AIBU re MCR collection?

I think the concert probably has to go ahead soon after the event. We are all still reeling from the horror of that night. But sadly memories are short, and I think that any fundraising that takes place too long after the event just wouldn't have the same impact. Awful to say - but leave it too long, and there will likely be another atrocity that will be the focus of public attention.

I don't like "slebs" being pilloried for wanting to take part. A pop/rock concert would be a bit of a flop without some pop/rock performers taking part. George Michael always used to take part in events like these - and let's not forget the news of all the quiet charitable acts he performed that only became news after his death. We don't know what "slebs" do behind the scenes so I don't think they should be belittled for offering their services. Yes they will get publicity for it, but they can't really perform incognito.

But as to the point of Jane10's OP - I am in complete agreement. Raising money "to help Manchester" is very vague, isn't it? Help Manchester how, exactly?

I don't want to seem heartless (although it's likely to come across this way), but how does the loss of a child impact financially on a family, other than funeral costs? I can understand the financial impact of an adult who is a main financial contributor to the family, but a child wouldn't have that contribution. No amount of money donated to a family that has suffered the unimaginable loss of a child is going to compensate them.

I do like the suggestions above that the money should be channelled towards counselling provision for those affected, because those services are grossly underfunded at the moment, or towards good quality prosthetic limbs if they are needed, or especially a multi faith/multi cultural park where children can come together in acceptance of each other.

I am all in favour of raising money to help in situations such as these, but I don't think it's unreasonable to know where the money is being aimed. Too often we hear about unscrupulous "top dogs" in the care of these funds, and one can't help but wonder how much is being creamed off in "administration" expenses.

I think Ariane Grande has said that she will fund the funerals

I am not sure but I would have thought funding would be available when dreadful events like this happen.
Government money is often channelled through charities too.

Actually, I don't think Ariana Grande HAS said she will fund the funerals. This seems to have been mentioned on a "run for" celebrity facebook/twitter account, and not her own "official" account.

Perhaps they could give some of the money to the families who were in the subsequent bombing in Kabul...50 killed and hundreds dead but barely a mention in the media. Although Manchester was terrible, the same fanatics are causing mayhem around the world and we carry on in blissful ignorance til our own get hurt. Definite grumpy old woman moment!

I agree giving money to bereaved families does not help UNLESS they are now orphans as some of these children are and also some have lost a parent which may lead to financial difficulties. For those with "life changing injuries" this money could help towards treatment and any equipment they might need

You have raised what a lot of people are probably thinking it needs to be made a lot clearer what the money is needed and going to be used for

The Red Cross site states that if more money than is deemed necessary is raised surplus is distributed to similar causes. Some injured, children and the scaffolder mentioned, will need help for years. Mentally and physically.

Slightly off topic but if everyone who laid flowers, tributes, balloons, cuddly toys etc. at the site gave the money instead then quite a lot would have been raised. I don't understand this trend at all!

HurdyGurdy I heard it on the BBC or ITV news (can't remember which) but it could be wrong. I don't do twitter so it can't have been there.

I have given to appeals for Manchester. Its purely a personal choice. I am, as well as being a mother, grandmother a carer to two young ladies 18 and 23 with learning disabilities. My DGS is 8. This atrocity resonated with me as It could have been my young people. I was so thankful that day that my family were safe , yet heartbroken for the victims and their families.

Magrithea I agree. I can understand why someone may want to do it but I have always thought it rather pointless.
Someone will have to clear them all away - will they be unwrapped and composted to provide soil for more living plants?
Probably not.

Don't understand why people think money won't help the Manchester victims! I can only presume you don't have to struggle on a low income. First of all there is the cost of a funeral, many of the victims have life changing injuries. They will need financial support to cover the cost of their recovery,it may be wheelchairs, or alterations to their homes. I'm shocked at the reaction on here!

I feel same as you magrithia I know flowers are lovely but the money saved on them would have raised quite a lot of money . On news today flowers are to be moved . Wouldn't it be better to take a single flower and have collection boxes around they could be descrite

In the end you choose who you give money to . It can't be everyone and anyone what ever the cause
People who collect money in such a personal upfront manner need to learn this and be more polite .
I have had this happen to me and decided that i would no longer give to a charity that uses bullying tactics

I was talking to my partner about this very idea yesterday. I don't see how money can help, unless a breadwinner has been killed and the family cannot afford things they need. Or if someone's injuries can be helped by treatment not available on the NHS. Those who have lost children, I imagine would feel horror and guilt at enrichment as a result of the child's death. It won't take the pain and grief away. There does seem to be an outpouring of public grief which I find confusing. Yes, I cried at some of the stories I heard: it was a terrible event, but I have a little niggle of doubt about the ostentatious way in which the public grief is expressed.

I agree with Jane.
I feel deeply for the families of the people so cruelly snatched away, but why do they deserve such extra help?
For example, do we do this for the families of children and others who are killed in everyday road traffic collisions?
OK, there is sometimes local support, or a 'Just Giving' page set up, but nothing big and certainly nothing official. And certainly children who lose a parent in tragic circumstances are not given any financial assistance for ongoing psychological trauma (I know this from the experience of a friend whose husband was killed).
I'm not being heartless when I say that there will be plenty of support for people in our rich, stable country. What about the thousands of children orphaned, limbless and traumatised in Syria, Liberia, the Congo, Iraq? - the list seems endless.
People need to show their concern and sadness for Manchester, I understand that. I will give some extra money to Save the Children in their memory, as it is the children around the world who need our help.

vonnie everyone here agrees that people will need help woth all the things you mention.
People would just like to know exactly where their money is going. Not an unfare request when you think of all the cunning little s***s out there who would happily pocket anything they collected.
I would be very wary of someone collecting to help XYZ if they couldn't show proof.

I have been thinking the same on the last few all the people involved will receive compensation from the criminal injuries board to cover cost of funerals I don't understand why this other money is needed as nothing can compensate for the loss of a loved
I will duck now but it strikes me as profiting from loved ones

Vonnie1, I fully understand that IMMEDIATE money is a help (necessity even) for those caught up in tragedies like Manchester. However....... what often happens with donations is that they go into a common fund and lie there until official/formal decisions are made as to how and when disbursement is established. This often involves lawyers and slow slow procedures. That's why I wondered, in an earlier post, if anyone had knowledge of any 'instant' government aid. I do believe there could be many ancient disaster funds still in exsistence and being 'managed' whilst those originally involved could make use of the cash and wind up the account.

If the money helps families with funerals, and the injured get help for the future, then that is ecceptable,I like to know where the money is going.
Also about the flowers, tributes etc, sometimes it seems "over the top" in Stockholm where there were people killed/injured a few weeks ago, there were flowers laid for weeks, in fact they have just been removed, the money instead of flowers, could have been used in another way, being honest the florists dont do so badly! I wonder what the comments will be now!

Definitely not just you. I've often thought the same when people claim compensation for the death of a child in other circumstances. I used to work for a Solicitor and said the same to him. I was told that "it could help pay for a holiday to help them forget." FORGET??!! I don't think so. The only circumstances I can think of when it's justified is if extra expense is incurred, through, for instance the loss of a breadwinner, visits to hospital (including parking) and such.

I agree with your post ninathenana

Unfortunately there are always unscrupulous people who will take advantage of even such a tragic event as this to make - steal - money.

Two of the young children who were killed were local to us, and most of the homes in our village are displaying pink and yellow ribbons in support of their families.

Such a tragedy to happen, and everyone (including Ariana Grande, along with other stars) are giving their time to do a concert in Manchester this weekend to show support.

Although money raised can never replace loved ones, it might help to ease the families' way through the minefield of emotions and problems that they must be going though now and in the future.

Bionicsoman I understand your post I often think about how one life ' appears' so much more valuable than another and why ? I truely feel for those poor kids in Manchester the families it's unimmaginable but the little kids in Syria are living it daily it's not an argument for or against just saying in my head all victims everywhere should have a similar level of sorrow and care and empathy
I'm guessing when something hits an unexpected place and there are mass injuries and deaths it appears more of a tragedy and it's everyone's sticking plaster to make themselves feel better to buy flowers or give money

Personally, I wouldn't let anyone pack my bags in a supermarket but I can't understand why some people here are saying money won't help those affected in Manchester. Families may have lost a wage earner and so the surviving parent (if there was one) will need to pay for childcare as well as cover the lost salary. Families could be visiting children in hospital for months with all the costs that entails- time off work/petrol/parking. Then there's associated costs afterwards, maybe conversions to their homes to accommodate wheelchairs etc. Someone suggested a park; that's not going to help them nor is giving to other causes abroad.

I would never give a penny to Foreign Aid charities. The government already gives £25,000,000 A DAY of taxpayers' money to that cause. Actually, that's incorrect, it borrows the money to allow it to do that!