Club Leader

How very childish of your ‘leader’ - however, I imagine these Book Clubs are really boring. To each his own……
Just get a book from the library, read it at your leisure and if you don’t like it, return it , without having to give your ‘verdict’ to anyone.
Unless ofcourse, you are being paid for your reviews.

I would have just said “what are you rolling your eyes for?” And see how she got out of that.

Extremely rude of her.
Find a better book group.

Of course, she should listen to you with respect, however much she might not agree with your views on the book.

I agree, very rude and childish.

Put a kipper through her letterbox.
If she's got a ring door bell - smile.

How very rude. Surely the point of Book Club meetings is to hear other people's views. Several times, someone in my group has said something which made me rethink some aspect of the writing.
One of the group, of whom I am very fond, invariably has a very different take on what we read: it's a given that what she likes I don't, and vice versa!

Yep....disrespectful indeed and all different views on a book should be treated respectfully.

That was one thing that did work appropriately in the bookclub I was in - until I got thrown out by the group leader because, as he said, "We know you won't have followed Lockdown - ie got that jab/wore masks/etc".

But I've not given up on bookclubs because of one mans prejudices and have still got my eyes open for another one - without a bossyboots in charge this time.

So - sympathies - and yep...due respect should be given to all different views and to all levels of books (through from lightweight fiction to the really "heavy" stuff).

This is why I'm not in a book club.

I'm in a lovely book club. We meet in a pub, have a meal, talk about all sorts of things and exchange books from our collection. We are all avid readers, we don't need to discuss books in any depth but I do get to read novels that I probably wouldn't have picked up in a book shop and no one gets put down for expressing an opinion.

That’s so rude and disrespectful of your book club leader . At my book club , we go around listening to the others reviews and opinions and then give the book a score out if 10. We also have a variety of books from high brow to light hearted .

Yes it is rude and you should have taken her up about it at the time, certainly you should think of joining another group.
Have never wanted to join a book club though people suggest it to me all the time because I love reading. But the point is I love reading books I like, not books proscribed for me by someone in a book club. Life’s too short and there are too many good books to get through unhindered.

How totally demeaning, I’d not hang around to be treated like that. A complete bullying behaviour.

Mainwin. So very rude of your ‘leader’. You should either confront her or change your book club.

Try to find a better club and dump this ''leader''/awful child.

Tell her in front of everyone else in the most patronising and condescending voice you can ''Oh, poor little (whatever her name is) needs a nap and a change of nappy''

That should make everyone else laugh while embarrassing Little Miss Bossy!

OldFrill....HA HA HA! Brilliant idea!

TheWeirdoAgain60

Try to find a better club and dump this ''leader''/awful child.

Tell her in front of everyone else in the most patronising and condescending voice you can ''Oh, poor little (whatever her name is) needs a nap and a change of nappy''

That should make everyone else laugh while embarrassing Little Miss Bossy!

No point in responding to someone else's bad childish behaviour with similar behaviour oneself. Imo that could lead to people saying "6 of one, half a dozen of the other" type comments. Many people would respond badly to you if you act like a child yourself - most likely by shuffling off away from the pair of you in embarrassment and looking for a more "adult" and classy group.

Nope.

Just either walk out of the bookclub (and do tell people why you have) or continue going - but take Mrs Leader to the side and ask her straight why she was making those faces and say that you feel disrespected by her having done so and that the leader is supposed to have an objective impartial take on things and whether she will be doing so from here on in, that all views on a book are equally valid and requesting her assurance she will stop making faces. There is just a possibility you misinterpreted her face - and that gives her a chance to give another take on what was happening (though I'd say there's a greater chance she did mean it....but you've covered all angles at any rate if you do that).

You could start this talk with her by saying something like "Maybe I'm misinterpreting and you didn't mean it that way - but it looked to me like ***** and can I have your take on what was happening here?" That way you've acted like an adult and classy etc. I would say you'll embarrass her if you were right and she was indeed acting like a child/biased observer/whatever.

Basically - that is what I see as your options.

There are a lot of Queen Bee types around and it could be that she's one of them and it's her way of keeping herself "at the top of the hill" to act this way - but asking her, as I suggested, makes it plain you know everyone is equal and you're wondering what is going on.

It may well be that you have to leave - as it becomes clear she did mean it and has no plans to change. But you will have reduced her "audience" if you do so - and a Queen Bee cannot be a QB without an audience and you would have removed part of her audience from her.

So - no-one I know would laugh at the "baby" comment. They'd all either pretend you hadnt made it - or shuffle away in embarrassment and "change the subject" quick.

If I heard that - I'd head towards buying myself a drink (if available) or pick just that moment to head to the loo and take a long enough visit things should have "changed" by the time I re-emerged.

You could stop mid sentence and look at her. If she turns round, quietly say thank you, and continue. Do it as often as it takes.
I wouldn't indulge in tit for tat shenanigans as you'll be tarred with the same brush. Be quietly dignified.

OldFrill

Put a kipper through her letterbox.
If she's got a ring door bell - smile.

Oh, that made me giggle.

I would have asked her why she was reacting in that way.
I am a book club member and our group have very different views on the books we read but we listen to and respect another members opinion.
If she does it again they question her.

I'm new to a book club group, but I can't imagine anyone being that rude, we all contribute, listen to others points of view. Books are very subjective and it's not unreasonable that people will take something different from whatever the book is, but there's no need to be discourteous. I'm with Sarnia, I'd say "may I ask about your faces, you appear to be sending out some sort of passive/aggressive signals when I'm putting forward my thoughts" Not a way to run a book club imo. Also maybe ask one or two of the others if they'd noticed it too.

I love my book club, each month the host chooses a book and the following month we meet at the next host house and discuss it.

We have very differing views and can be free to express them. As we are all adults we can do this without causing offence and it can get quite lively.

Reading something chosen by another person really opens my eyes and widens my choices of authors I would never have picked.

Why does a book group need a leader?
Find a better group.