Things that I have started and REALLY must stop!

phoenix the beans and peas are sulking because it's just too cold for them, poor dears.

Perhaps I should be a bit kinder when I talk to them.

I'm sure I've seen a New Scientist article lately that claimed only the brightest people talk to their cats :D

We no longer have animals but I talk to myself a lot and swear and am then ambarrassed if I think the neighbours might have heard. If my DH makes any comment, I tell him off for listening to my private conversation.

Even if I don't talk out loud, I constantly mouth or whisper to myself and occasionally do it when I am out, which is embarrassing, but I just hope people think I'm a techy and talking into a hidden mobile phone.

I talk to rooms 'what did I come in here for'?
Often when in the supermarket I am
grumling chatting to who I think is DH only to find it's a complete stranger, DH has wondered off and I've put my shopping in someone else's trolley.

DH is the one who is often reminded by moi that he is grumbling at an imamate object!
Or he can shout or whinge at other drivers as much as he likes, but they CANT hear him!
But I can

I think I'm more aware of others peoples foibles
I can't ask DH about mine as he will probably spend the morning pointing them out

I do all these things, phoenix, and we both talk to the cat incessantly. I have no intention of stopping. The car thing is annoying, Cherrytree59, especially as it doesn't change anything, except the atmosphere. My DH always wants to know why there's a hold-up, traffic jam etc. even though knowing doesn't help.

I share many valuable opinions with my cat who is a very knowledgeable listener. He was home educated of course which contributes to his wide knowledge of many aspects of (my) life!

Most of the above but always shouting at the things that beep when they're finished (bread maker, microwave, dishwasher) or when you leave them open (fridge, freezer). "I'm getting their as quickly as my plaster will let me!"/"Shut up I'm still getting stuff out of you!".

Ah well, this has amused me and caused my husband to excuse himself from never listening to me! Apparently I talk to every thing, from the dogs, to the rooms I enter to the Computer I might be using. Nothing is safe from my verbal onslaught, I even chat to the glasses I'm about to prop up on my head ask ing them to stay there.

Oh, Phoenix I well understand your treatment of the vacuum cleaner.
Something I really must do is sort out the garden shed. After putting the lawn mower back I accidentally knocked a bamboo stick from its moorings (I'd placed it atop a part of the shed to act as a 'hanging' pole for a bucket containing trowels, weeders, etc) and obviously it was never meant to be a permanent fixture. I got very annoyed, swore at it (calling it an 'effing w...', put it back and then stupidly slammed the door in a temper - which dislodged the wretched item again - I haven't felt like going back in there yet.

chewbacca you must be my long lost twin

Oh yes, the throat humming! Do it all the time, not just when I'm cooking . I will notice my DD glance up at me as I pass by and I quickly realise I'm doing it and stop, only for it to start again, totally involuntarily, 10 seconds later.
I talk to machines, mostly when they're annoying me. "Yes, OK, I'm coming, shut yer face!", or "Do you really have to beep TEN times? Don't you think that's a bit excessive?" I once shouted at a twin tub washing machine (used some pretty ripe language, actually) and threw it out of the back door, full of water. Well, it wasn't full once it was out there of course...
If I drop something, knock something over, spill liquid - you know, that sort of thing - it's usually met with something like "Oh thank you so much. That's EXACTLY what I wanted to happen!"
DH knows when to retreat to another room and keep quiet

You are so polite Indinina. I'm afraid I just swear!

Indinana

Can usually find my glasses on top of my head. Reached up and found not there, continued fruitless search of house- turned out I was wearing them.

Yes I shout at the beeping machine ad in ' Yes, I know, I heard you, no need to keep on and on!' Or even 'Shut up will you!' Which Ive been known to shout when on the phone to someone and had to ecplain it wasn't them I meant

Or even explain!

And I alway grunt when standing up which yhe GC mimic sometimes!

Apparently I whistle to myself, much to the amusement of my family

When my car beeps to tell me that I have left the lights on I always say 'thank you'.

I remember many, many years ago taking DS1 (who will be 39 in August ) to the local shop "on foot" rather than in the buggy.

I still can recall his little face, gazing up at me with a look of confusion and bewilderment as we reached the kerb to cross the road and I firmly ordered him to SIT

In my defence, I was used to him being in the buggy, and the dog trotting beside me.

I'm right there with you both! I talk regularly to the sewing machine, computer, printer, and the annoying beeping timer on my otherwise marvellous oven.

I also carry on long conversations with both my cats, although I still miss their predecessor who was more academically minded and given to long philosophical discussions, or an even earlier cat who commented upon both my degree theses and regularly joined me in reading the scriptures in Latin or Hebrew. She even rent newspaper with her claws at every mention of Hamman (the bad guy in the book of Esther) thus carrying on the tradition that allows Jewish children to stamp and wave wooden rattles during the Purim reading of the book of Esther.
So you are not alone or mad

Sadly I no longer have a cat to converse with, Dearest Moggie having gone to the Great Mouse Hunt some years ago.
I content myself with ranting at people on the TV. I have been very rude indeed during the recent election.
It's a good job the TV. can't report what I have said to it, as I should probably be locked up for a long time!

You think it can report what you have said SG Actually I wish it could report the times I switch people off.

You are so polite Indinina
Haha, my family would laugh their flippin' socks off if they read that Bella

hellsbells, I've done that too. Same with hats! The funniest time was when I was on a bryophyte searching party (they let me tag along) and, after we'd had our picnic lunch I was faffing about looking everywhere for my glasses, and saying I can't find my glasses. People looked a bit awkward and then someone brave said, "Um. You are wearing some glasses."