Is it me?

I saw a young girl (Primary age ) in the playground of my GS's school with 'You wish!' in sparkling letters on her T shirt. What her parents were thinking of I do not know. I hate the American trend for 'tarting up' little girls and the dreadful beauty pageants. I saw a documentary about them some years ago; a mother was scraping her child's hair back and clearly causing her some upset - mother was making soothing noises and saying 'Didn't she want to look her best?' She then emptied half a can of hairspray over the child's face and head. Dancing and performing are confidence builders, but why all the warpaint - not necessary. Fortunately my DiL is very much of that mind with my GD - she wouldn't allow GD to be 'made up' at a party recently for six year olds.

Once again I think it is social media and the "selfie" brigade that's the problem. I never used to pout for photos but now on a day out with my sister's and friends we do a selfie and then the giddiness sets in and we start pouting. It's funny for us looking at the because I can assure you the photos are anything but sexy. However look at any teenager taking a selfie when they are dressed up and the inevitable pout us there. I am uncomfortable seeing toddlers and young children dressed and acting provocatively and it does make me wonder why the parents encourage it. Did you see "My big fat gypsy wedding" and the one about the youngsters taking their first holy communion? The amount of spray tan and "lispick" (as the young girls called it) they used was by the lorry load...and that was for the girls making their holy communion! The dancing they did at the party afterwards was anything but innocent! Children are growing up too quickly. They aspire to images portrayed in the media without the emotional maturity. If only we could go back to story books rather than the internet.

I agree Seadragon - athletes at important events do not choose their own kit and the people who do it for them should be choosing practical items, not underwear, for them. Beach volleyball is a case in point, not my cup of tea really but these young ladies are serious in their sport and should not be made to feel as if they are in a peep show. As for provocative clothes for children, it's difficult to find a girl's teeshirt without a sparkly unicorn or something from 'Frozen' on the front, and don't get me started on the endless sea of pink. I thought DD was making a fuss about nothing until I actually looked around the shops. Can't we just have practical, colourful clothing for our kids?

As you can see it is not just you. I too am with you on this one.

Summerstorm I know what you mean. DGD1 (13) does like fashion and tries out make up and odd hairstyles. though is more into holey jeans and sweatshirsts than skimpy stuff!
Thursday evening and Sunday morning though she is racing around captaining her football team!

My granddaughter just turned 9, has lately been wearing a sporty type crop top under her clothes. I don't see the point of it, she's skinny and as flat as a pancake, it's not really a bra, it's the sort of sports type vest young women who have a toned midriff wear at the gym, but for a child kind of superfluous, it's not a vest or even a Liberty Bodice for the present day. Anyway mine is not to reason why, I just wash it and send it back.

What concerns me is that if you mention ‘dancing’ to a child from toddler age up, they just wiggle their hips. I’m sure it shows my age, but to me childhood dancing is skipping about. Those of you who did the wriggling kind of dancing in the ‘60s probably find it normal. Although I was in my twenties in the 60s, I was never attracted to that kind of ‘dancing’, though sometimes I couldn’t avoid it. I’d rather get to know someone by talking to them rather than wriggling at them!

I would send a child to ballet lessons, real ballet as soon as they’re old enough. It will help to give them discipline, style, elegance and grace. They might even hear some good music, It is never vulgar or provocative - though it can involve skimpy clothing, I suppose.

Our little granddaughters go to dance classes and yes, when music is playing at home they know all the hip-thrusting, twerking, pouting, posing styles and demonstrate them. It is really disconcerting because they are entirely innocent. It's horrible.

However, if you look at any modern music videos to accompany songs, all the women singers tend to be scantily clad and making sexually suggestive/provocative movements. I find them disturbing.

Yes, I can understand stage make up and costumes for shows, but the older girls wear skin tight lycra, cut away wherever possible to reveal flesh when they do their suggestive dance routines.

Little girls seem to wear tight lycra leggings and bra tops now, to reveal a bare midriff. Many have earrings and shoes with heels. The sexualisation of young children is a disturbing trend.

I believe childhood should be a time of innocence and play, without pressure, and we should be making it last as long as possible, not curtailing it.

For DGD, dancing has always meant ballet, we have got film of her at 2, demonstrating ballet on our front lawn. She is now 11 and ballet is her dancing true love, although she does tap as well.

Whatever peer group pressure may be it is the home ethic that is the real decider. DGD's friendship group, since she was primary age has been with children from parents with similar values to her parents. Her friends were of her own making. The parents only got to know each other once the children had befriended each other.

They are now all at secondary school together and, obviously their friendship group is expanding, but even these new friends have families with similar values.

DGDs also go to ballet classes. When they are here if they want to dance we have excerpts from Swan Lake and the Nutcracker plus other snippets from ballets available. They have a whale of a time gliding around, flapping arms, pointing toes, leaping etc! Every held pose is dignified and elegant. So much easier for us to witness. Good exercise too, and not a pout in sight!

Totally with you, Daddima. Why on earth do we want children to grow up so fast! Totally ridiculous! I hate seeing children wearing make-up or anything that makes them look like small adults. Why on earth does anyone think it's okay? Childhood is short enough. I think children should wear old clothes and mess about outside. That's my idea of childhood. One of my earliest memories is rolling in the long grass with my friends and looking up at the blue sky. It was beautiful and we were all covered in dirt but so what.

I have to agree with the overwhelming majority on this; that children are hypersexualised by a self-absorbed (overtly subliminal), sex obsessed culture.
Make-up? On 6 year olds ...why use glitter? Have you seen what it does to the marine environment?
[sigh] Perhaps we'll open our collective eyes just before we fall into the abyss..

It really bothers me. When my daughter was learning ballet, her teacher insisted that none of the girls were to wear makeup, and there were certainly no provocative poses. I think parents should be very careful with sites such as Facebook, as there are horrid people out there looking at pictures of young girls.

Dubious men do not look at a child 5-15 year olds that are dress as mini call girls and think awww she’s lovely....they think WOW..She looks dead sexy..and it’s not only bad minded men it could be adolescence boys..Sex is instilled in children from very early age in schools so it’s not that it’s a different age, it’s still children who are forced into the sexual elements of life but have not got the intelligence to be grown up.....lost childhood.

Daddima
I'm with you on that subject.
I realise that quite a few children of all genders (note how I swerved there are into dancing of various sorts but yes, it can make for slightly uncomfortable viewing. The strutting, semi-revealing clothes, tans, hair and make up...
Not something I agree with but, if they're happy and well adjusted...at least they are not holed up in their bedrooms taking selfies all the time.

My 7 year old granddaughter is no dancer ....but a great little footballer! Not a sexy pose or skimpy skirt in sight. Shorts down to the knees and socks up to the knees. In my opinion all the better for it. Time enough for all that nonsense when they’re teenagers.

Went to our local Tesco express on Sunday and was genuinely shocked when a father and his 2 daughters (both definitely younger than 8)came in. The oldest girl was wearing a seriously short dress, and literally a bra. They were both smothered in make up and wearing ridiculously high shoes.

I understand people should be able to wear what they want, but this truly made me think why would any parent allow their child to go out like this. .

I find it distasteful to say the least. Mothers especially, are far too eager to see their little darlings grow up. Let them be children for heavens' sake, real life will hit them soon enough. I disagree with piercings on tiny children too, even seen a six month old with a pearl stud in her ear. Still, who are we to condemn/judge, each to his own and we all have the right to do what we want provided we don't hurt others.

I think that piercing a baby's ears is 'hurting others.' In my opinion it should be illegal until mid-teens, when the child can decide for itself. There have been some horrific injuries caused by piercings going wrong, too.

I don't like it at all. It's totally unnecessary and a definite no no

I hate to see little girls made-up to look like grown women! There's something very distasteful about it.