Hypochondriac friend.

I have a friend who has always had many illnesses, or so she said. I was very relieved when she moved house and lives many miles away.

I realise she is lonely and would love to have a partner to talk to about her jaw, eyes, kidney, hip etc. She has some medical knowledge so I am told about each of these illnesses in great detail. It’s sad really.

SaraC that's lovely!

I too have a good friend, as most of you seem to have, who bores me to tears with her aches and pains. I have learnt not to ask her how she is .... but ..... does it make any difference ... no. She tells me that when she goes to the Docs ( which is often) she feels she isn’t listening to her ... I’m not surprised. The Doc must feel like I do. That said she is a good friend.

I could have written your post.My generous kind friend is 13 years younger than me and she has Crohn’s disease. Every single day there is something else wrong with her last week is was tooth ache, and dry eye. She spends so much time at the drs hospital and dentist it’s laughable if it wasn’t for the fact she’s wasting valuable NHS time. If I don’t pander to her whims and listen to every little detail of what’s wrong with her she can get huffy. She seems to relish in her ailments and she’s only just 50 I think it’s an attention thing but she’s going to run out of ailments soon.

Nanny27, I had a friend who had been told she had lung cancer but would probably live to a reasonable age because, although untreatable, it was very slow growing and I did some research on it because I was a bit suspicious but there is such a cancer. She was quite relaxed about it which was a good thing...until she died within the year. It was such a shock.

JuicyLucy Crohns Disease is a miserable and debilitating disease to suffer from, please do not lump your friend in with hypochondriacs.
It affects every aspect of your life and can have profound emotional consequences as well
Frequent, recurring diarrhoea.
Bleeding from the rectum and /or lowest portion of the large intestine that connects to the anus.
Unexplained weight loss.
Fever.
Abdominal pain and cramping.
Debilitating and absence of energy.
I would not wish it on my worst enemy.

My husband used to call his brother a gold digging hypochondriac, always had something wrong and probably thought he could make a financial claim.

'Dynamo' the young illusionist from my hometown, has Crohn's Disease, poor kid.
www.bbc.com/news/uk-43554315

I had a co-worker who had every illness our clients had. One day I turned up for work full off cold and struggling and when he said I should have stayed at home, I replied, #there are millions worse of than me that have no options but work.' he never had any illness after that

Icanhandthemback thanks for your reply I was wondering whether that could be the case. Its good to know.

When I was a child I had an elderly lady as a neighbour, at every opportunity she would waylay my parents to tell them all about her latest health woes, and it got to a point where they would actively avoid her. They would have been the first to offer help if it was actually needed, but she just seemed to 'enjoy' her ill health whilst belittling her husband who was genuinely ill, and suffering from lung cancer. Having seen this it must have made quite an impression on me, as when I became disabled some 20 years ago I decided that the last thing I would do would be to constantly moan about my health, so instead I try to find things to do which give me something other than that to talk about, even though for the vast majority of time I am stuck in bed. I also try to keep in mind that there are ALWAYS people worse off than I am. This attitude leads people to say 'I don't know how you manage to keep so cheerful', so I guess the message here is that no one really wants to be dragged down by other people's health problems, we all have them, but to constantly witter on about it just pushes people away.

Well said, MawBroonsback. Crohns is horrendous. Can be seen as somewhat as an invisible illness but I've seen it firsthand and life is not easy. I'm sure all the doctor's appointments are valid. My goddaughter is there and in hospital quite regularly. She's on a liquid diet quite often, has had an ileostomy which caused her great distress, (only 26) and it's just miserable. She is regularly put on steroids which create their own side effects. The smaller symptoms such as dry eye, cramps and fatigue are exhausting and it's quite a miserable existence for many. So no, someone with Crohns is not a hypochondriac.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I think they really believe they have their illnesses. Feel sorry for those with serious conditions, they are usually the last to moan about them.
Border girl it must be hard for you, your poor sister had to cope with so much. To lose her hair, teeth and sight, it just isn't fair. I know people with serious conditions who never moan.
Like a lot of people I get down when I get something like sciatica, but when you compare it to something like Chrohns or other life changing conditions it's a non starter, because in time it will clear.

My mother rarely visited the GP but when she did so, after a bad cough that lasted weeks, and wheeziness, she was given an inhaler. 24 hours later I returned from work to find her collapsed, she died of pneumonia aged 63.

A friend of my daughter's lost her father to cancer. It apparently started as bowel cancer. He spent months visiting his GP to no avail. When he finally got them to listen, the cancer had spread widely.

A few years ago, a good friend spent months fobbed off with IBS type diagnoses, by the time ovarian cancer was found, it was too late.

Most of us know these stories and they are hard to ignore. I do think some people are more sensitive than others. Anaesthetists apparently routinely give red haired people higher doses before operations. If you do regular bodywork such as yoga or tai chi, then you are more aware if something new crops up.

Even if you don't consult Dr Google, there are many health columns in the newspapers and campaigns from the NHS asking us to take note of lumps and bumps or attend health screening. Is it any wonder that some become over anxious?