Welcome to the new Argy Bar and cafe, abandon hope all ye who enter here.?

Am I who I think I am?
I blame the poteen, we must drink a bit less!
Lurex is compulsary here, we all wear it ( the lurex clique?)
Anyway, am on pernod tonight, just a half pint though please.?

Who are all these bunny girls?

Oh Lemon, what a sad state of affairs (and you have had many ): the Admiral, Big Jim, Wee Wullie, Barry, and many more who wish to remain nameless in case the press get a hold of their names.

We are the dancing girls! Come on Doodle shake that booty!

Some of us are worn out. ( Been busy elsewhere ?)
?????
Anyway, my lurex shorts are a wee bit tight. ?

I'm shaking topsy in fact I've shaken so much my booty is bruised from bouncing on the floor.?
This costume has no support, bits of me are sliding out everywhere.

Those shorts certainly are tight marydoll, they show everything! And I'm not sure at your age you should be doing cartwheels like that ?‍♂️

I wondered what the shiny heap on the floor was. It’s Marydoll after too many cartwheels.

Oh, I'm always " having too many". Cheers! ????
I'm used to it.?

Right! Enough shenanigans from you all and a bit more effort tidying the bar if you please.Somebody needs to bake a few pies for the lunchtime crowd, someone else clean the loos, and someone else needs to hoover these bar carpets they are full of glitter from the lurex.
I shall be helping our German friends ( The Hans) to clean up the cellar ( many Hans make light work) see you all for a
in the bar at 10 a.m. Now get cracking.

Ok I will vacuum. All overall and no knickers, me.

Nanny, do you want your fur coat back? Remember I borrowed it the last time the Fleet were in town.

What's going on? The Argy has gone to pot (snort anyone?) and there are some new names here who I have a sneaky feeling have been here before. Let's all calm down to a pint of poteen each , have a few pork scratchings and have a quick clean up , find that bloody ferret, replace the lock on the ladies loo (again) and kick the admiral out of the cellar(again) and go back to the classy place it has always been(hem hem), first round of drinks on me cos I'm a generous soul

In that case Meno I shall have a double brandy( but do remember the till is there to put money in, not take it out.)

Where are our ferrets?

Nice to see you back meno. Sorry about the lock on the ladies that was my fault. I was inside with one of the Hans' and locked the door to stop him escaping have some privacy. Unfortunately, he broke the door down in his panic to get away the lock broke on our way out

As for the ferrets lemon, they went the same way as my piranhas. ? !!!

Only joking. They are under the sink in the kitchen where I've been feeding them pork scratchings and leftover sandwiches. The garbage disposal stoped working so I thought they could get rid of the leftovers instead

There's a slim chance I put the piranhas down the waste disposal which might be why it's broken, the water was so murky after Marydoll s feet had been in it , I just didn't see them

It's only because the builders are in (Did you know I had the builders in ? ) They keep switching the water off.
I meant to tell you, that the other day I was forced to wash my feet in the poteen.

meno I thought it was bad enough when lemon said she'd flushed them down the loo but to put them through the waste disposal ??? my poor piranha. Not even a chance to wave goodbye ???

I thought that poteen had an unusual cheesy flavour. Not too bad though as I had it with some crisps and pickle. Quite tasty really also those nail clippings added a nice crunch to it.

Ok that's enough, I'm making a new batch of poteen, even I have standards and I have just fished out one of the ferrets so there will only be a few hairs In it

I feel quite queasy now,?

QUITE queasy?! This has got to stop or we shall have public health all over us again. That inspector though ...