The Gransnet Olympics !

CharleyGirl, my version sound much more interesting.

Nankate, I failed in the stopping 3/6 year olds knocking 7 bells out of each other. But I'm training for the bandaging 3/6 year olds.

It's like ww3 here

Can I compete in the 'Whipping Off An Uncomfortable Bra' contest? I have had LOADS of practise and I feel I would definitely win a gold. Might not jump up and down in triumph though - that would not be a good look!!

Is there a eating chocolate brownies event? I am practising. Of course I may be a bit late for this Olympics which leaves me with 4years of dedicated work ahead. I've given up on the procrastination team it still hasn't managed to get itself organised!

Dannierae, if you are in need of a personal trainer for you event, I could manage to fit you into my schedule.

DanniRae, shush with the bra talk! GandTea's just coming round from his medication - he had to be sedated by the medics after the mixed breast stroke.

I must apologise to the entire squad for my disqualification from the over-60s-relay-medley-but-mainly-dog-paddle-with-swimming-aids event. I think I'd have got away with the extra fingers if it hadn't been for the newly sprouting additional webbed toes. That axle grease has a lot to answer for

It's good to see that the Monty Python hundred yard dash for people with no sense of direction has been revived though. DH and I could be favourites for this event (though the webbing might be a bit of a handicap in my case).

www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYvbaqfq9mI

What is our target for medals? Will we be near? Need to make sure we keep our sponsorship for the next 4 years. All the sherry drinking and brownie eating doesn't come cheap and obviously much practice will be needed.

Please can someone remind me when it is the closing ceremony, I missed the opening and it would be nice to at least make one of them. Also are we having the flag at the top of the page and is there anyone with enough strength left to carry it?

Thanks Gandtea for your thoughtful offer but I must decline.

Sorry Maggiemaybe - I wasn't thinking! It won't happen again - we don't want Gandtea needing more medication.

trisher there is another week to go but I am not 100% certain when the closing ceremony is. The procrastinators were supposed to organise that but knowing that lot we will still be here at Christmas. I would not mind, provided that the weather is warmer than our country.

Are we having a post Olympics party? I can bring a very nice sherry trifle and fondant fancies. ??

The procrastinators are considering the matter very carefully, So far they have come up with the idea of having a committee to organise things. The committee are now discussing the exact parameters of their duties and responsibilities. Once they have reached agreement they will move on to other things, but don't hold your breath!

Re the closing ceremony....whenever it is.....let's at least get OUR flag the right way up!

I was considering the garden kick about with GS event, but after an unfortunately placed kick on goal, I am now nursing my OO's with an ice pack.

I wondered about a "leading innocent threads into arguments and insults event", but then I thought better of it. Mumsnetters would take all the golds, we might just make silver.
The procrastinators think they may not manage a closing ceremony for this event but are thinking about one in 4 years time. They suggest everybody just hangs out, brings their medals and an alcoholic beverage of choice, then no-one will care which way up the flag is.

I have been attempting the "trying all the AA batteries lying around the house to see whether they make it work" but I don't think I am in for a medal. Practice doesn't make perfect in this event. I'll have to rethink my technique, possibly try the "two buses to B&Q" maneuvre. Or maybe the "move some from the kitchen scales" would be effective.

I am the proud owner of the 'cant navigate her way out of a paper bag event' having twice in the last few weeks directed DH to a wrong wedding venue and a wrong hospital involving two dashes across countryside and a city at breakneck speed.
Must wear specs more often when reading things.

I would win a sleeping contest hands down. I am definitely gold medal material and that is without alcohol!

I think I will get silver Charleygirl as we have looked after our 5 and 3 year old GSs all day

The GN Olympics are drawing to a close but I expect a last big effort from you all to up our medals, join in some extra events and generally be jolly good eggs. Any suggestions for an event or two not yet participated in ?

Elegran I swear by the 'move them around a bit and something might happen' manoeuvre but it isn't 100% reliable and I don't think it will win any medals.

Still thrashing around in the pool, several proper swimmers have been, won their medals and gone. They did shout a bit when I got in the way in the deep end (that Phelps chappie is a bit scary) but he just ploughed on and won anyway.

Jalima it is so frustrating when somebody like Michael Phelps, who lets face it, is only marginally faster than us, can get so many gold medals. Did he not give a thought to folk like yourself floundering? Could he not have helped you?

The thing was, Charleygirl, you would have thought he would sink to the bottom with the weight of all those gold medals he had around his neck. No, he shouted something that sounded like 'Oh, duck' when he saw me in his lane.
He still won!

It was more likely to be "Good luck", Jalima. How kind of him.

S'ok, trisher I've broken my training brick wall. Two of them still in a cardboard pack turned out to be new and not just old ones stuffed back in the box.

Maggiemaybe
He didn't look very kind, I got the Phelps Scowl