you can probably tell I’m anxious by nature!) I was the same when my own kids were small but had control over their activities then.
Stop it now.
The key word is control.
You have to let your family live their own lives without interference, because this is what it is. My mother did similar, always insisting on knowing where and what I was doing and interrogating friends to find out if I didn't say. It continued after my marriage and children, became worse when I separated, and eventually I reunited with my husband in my forties and moved many miles away.
Sadly, it was a great relief to know my private life remained private.
I sometimes wonder if this is sometimes the cause of estrangement of adult children; too much involvement in their lives for the best possible reasons but a refusal to let go; the partner /spouse recognises it and rejects it.
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