On being called Darling and Love

I get cheesed off with it. I find it horribly condescending. I have learnt to answer crisply with whatever condescending title I have been given.

I can live with it! I have a Geordie SIL who calls me pet!

They’re probably just trying to be friendly. It wouldn’t worry me. We usually get you guys or, sometimes, darl.

I think it's a regional thing. Where my daughter lives, everybody is called "luv", whether they're young, old, male or female. I certainly don't take it personally.

My FIL always used to call me dux. He did it so often I ceased to notice it.

I rather like it though in our part of Yorkshire everyone is addressed as ‘love’ no matter the age or gender. It would be a shame if regional quirks like this disappeared.

It'd get on my nerves.if every sentence contained "love"

Where we live now, everyone, but everyone calls each other 'my lovely'. I love it and will start using the the term myself soon.

I prefer it to Madam...
Madam is awful, aging and condescending!
Darling/love is endearing and gender neutral.

I think it depends on how it is used. I don't have a problem with it per se, unless it is being used in a condescending or patronising context. We have a receptionist at our GP practice who calls you darling or beautiful on the phone, and to be honest, it would grate on me, but she's actually the nicest and most helpful receptionist there, so I don't mind.

MarieElla

I prefer it to Madam...
Madam is awful, aging and condescending!
Darling/love is endearing and gender neutral.

Exactly!

I don’t mind being addressed as “darlin’” it’s a local term around here and far better than being called “lovely” or “mate” which are not. I think the former is West Country and the latter probably Essex. When we lived in Leicester it was always “me duck”. 🤣

It was always ‘me duck’ in DH’s part of Yorkshire as well.

Round here, it's "moy luvlee". I rather like it. Southern merging into south-western.

I quite like it, but like with most things (even my given name) irritating on repeat.

For women you are often called cariad in South Wales, for men it’s butt. Often you get called love too, it doesn’t bother me at all, in fact I don’t really notice.

From Lancashire originally where most are addressed as love, is just something people do without thinking about it.
In Geordie environs is pet, and was called duck when visiting friends in the midlands. In London or Essex can be dear, sweets, mate, or darling.
In Wales gave been called ‘my lovely’.
It might grate on people’s nerves but I don’t object, have been called worse.

*have been called ‘my lovely’

Doesn't bother me in the least. Better than some of the things I've heard people called. Usually it's people who don't know your name, anyway, so it's not like they are refusing to use it.

Up North it was always 'hen' or 'pet lamb' with DH's family and my family from Scotland.

In the US it always made me giggle to be called Ma'am but I got used to it soon enough. When in Rome...

I had no problem with being called love, until an 18 year old kept on saying it. It drove me mad, so much so that it’s my username!

I have no problem with most endearments but I dislike ‘lovely’, without the ‘my’ and ‘hun’ which both strike me as insincere.

Often called love of lovely. I’m not sure I always notice and to be fair I’ve been called far worse! Family from elsewhere in the UK call me duck. Over the bridge folk have called me cariad. All are fine by me. I’ve noticed younger family call women and girls babe or bubs, now that one does irritate me.

Can't say it bothers me normally. I hate it when it's aggressive though. Normally starts with 'look love'. I then tell them not to call me love.

Autumncolours

I rather like it though in our part of Yorkshire everyone is addressed as ‘love’ no matter the age or gender. It would be a shame if regional quirks like this disappeared.

Here too. some local workmen still call each other "luv".

White hair and a warm polite smile in my experience often gets extra help. (Even if I dont need it as I go to the gym - the next older lady with white hair and a smile may need that help)

What I'm not so happy with is the newish use of "aw, bless" that sometimes comes when someone is just casually putting me in an elderly box in a writing off sort of way. It happens to my severely disabled DGD and its a way of not actually taking the real person on board.

To me, saying, "bless you" has a very special meaning, when someone is truly needful of great kindness and is the kind of person who will respond to those specific words.

But mainly I'm happy to get the considerations and continually amazed by how kind some young people can be.

(You are for a moment, their gran or the gran they have wanted if gratitude back is warm and genuine, and its cross cultural too - I have found some other cultures do indeed respect their elders better!)