christmas and birthday gifts

That's true, M0nica.

People say these things hoping to spark a reaction. If they do not get one, it rather spoils the fun, so I would ignore it and act las if it had never been seen.

She only shows herself up by talking like that, why play her silly little game.

Everyone has different spending priorities, in this case neither are right or wrong.

Give your granddaughter gifts when you are alone with her.

people are far more aware ofthe reality of this situation than you may think.. she's been sussed but obviously everyone ignors it for family harmony.. your generosity has not gone unnoticed..

Shrug if off, it's not worth even thinking about.

I think you have to leave it. Everyone around (apart from young children) will be very aware of what is happening; and if you say anything it will upset people you care about and create family tension.
You could smile and say "we do what we can" which is quite neutral and inoffensive, but sometimes saying something like that can end up with a bitter tone, so I would just smile and keep the high ground.

I would leave it as she is a delightful person otherwise.

I would say nothing! just ignore it.

Coolgran65

When she says this what about being honest and say very lightly.....oh now I feel embarrassed.

Yes, or a slightly different version of this is to smile and say ‘Did you mean to make me feel awkward?’ Framing it as a question means that she needs to come up with an answer - if it’s ‘No, of course not’ (as it almost certainly will be) you can keep your smile and say something like’ No, I didn’t think you’d do that on purpose. It does a bit though, but now I know you don’t mean it unkindly I won’t let it bother me’.

It is rude but you have the moral high ground so just let it go with a graceful shrug.

That's a tricky one. I would love you to say "Can't you...that's a shame". But that would be going to her level.

I think Coolgran65s rejoinder is just right. She is being extremely rude to make any comment apart from "what a lovely present".
I have no GC and sometimes it's a relief. I can think of one possible "other gran" who would have been a nightmare!

What i meant to say is that her competition game is very transparent

People who know the real you will ignore the passive aggressive comments

People know the real you and the real her - please dont worry

When she says this what about being honest and say very lightly.....oh now I feel embarrassed.