Moral dilemma

Agree with MawBroon, it's an entitlement! Take it and it could help make your lives easier in lots of small ways as mentioned above. You could also help out others by giving to charity if that makes you feel better. You never know when situation might change and you could be really be glad to have that little extra set aside.

Attendance Allowance for DH has just started with the first payment at the beginning of January. He has been awarded the higher rate, currently £88.10 per week, paid 4 weekly in arrears, which for us is a HUGE addition to our budget. It will go towards the Gas/electric bills (DH is always cold and has a habit of leaving the outside doors wide open when he goes out. Also pay for a window cleaner, logs, some help with the heavy work in the garden, etc - all the jobs that DH did himself but can no longer do and that I find hard to manage. Also there is a £10 per diem charge for Day Care and around £100 per diem for Respite Care (the care is free this is to cover food etc.)

I feel quite comfortable about accepting this help as we both worked, paid NI and tax and have never had any benefits before. As DH was self employed most of his working life and I had an 8 year break when the DDs were tiny, neither of us has a full state pension nor a works pension, so we have been using savings to balance the budget.

Lucky Girl if you don't take the money there is no guarantee that it will go to someone in more need than yourselves. We know that you would use it sensibly, which is more than we can say about the Government

Granny23 - our circumstances are similar, but tiny pensions as OH had to leave NHS for health reasons at age 42, so lost many years of their pension. I also have only a tiny work pension - and when I say tiny I mean tiny!

We both have a state pension, but both are small for various family reasons. However we have no mortgage to pay, so manage OK on what we have. We don't do expensive things!

I have finished up doing lots of jobs that I did not normally do and this is not easy as I have various painful conditions myself. But being able to pay for a gardener or some of the heavy jobs would be good - e.g. getting the wood in after delivery etc. Also being able to pay for taxis to get OH to appointments would be helpful and give him a bit more independence rather than having to always rely on me. Weighing in at 7 stone means that we spend a very great deal on heating as he is always cold in spite of the many layers of clothes. It would be good to stop thinking about saving fuel and just keep him warm - but what about saving the planet!!??

We do have a small pot of savings, but have them earmarked in case of emergencies and also for funerals! And we do occasionally dip into it for one thing or another.

If the AA comes through I guess carers allowance would also apply.

The Treasury doesn't have coffers. It has a permanent deficit, and an ever-increasing borrowing requirement. Your not claiming may reduce the overall burden a tiny amount. It won't free up resources that can then go to someone more deserving. Government money doesn't work like that!

Take it. Save it up...you have contributed to these benefits for other people to have. We are quite comfortably off... not rich.,, we use ours to pay for help in house and garden, painting, weeding...things my husband would be doing if he was well. Also I am full time carer for my husband but as I have a pension can't claim carer's allowance so I may use some of this to pay for a cleaner. Also you probably need more heating the list is endless how much more it is to have someone who is disabled in the house....I mean this nicely.

I would suggest taking what he is entitled to,& put it to some good cause of your own choice. If you don't take ,it has no chance of going to a good cause .

But what lovely people you are to think about it?

Take it Luckygirl. Annsixty is doing exactly the right thing. Use it to make your lives a bit less stressful. Employ a Cleaner or Gardner or pay someone to sit with dh whilst you go out for a couple of hours. Pay for online deliveries or cooked meals delivered to your home if you need it. A pub near us cooks and delivers their main meal options and they are nice as well and just need reheating in microwave. If you don't claim it they can't give it to someone else who really needs it. My Mum never claimed anything and she was entitled to non means tested benefits but was too proud to accept it.

Carers allowance is not available after retirement but, as I said upthread, you might be eligible for Pension Credit of some sort. You should also have a Carer's Assessment and you might be awarded a yearly amount to spend on something specific. It's only a small amount (£250?) but may be worth it.

Sorry, I don't know why but I quoted AA at a rate of £88.10 per week but it is in fact £82.10.

I don’t think it matters whether you need it financially or that you have paid into the system. What matters is whether someone qualifies for it. It’s non means tested, non contribution based for a reason - to help meet the extra financial costs of disability ( goodness knows there are plenty of other costs that are non financial). I agree 100% with janea

Another one who thinks that logically there is no dilemma. It is not charity, we all pay into the tax system one way or another and are all entitled to whatever is due. The fact that the 'insurance' is from the government is no different from if it was Aviva or another insurance company. I think that because we hear so much about the benefit system we feel that it is not like other insurance but it is, it is not discretionary.

I cannot see the dilemma. The person eligible for benefits will have been earning a reasonable wage and be paying their taxes which are contributing to the payment of universal benefits. This belief in universal entitlement to benefits forms the foundations of the welfare state.

Some benefits are means tested which is done on an objective and transparent manner. Once we start to ordinary people deciding who is 'morally' entitled to claim certain benefits and who is not we will be descending into systems that in other circumstances lead to McCarthyism and the Salem witch trials, neighbours reaching judgements on neighbours with insufficient or incorrect information, the sick and ill afraid to claim benefits because of what the neighbours will think.

No thank you, if you are entitled to a benefit claim it. That is what it is there for.

I will put in the claim now!! I can see many ways in which it might make our lives easier.

It does seem to be a unanimous “Take it’’!

YES.

Yes, claim it, and use it for all the things which could be made easier for you. Once you begin to think of things you struggle with, you'll realise you can put it to good use.

Claim it and if you don’t use it add it to your savings. I’m saying this as I’m in a similar situation to Alygran, my DH died after claiming for 2 months and now, a year later, my income has reduced considerably as I am too young for a state pension and only got bereavement benefit for a year.

Another point Lucky is that if you claim the money and spend it on services like cleaning or gardening, you are effectively employing someone and actually putting the money back into the economy.
Possibly even better than giving it to charity.

go for it..you deserve it! and if it fails....appeal.

If I was entitled to it, I would claim it. If you were wealthy, I might think differently but as you say you are only"ticking along", why should you not claim it?

Having watched a Panorama programme about the total lack of monitoring of people who file for bankruptcy and who claim to have no assets (but are actually living the life of riley), I don't see why the average person should have qualms about doing something perfectly legal and claiming what they are entitled to.

Just be aware that by claiming assistance to which you are entitled this can have the later effect of unlocking other doors which may prove to be a blessing further down the line.
We have claimed and so are able to relax a little on heating costs and pay for a home help, cleaner, gardener and a taxi if I am unable to drive. Nothing major but it certainly takes the pressure off the continual grind as none of these things are a one off. I also pay for supplements, essential oils and good food to keep us well and thereby perhaps not taking up a bed needed by someone else.

Lucky I think you should take it. As Maw says it’s an entitlement. You don’t know what’s around the corner that the money might be needed for. Obviously I hope nothing is!

Just on the taxi element of your ongoing costs Lucky - I assume you are aware of community and volunteer transport which can work out much cheaper and is manned by volunteers like my DH who are much more likely to be able to cope with someone like your DH. Their mileage rate (which is usually not charged for hospital visits) is usually very low.

DH takes people to appointments and then waits for them to come out so there are no slip ups.

You perhaps need an 'assessment' of physical ability first done by the chariry. DH drives for RVS but AgeUk do it I think as do other charities and community groups.

I heard of someone who was regularly paying £15 taxi fare to a commercial company which was less than £5 when booked through one of the above!

I also think you should take it, good luck