Veni et ego profectus sum rumpitur

thank You Shandi, Maw took a hammering, it was brutal .

May I say to new posters who are thinking of leaving, don’t, a year ago my world collapsed, I was alone, I turned to here and I still say a year on, and will always say, the caring and support here saved my life . And there is fun here too

Diva ah I see what you mean.

It would have made a perfectly reasonable thread until it stopped being about the subject and started getting personal.

That happens a lot on GN . It used to be especially true of the political threads but there seems to have been a huge change there which may or may not have been because of the departure of a number of contributors , I don't know.

I was also quite angry and a bit upset at the spoofs we had over Christmas and the weeks running up to it I did quite a bit of reporting some were removed some were ‘thank you we ll keep an eye on it’ I was so annoyed that kind hearted people were getting drawn into empathic posts while the joker was laughing up their sleeve
I am a little bit cross that we are asked to help but then often slapped on the hand I think GRansnet admin should be more willing to accept what we are telling them when we are quite obviously concerned about a poster and very aware of the way it’s all going
Hopefully it’s gone for now but I think we need a plan in case it happens again My plan is if a NEW poster posts something that looks unusually or salacious or contentious connect with them before giving advice, help or opening your heart ask them as a new poster to introduce themselves tell us more often trolls don’t come back on the thread they start by throwing in the firework and retreat to watch Keep your advice until we are sure it’s a genuine poster

I think most posters have eloquently on this thread laid bare some of the issues which does put members off and in some cases never to return.

I to have only been on here for a year or two and do not post regularly. Not because I have nothing to say but generally do not want to attract unwelcome responses. Having said that if I feel I can add to a particular thread, I will especially if information posted may not be accurate for the OP.

Many times instead of joining in with a thread that is turning rancid I just bite my tongue and let others get on with it.

Thanks for raising this post Maw, it needed to be said. Over the Christmas period, it became almost impossible to look at a thread and know whether it was genuine or not; likewise to know whether one should contribute and feed it or take it at face value.
I reported more suspect posts over the Christmas period than I've ever felt I had to do in all the time I've been a member of GN and it really soured it all for me. As for the abuse and downright nastiness of some of the "new" posters; it's quite striking that, now that the main culprits seem to slithered away for another year, the tone and friendship of what makes GN a good place to hang out, has largely returned.

But my point about the nastiness of existing members to new members is a valid one. If you are indeed genuine and looking for help some of the comments and very personal remarks must be very upsetting and enough to drive you away never to return. How do you judge, can you rely on your judgement being 100% correct?

It bothers me that some people are taken in by the threads that are started with an intention to stir things up. Those of us that have been around a while get 'a feel' for a bad thread. We can leave them alone but other people will be taken in. They may give more information than is wise and they may be upset.

But, if we say anything such as 'onesie' or 'windy', we have our threads deleted. GN isn't a nice place to be at the moment. Apart, from the Good Morning Thread and The Kitchen and I expect that will be spoilt before ;long - despite soop's best efforts.

Maw - I agree GN has had a strange atmosphere over Christmas.
Felice - I hope all goes well for your op.
Annie - I'm glad you have decided not to leave.
I'm sure things will settle down.

If I get any sort of bad vibe on reading a thread...as in the ones over Christmas..I just steer clear.. ignore them..

I saw a six of one, half a dozen of the other atmosphere on here.
Lots of people getting irate about nothing of any great importance.

Farview that is a good point of view fir you but doesn’t help people who are going the extra mile to help someone they feel is in distress and getting taken in

A distinct lack of response from GNHQ but it's clear that many of us share the same concerns so let's hope that after due consideration they get back to us with some suggestions or questions.

Yes, MissAdventure.
Agree.

prestbury I was set to make a comment on this thread when finished reading all comments.
Your comment said it all for me. It is exactly what I would have said. Thank you.

I was shocked that some of the long-time regular posters had such nasty abuse hurled at them. I would have ducked below the wall and dug an escape trench.
I hope GN returns to the friendly, welcoming, and informative forum it has been in the past.

Well said, MissA

For myself I am saddened that HQ have responded on another thread about a technical issue, but have so far not peeped in here (or have they?)

Felice I’ve just lost a long, post to you. Simply put it was that DH has had both knees done. He felt it was definitely worthwhile. You will be fine. Best wishes on Wednesday

I think it was all due to the long drawn out 2 weeks Christmas and New Year break where a few had too much time/wine on their hands and decided to channel their own " entertainment " by ruffling everyone's feathers here.

Anyway it's back to work and school so there shouldn't be any more shenanigans until at least Easter although there are bound to be the odd clash of personalities, but hey-ho onwards and upwards.

I'm sure this isn't the first time things have got a bit nasty here over a long Christmas holiday. I have noticed it before. Just a few new posters out for trouble, and some existing posters challenge them, and it all gets very unpleasant.

I feel we should totally ignore their posts, as they thrive on the attention. I know many of you don't agree.

I agree with Kittys' post Mon 07-Jan-19 17:00:43 . GN should let us warn new posters of a possibly suspect post in some agreed way, just until it's been investigated.

The only alternative I can think of, is not to accept new members for a short period before and over Christmas, unless recommended by a existing member. I realise this is a bit drastic and unfair to some who might really need help, especially over the Christmas period.

I think , if in doubt Diva , ask the poster for more details . I think Bluebelle has a good point.

I got totally confused as I was not around so much when the unhappy posts began.. came in part way and it took a little bit of reading through to appreciate what was happening. It is hard for admin to know for certain who is out with a wooden spoon and who is just a naïve poster. I have a friend who is admin on another type of forum and he says it can be a tightrope!. Glad we are able to air our concerns..thanks Maw

I found it a bit odd how some posters kept coming back for more. There couldn't possibly have been some (whispers) enjoyment involved, could there.? No! Daft idea!

Felice I wish you well for your op on Wednesday and your recuperation afterwards.

I remember your thread
and agree that some poster s were unable to take on board how your health system works and were quite derogatory when you tried to explain

Please post and keep us updated with your recovery.???

Even if it looks as though a person has brought everything on themselves and asks us if we think they are in the wrong, they rarely want to be told yes; in reality they may be feeling fragile, and being told too bluntly that their problem it is all their fault, can destroy them. As few, if any, of us are trained counsellors we could potentially do a lot of harm..

starbird I am sorry I disagree. If someone posts a problem on an open forum like this, they must know that not everybody will agree with them and they will say so. There is no room for abuse or nastiness, but there is room to say politely, now and again, that someone is making a lot of fuss over nothing.

We have many posts from people in desperate situations to whom most of us will offer help and advice if we can, but when someone posts to say that they have been crying for 2 days because the Sainsbury's delivery was an hour late and they ran out of biscuits when their DGC came round. I think it is quite reasonable, to point out politely that they are over reacting.

Just hum a quick chorus of 'Walk Away, Renée' and leave 'em to it.