Grandparent names

Your son is right in his loyalty to his wife. Without knowing why your DiL wants different names for you and your husband, it's hard to understand what the objection is other than an aversion to change or not liking someone else to suggest something.

@baggs. She says she doesn't like them but I suspect it's the latter of your thoughts.

Nanny48, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest - as a name is just a sound, after all. Still, the new baby won't be talking for a while - but will be listening - and will probably copy the other kids anyway.

I went to a neighbour's party and a toddler there took a shine to me and followed me everywhere, saying 'Gran, want drink, Gran, fell over, Gran pick up' etc. We came to the conclusion that, to him, 'Gran' meant old woman - any old woman.

I'm just 'Nanny' to my lot - except one family, where I'm 'Nanny white hair' (to differentiate me from 'Nanny brown hair) - but I really don't care.

Our GC and GGC all use names they made - for us. Safe to assume your GC will all repeat the same name - if/when they are together.

I’m called Nanny, Granny and GaGa by different GC, don't make a big thing of it, the child will call you whatever they decide they want to. Don’t turn it into a fight.

I went to a neighbour's party and a toddler there took a shine to me and followed me everywhere, saying 'Gran, want drink, Gran, fell over, Gran pick up' etc. We came to the conclusion that, to him, 'Gran' meant old woman - any old woman.

Love this! 😊 And it reminds me of DD3 when very young thinking all other people were girls because her two big sisters were spoken of as the girls, so when a friend – already a grandfather – visited, she called him "Girl" too.

You know what, I can’t believe that people who are fortunate enough to have beautiful, healthy grandchildren can get so bothered about a name.

Hmm. The other Gm and I are both Granny, our own choices, so Granny L and Granny M if they’re referring to us when we’re absent.
I would draw the line at Grandma - to me it sounds older and fatter, and I’m old and fat enough already, thanks. I don’t much like Nanny or Nana either, though both elder Gdcs called me Nanny when they were too little to manage Granny, and funnily enough, from them it sounded 😍.

I am called by three different names. The eldest calls me by a name she made up which I like. Her twin brother used to call me the same name until he decided it was too odd and he chose to call me Grandma which I like because he likes it. My son’s children call me Granny (chosen by my son probably because it was what he called my mother) because the other one is Grandma to all eleven of hers. I don’t think the name matters at all.

From experience, once the new GC starts talking they will put their own spin on whatever your DIL wants them to call you, sadly any little ones pronounce names/words perfectly when they begin speaking. Don't stress over it, the GC will love you all the same.

The baby’s parents are going to refer to you by the name they have chosen so I don't think you will have a say in it.

Is it an unusual name that the other grandchildren call you? Or is it the name her parents are callled?

My neighbour insists on being called a rather unusual name to her grandchildren which they do not use when talking about her as they are embarrassed.

I agree with Hetty58,can`t add to that.

What does it matter what they call you?

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet That is a quote from Romeo &Juliet and refers to Romeo being who he is regardless of what name he is calle. If Shakespeare can say it so beautifully, who are you to disagree?

Lots of grandparents are called lots of different names by different families of grandchildren. I couldn't care less what my DGC call me, that they know me and love me, that is all that matters.

I am a paternal grandmother, I have a wonderful DiL and as far as I am concerned, I couldn't give a toss what she teaches the DGC to call me.

And some people would be happy to be called Vlad the Destroyer, if they had a grandchild to do that.

Well, Nanny48, seeing as you ask, I think I'd find this a bit confusing too. My lot have a plethora of names for all their grandmothers - Granny, Grandma, Gran, Nanna, Nan. I'm just glad I know which one I have to respond to.

I'd go along with what the DDIL wants though, for the sake of family peace and harmony.

I’m Grandma, and the other one is Granny.she insisted on me having first choice between Granny and Grandma, though I’d have been happy with either. I chose Grandma because I preferred my own Grandma to my Granny.

We didn’t contemplate any other names. To both of us, a nanny is a nursemaid, not a grandmother.,

You are still the grandparent, no matter what name is picked

This is not worth the battle on a cloudy relationship with the parents of the child

I don't want things strained with our dil

Then I think you would be best to go by whatever name they give you. In the grand scheme of things I don’t think it matters a jot.

Witzend I would draw the line at Grandma - to me it sounds older and fatter

I would very much dislike being called Grandma, same reason. Fortunately none of our GC and GGC selected Grandma or any derivative.

Not worth a strained relationship - you say complaining leads to strain.

For the sake of maintaining a good relationship it's best to just go along with what they want, isn't it?
I'm Nan to all my grandchildren and just love it.

I’m a Nonna and I love it but I really wouldn’t care less about the name to be honest.
My MIL wanted to be called Grandmama, my DCs called her Gran.

I think it makes sense for the new baby to call you by the same name as your other grandchildren. Wouldn't it be confusing otherwise, it sounds to me like your dil is trying to be awkward

i have a grandson who is 3 and is autistic, he has difficulty speaking and has just learned to say mummy and daddy, i refer to me as gran or granny, i don't like nana, i also have a step-grandson who remembers his gran and he calls me by my first name, i have never liked titles and all 5 of my siblings children call me by my first name and not auntie, if you really don't want to be called what your dil is asking then explain and come up with something else.

I wouldn't want to be called by a name I didn't like. I do understand your upset, but I wouldn't make waves for now. Sometimes toddlers will choose their own name, and it sticks.

I have always been Granny, by my own choice, and no objections. My DH is Grampa, but my DS's children started calling him Poppa because their other grandfather was Poppa. He gently corrected them and is now established as Grampa. No hurt feelings.

I would wait and see what develops. Once your new grandchild hangs out with their cousins and see what they call you, the little one may fall in line.