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“Wives create their husbands”

(87 Posts)
Polly48 Tue 16-Oct-18 16:26:57

Just started reading a book called “Four letters of love” by Niall Williams, and this paragraph made me smile -
Wives create their husbands. They begin with that rough raw material, that blundering, well-meaning and handsome youthfulness they have fallen in love with, and then commence the forty years of unstinting labour it takes to make the man with whom they can live

And - By the time my father had been three times promoted, I imagine my mother believed her work with him was over. He no longer squeezed toothpaste from the middle, never came from the garden on to the cream-coloured carpet she had bought for the hall without removing his shoes, never attempted to wear the same socks or underpants two days running, bathe less than four times a week, nor leave the toilet seat up after urinating.

smile

123kitty Thu 18-Oct-18 10:02:46

You can only change a male is when he's wearing nappies.

nigglynellie Thu 18-Oct-18 10:30:24

123kitty, ?????!!!

Jaxie Thu 18-Oct-18 12:03:53

Fennel: I agree, my husband is so selfish that I have no expectations of him. He's what my mother would call: "A small parcel." No friends, doesn't engage, stingy, never initiates any outings or fun, won't go out for a meal: how do you think he will be remembered? Without my women friends for consolation I would have hit him over the head with a rolling pin years ago.

Maimeo Thu 18-Oct-18 14:51:02

Couldn’t agree more with Eloethan and Shortlegs, unbelievably patronizing attitudes towards men here..... wouldn’t be at all acceptable if it was the other way around!!

Jalima1108 Thu 18-Oct-18 14:58:19

123kitty grin

Jalima- sometimes our house looks like it’s been burgled!
Pamela the odd thing is that his end of the office is very tidy whilst mine is chaos (I did attempt to tidy up today but then more paperwork arrived!).
His wardrobe, drawers etc are all tidy inside so I wonder if he leaves the doors and drawers open all the time to show how tidy they are
And leaves the dirty water in the sink to show that 'yes, he has washed up - again'.
confused

Jalima1108 Thu 18-Oct-18 15:00:15

wouldn’t be at all acceptable if it was the other way around!!

I don't mind if DH posts on here about my shortcomings grin

nigglynellie Thu 18-Oct-18 16:02:01

Me neither!! He wouldn't though as he would consider posting on here a bit, well, naff!!

Jalima1108 Thu 18-Oct-18 19:07:19

"She doesn't jump to it when the oven beeps because she's on the computer - what on earth can she be doing"?

watermeadow Fri 19-Oct-18 18:37:26

I didn’t create my husband. Why would I have chosen to make a man like that? Leaving him was the best thing I ever did.

PamelaJ1 Fri 19-Oct-18 21:31:08

My husband would never post on here. He can’t understand why on Earth I do but he’s not averse to a bit of teasing now and.again
For all of you who have totally perfect husbands that never irritate . Well done.
For all wives on here who never irritate their husbands. Well done.
Both my DH and I have our funny little ways but we love each other and have a very good relationship as, I would imagine, do the others on here who don’t think they are being patronising.

nigglynellie Sat 20-Oct-18 18:35:59

I find it hard to believe that ANYONE here or anywhere else has a perfect husband any more than any husband has a perfect wife!! Neither of us is perfect far from it, but like you Pamela, we understand each other perfectly and rub along just fine!!