Grandparenting and childcare

GC live too far away. I did though have 1 GC for a week when parents went on holiday from where I live. Itgerwise I've travelled to them. My parents were in their 40s when I was born and there was no way I'd have asked them to do regular childminding when I had children, they were well into their 70s. Didn't live nearby anyway. I have often wondered about people again seeming to have children later on and the level of expectation placed on GPs to childmind. Of course, later life may well mean will be at higher earnings level so can afford childcare.

I loved my younger grandmother days of taking to nursery, collecting from school, picnics & days out. My eldest is 28 going down to a 13 yr old for whom I still babysit & chauffeur. I was always determined to help my sons and daughter out by babysitting etc as I never had that, living too far away. I relocated 170 miles 8 years ago so I could help the one son I'd never been able to help, and that has worked out well. I really appreciate the relationship with all my grandchildren, that develops as they grow. I'm really lucky to have been able to be involved in their lives.

M0nica

Norah

ViceVersa

Norah

I wonder why parents (AC) don't cut coats according to cloth?

As in don't have children if you can't afford them? People's circumstances do change - often unexpectedly.

Yes, circumstances can change, it seems some may not plan well.

That was my point, plan before pregnancy (apart from the unknown).

Nobody knows what the future will bring - even a week ahead let alone over the 15 years of childhood.

A child may be conceived to a couple comfortable and secure and by the time it is born the situation has changed, illness, accident, unexpected unemployment, natural catastophe, war and all the rest.

Indeed. And not what I intended to post.

The thread was about grandparents being used as childcare, perhaps couples not beset with illness, accident, unemployment, catastrophe, war made childcare plans before pregnancy wouldn't burden grandparents?

I am an older grandmother and only looked after the grandchildren a couple of days a week. It was strenuous but I really enjoyed it.

Yes, like Ilovecheese, I was more anxious than when I looked after my own children.

Norah

ViceVersa

Norah

I wonder why parents (AC) don't cut coats according to cloth?

As in don't have children if you can't afford them? People's circumstances do change - often unexpectedly.

Yes, circumstances can change, it seems some may not plan well.

That was my point, plan before pregnancy (apart from the unknown).

Nobody knows what the future will bring - even a week ahead let alone over the 15 years of childhood.

A child may be conceived to a couple comfortable and secure and by the time it is born the situation has changed, illness, accident, unexpected unemployment, natural catastophe, war and all the rest.

ViceVersa

Norah

I wonder why parents (AC) don't cut coats according to cloth?

As in don't have children if you can't afford them? People's circumstances do change - often unexpectedly.

Yes, circumstances can change, it seems some may not plan well.

That was my point, plan before pregnancy (apart from the unknown).

Norah

I wonder why parents (AC) don't cut coats according to cloth?

As in don't have children if you can't afford them? People's circumstances do change - often unexpectedly.

I wonder why parents (AC) don't cut coats according to cloth?

Because my daughter had a six year gap between her two, and then my son's baby was born a year after that, I had quite a long stretch looking after them. I have just done my last ever run to primary school after 14 years! Once they hit secondary school I've been much less involved. Just emergency lifts and occasional school concerts.

I was 60 when the first one was born and I had him 5days a week from the time he was 6 months. I'm 79 now and probably wouldn't want to take on such a young child now.

Yes, I have posted before about the ageing process and how it might impact on our ability to offer help.
I am seventy three and much more tired after a day with my youngest toddler grandchild than I was looking after my eldest one at the same age a decade ago.
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weaker these days !

We lived too far from our children to do childcare, but my DiL's mother, who lives close to her daughter was 71 when our first grandchild was born and DS and DiL very much took her age into consideration when organising day care for DGD.

DiL's mother had her one day a week only and when DGS appeared a balance was drawn between outsourced childcare and DiL working fewer hours with her mother just providing occasional care and babysitting.

Read this over lunch. I found that, unlike one of the women quoted, I was more anxious, not less,when I looked after my grandchildren because they not mine.
I was early fifties when my first grandchildren was born, fit and well and energetic enough to do regular childcare. I am not sure I would be able to do the same now, nearly 20 years later.
Now that more women are having children in their thirties and even forties, if their own children wait until a similar age, will grandparents be fit enough I wonder, I think another childcare solution will have to be found if this long hours working culture continues.