Any tips for coping with getting older?

Perhaps you should tell them that when they talk about family things in which you're not included, you feel left out. Not easy, I know, but it does sound as if they are being a bit insensitive and need to know.

I did, just before Christmas .

Were you able to say it at the time though, Tegan - for example, they were chatting about their plans to meet up and spend time with A and B family members - did you feel able to say, "Oh, that sounds nice - can I join you?"

No; it was a telephone conversation and they were telling me how everyone was going to have a meal at a pub and then go on to a country park that was all lit up for Christmas and I burst into tears and said I felt that I was somehow paying for the failure of my marriage. That's when I was told that I could go and watch television with them on Christmas afternoon if I wanted to.

I remember that now, Tegan. A very poor second-best. . What is it about us that we must always look for approval? First of all, it was from our parents and now it's from our children. I really only get to see DS and his partner when I go along on alternate Fridays and Sundays to pick up and take back her little boys to their father who lives a few miles away. If I didn't do that, I don't think I'd have much excuse/reason to visit! As I mentioned before, this doesn't bother me too much, really. I think I've developed a thick skin.
However, I do find myself getting annoyed, and vow I'm not going to remain so available..... then the phone rings, or I get a text.....'Mum....could you....?' And I do....

Same here. I sometimes have fantasies about running away from home, but I can't cause of the dog. I sound such a misery don't I . This weather doesn't help; plus the masses of weight I've put on and the fact that I can't get out of the house much because of moving stuff around so the carpet fitter has a floor to fit the carpets on. I need some sun and exercise!

Hugs to you Tegan. Thank you for your kind words KatyK and for the flowers too, they made me happy. No one on here whinges, what we can cope with one day we can't on another.

My daughter has banned me from her wedding this September because she told me that I wasn't taking any part in it and I got upset so she said not to go at all. I am not doing. Not just because of this but other things too. But after being a single parent for most of her life and a single granny to her sons, she doesn't see her dad and his parents are dead, then I feel that I should have had some part in her wedding, not even a speech or walking her in to the venue, nothing. They can be hurtful at times.

My son has just screamed at me again awful words after a conversation about him going seeing a Think Positive counsellor. The counsellor has discharged him after one session. Terrible. My son is screaming inside because of his dad abandoning him but I am the one who cops out because of it.

I spoke to my mum who is bedridden today. I am seeing my dad tomorrow who has dementia as a solicitor is coming to sort out the lasting power of attorney and his will. The black dog will not be far away if I do not do something about taking all this stress on.

That is why I say that we have to think for ourselves, to look after ourselves and to do small things that make a difference to us. Watching Corrie cheered me up today. Having a salad will cheer me up tomorrow. I've lost 4lb this week, so only another 5 stone to go!

I am going to go to Dunelm Mill on Saturday and buy another teddy bear throw but in a bigger size this time so that I can cuddle right up into it as my doggie has claimed the smaller one. They are gorgeous and fluffy and snuggly. So that is a small treat to look forward to and it will get me out of the house on a day that my -darling- son is at home. Oh, he also said that the world is black and white and there is no grey in any aspect of our lives. According to him everything can be sorted one way or the other. The voice of a teenager while he knows everything!

Oh ruby. That's awful about the wedding. You have a lot to put up with.

Thanks KatyK having my friends on here keep me sane, so thank you to all.

Well we are now halfway through our week of looking after our 2 GC and surviving not too badly. Although it has been literally non stop for the both of us. We sat (flopped) down last night in front of the telly and within 5 minutes DH was snoring his head off! So we decided to call it a day and were both in bed at 8!. I think we had forgotten how exhausting it is looking after children all day. The 6 month old baby is a dream but obviously needs constant changing and feeding. The 4 year old is a little more demanding to say the least and needs to be kept occupied all the time.

We went for an outing today to a local café with an outdoor playground and it was like a military operation the amount of stuff we had to take with us. I have no idea how some older women who have babies later in life by IVF manage to cope. I wish I had half the amount of energy that I had 20 years ago.