Just got congratulated for being able to use my debit card!

Maybe you should be grateful she didn't pat you on the head and gush "good girl!"

(She didn't pat you on the head, did she?)

I’d thank her profusely and inwardly fume. Or make a comment like I had joined the 21st century despite appearances…

How patronising!

I would have tried to look wise and calm, nodding my head and saying "Yes, your turn will come."

Ouch! How very patronising.

Yesterday, in Lidl, I was struggling to lift my heavy rucksack onto my back in preparation for walking home in the rain, I apologised for holding up the queue at the only non self-service checkout. I had a full bags in each hand too and muttered about not having a car.
The young man said "it's good exercise".
Maybe I should have been flattered but I said "is it? wait until you're nearly 80".

I volunteer at a till once a week and serve all ages. Most people pay with cards but if they use cash, the machine calculates the change. I then have to find the right coins. It's a sad fact that the young volunteers cannot add change quickly.

I m afraid I wouldn’t have smiled quietly
Patronising git

Yesterday I popped into Aldi for a few things. I used the self service till, but as often happens, I needed help twice- not my fault either time: one item had no bar code, another was rejected as overweight. Somehow I failed to finish and pay! I walked out with a bag in each hand. The same assistant came running after me. Not cross, not trying to arrest me, thankfully.
He just said “ I’m afraid your shopping didn’t go through”. So I went back to the machine and paid by debit card, as I normally do.
I daren’t tell my daughter as she will think I am getting dementia. I’m not. Just got distracted.
I am just relieved that the assistant dealt with the situation the way he did!

I am 76 and the for last few months I have noticed more cars stopping to let me cross the road. I do pull a shopping trolley. A smart one. Black and white stripes. My hair is grey, but a fairly decent bob cut. I walk quickly.
Is it the trolley? Would they stop if I were pulling a suitcase and off on holiday. Is the Grim Reaper walking behind me?

I am not complaining as it means I can get across the road. But am quite prepared to wait for a space.
A friend of 82 said to me yesterday that this is the first year she has felt old. Is it the weather or state of the counry/world?

The debit card malarkey would have had me growling. I may even have said "glad to see you can use a till"- but probably not.

It’s probably one of those situations where shock takes away the right response until five minutes too late, but it would be good to smile brightly, and say ‘Thank you dear. And most younger (or middle aged if appropriate) people have good manners. It’s good to be different, isn’t it?’

Helterskelter1 it's probably not an age thing when vehicles stop to let you cross the road. The Highway Code rules regarding pedestrians crossing the road changed in 2022. In certain circumstances, junctions for instance, drivers are required by law to stop for pedestrians. In others drivers are advised to stop to allow pedestrians to cross.
I've noticed more drivers stopping for me, but I think it's because the rules have changed in my favour when on foot.
Huia the assistant on the till hopefully thought she was paying you a compliment. What younger people don't realise is that many people in their 70's and 80's worked with computers etc. in their younger years and have kept up with technology since retirement.

But there are fumblers, alas more of the old than young. Sometimes when in the queue behind someone of my own age taking a long time to find her card, etc,, I have to remind myself inwardly : "understanding, tolerance, smile." No doubt I'll be fumbling one day, hopefully not soon.

BlueBelle

I m afraid I wouldn’t have smiled quietly
Patronising git

I agree Bluebelle. I'd have to walk away and restrain myself.

80 is old.

Sorry if that upsets anyone, but it is😬

I’m 63 and decided to embrace my grey. Since then I’ve found that men in particular are patronising. I listen to the mansplaining and then ask them if they felt the need to do that to reinforce it in their own heads. One friend’s husband spent ages explaining to me how data can be stolen when using an open network. Not sure it needed explaining, I taught IT in a college and my specialism was cyber security, and he knows that!

Lathyrus I may be in my dotage, being 82, but my brain remains sharp. Perhaps I should be ga-ga, but I am not. As others have said, your time will come.

I too would like to congratulate you on your great achievement!

Charleygirl5

Lathyrus I may be in my dotage, being 82, but my brain remains sharp. Perhaps I should be ga-ga, but I am not. As others have said, your time will come.

Well, actually it won’t.

I regularly use the self service tills and I don't usually have any problems.

The other day a male assistant, who must have been close in age to me, popped up and said "I saw you struggling."(I wasn't) "Let me help you." He then proceeded to completely muck up my transaction so that my loyalty card was not registered and he had to ask another assistant to sort it out before I could complete payment.

Lathyrus3

80 is old.

Sorry if that upsets anyone, but it is😬

It might be but it doesn't mean we're decrepit and confused.
I'd be thinking "I was using computers before your parents were born, dear!"

Now, if only I could find my debit card I could finish the Christmas shopping .....

Lathyrus 🤗

Yesterday, in Lidl, I was struggling to lift my heavy rucksack onto my back in preparation for walking home in the rain, I apologised for holding up the queue at the only non self-service checkout. I had a full bags in each hand too and muttered about not having a car.

Grammaretto my Dad was 87 when he moved from the south coast to our Midlands town in 2018. It was a couple of weeks before we could bring his car up, so he walked to his local Morrisons with his rucksack.

Twice complete strangers insisted on giving him a lift home with his shopping.
He was tickled pink at how friendly and helpful people were to him 😊

What a miserable thread.

All these grumpy old people with their rude reactions to someone who is trying to be pleasant and kind.

I used to be quite puzzled by comments on how much I laugh and smile. Now I see why🤣🤣

I regularly use the self service tills and I don't usually have any problems.

I very rarely set foot in a supermarket as I do all my shopping online. My husband loves going so he picks up any odds and ends.
Recently I had to go to Morrisons for a couple of things, but luckily the 11 year old boy I look after talked me through the self check-out till 😁
He goes every week with his mum and dad.

Also I think I'm on the defensive a lot of the time.
I was in Sainsburys in the city buying a meal deal and ofcourse you have to pay at the Self Service, cards only.
I took a while to find where to scan the things and in the flash of an eye the bored attendant came over to help me.
I guess they have to do their job but I can't help feeling they see grey hair and are over eager to rush to the rescue.

I have a slightly younger friend who is too proud to use a shopping bag on wheels. If you don't want to use the car it makes such sense IMO.
I've been using one for years to take my pottery to craft fairs.

I am yet a spring chicken at 72, but I have some mobility issues and I find that when I walk with my stick, drivers often stop and wave me across the road.