Missing my granddaughter

My 7 year old granddaughter used to stay 2 nights a week with me before she started school. She’s refused for 2 years to stay without her mother. We have a good relationship I just accept it.

She is probably afraid her brother will get spoilt when she is with you. Why don't you invite her brother to come for sleepover with her? She would probably want to come then.

Grandparents' homes are a security blanket for grandchildren (and a little respite for parents) from toddlers to teenagers. I expect she'll come back to you. If she's into something specific, can you offer a related trip or a treat?

poor wee soul feels she's being shunted sideways so she's digging in and staying at home so her new rival doesn't win.My sisters daughter was exactly like this when she was around 4 ,once her baby brother got to an annoying stage she was happy to go stay with Granny again .Just be especially nice to her for now .She'll come back

Maybe a friend at school has had to go live with granny and misses her mum or dad and she's worried if she says she likes coming to yours she'll be there permanently.Kids have odd ( to us ) reasoning.
I think it's likely to be something happening to one of her peer group or something said by someone.

I suspect a bad case of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) at home with her little brother getting all the attention from mum and dad. Just give her time she'll come for sleepovers again. Enjoy having your little grandson for sleepovers in the meantime.

I brought my children up to be independent and they loved sleepovers with grandparents and friends almost to the extent of demanding them. They would happily sleep on the floor in a sleeping bag anywhere, My 3 GC used to stay over when they were little but now none of them do. Their parents prefer to keep them at home and the GC are convinced they would be homesick. I really feel we are missing out but there’s nothing we can do about the situation.

How old are your grandchildren? I know there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. I would never want to persuade her against her will. I think I’m taking it badly because for seven years she stayed here at least once a fortnight, and nana sleepovers were ‘the best thing in the whole wide world’. I am happy she is growing independant, but just didnt think it would happen so suddenly, or at such an early age.

Well she gave a reason and maybe it really is as simple as that - she misses mummy. Can you have mummy stay at your place with her a couple of times till she gets used to overnighting at your place again? During those stayovers do all the things you would do if she was staying with you alone, and have her mum sleep in another room if possible. If she's happy to stay with her mother also in the house then she was telling the truth about the reason.

She probably doesn't want to leave her mum and dad and brother and be the only one going to grandmas.

I was about that age when I became convinced that my beloved grandparents, who I had stayed with every summer for 2 weeks or so since the age of 3 (I actually preferred their sedate life to my chaotic family life in London with 2 younger siblings), were not themselves but people dressed up as them. I stopped even kissing them hello or goodbye when they visited us. This strange belief lasted a few months but then I grew out of it - looking back I suppose I had just become aware that bad things happened to people and that there were bad people in the world.

Another thing I have just remembered from my own childhood is going through a phase of being scared of anything to do with death. I think around 7 you've finally taken the topic on board as something real and as at 7 you think everyone older than your own parents is 100 years old, it figures that you might wake up in the night and find them suddenly but naturally dead (of old age). In which case you don't want to find yourself the only living person still in the house! Perhaps open a dialog about ages, find out how old she thinks you are, and generational stuff and maybe once the topic of lifecycle is opened up she might say something (not suggesting you start off by talking about dying of course - no point putting ideas into her that she hasn't already got)

I think youre right. Her other granny died two years ago age 52 and she seemed to handle it really well at the time, but now asks lot sof questions about her, and about my sister who died a few years ago. Her daddy has also just been in hosp for an operation, and their beloved wee dog is very poorly at the moment and she keeps asking if hes going to die. Think she just realises what death actually means, and its scary.

I'm so sorry. Hopefully it's just a phase. Maybe she can bring a friend along or even her mom (if Mom is up for it?).

I remember spending a week at my grandma's (who lived 10 hours away) with my brother and it was so much fun. Then my dad came to pick us up and I said I wanted to stay. So he just took my brother and left me there another week. That week was terrible. I was more homesick than I'd ever been. And even after I got back home, I had terrible insomnia and nightmares for weeks. I had to sleep in my parents' floor. Kids just go through these weird phases.

When I was a child my Dad used to love taking us for "Sunday drives". Once I was sick in the car ( all over the car to be honest) and I never , ever, went in the car again for Dad's drives. Such a shame when I think back but the experience spooked me ! Maybe this is what has upset your DGD. Sad, but there may not be much you can do. Just spend what time you can with her, and enjoy what you get. Best wishes !

My 26 year old daughter has fallen out with me for reasons that are really not clear. I’ve supported her always. Been there. Loved her.
More importantly this means I am unable (at the moment) to see my granddaughter. She’s 4. I’ve been in her life from the second she was born. I cut the cord. Been in her life longer than her own father! And now. Nothing.
I miss her like crazy. All I can do right now is wait until something changes. I’m devastated. My daughter has a boyfriend who has been in prison. Lies. Steals. Is a bully. And yet he gets to see my granddaughter daily. Where’s the sense in that.

Update....after two months of being offhand with me, not wanting to spend time with us or have sleepovers, two weeks ago my grand-daughter said she missed me and could she come for a sleepover! I was over the moon. Things are completely back to normal now, she is so loving towards my husband and I, and wants to come to stay all the time. I can only think it was a strange stage she went through, and eventually realised how much fun she was missing!

Fickle for sure! Are there any activities you can do only when she sleeps over to make it more fun to come over as she moves into her new age range and interests?