Saints

How about St Uncumber? She's the patron saint of unhappy wives and will get rid of their husbands. I think she grew a beard overnight to repel her unwanted suitors. But I don't think she's a canonical saint.

Oh go for the piles one! You could nickname him St Anusol.

Or St Fiery Ar*e

How about St.Catherine, Patron Saint of Spinsters (not many of those on Gransnet, I imagine)
St.Catherine's chapel in Dorset is lovely, standing in isolation on a hillside,
and contains the following poem.-
A husband, St.Catherine,
A handsome one, St.Catherine,
A rich one, St.Catherine,
A nice one, St.Catherine.
And soon, St.Catherine.

henetha would love to know where that chapel is. Would love to visit there. And take DD2 .

Some years since I was there, j08, but I think it's not far from Abbotsbury,
where the swannery is. It really is worth a visit, being in such a lovely spot on a hillside. It is definitely south Dorset.
I am useless at posting links on here, but if you type 'St.Catherine's Chapel in Dorset' into Google, I imagine it will give you all the information you need.
Good luck, I hope you make it.

St Bernard, him of the pass.

And the dog

That one has already been written Mishap,jingle and Ana

Johnny Cash - Ring of Fire

I suspect St. Christopher has been written about but as so many of us travel so much, he would be good for a Gransnetter.

Also,St.Francis is very well known, being the patron saint of animals, but such a lovely saint to write a poem about.

George, patriotic

This list might help you choose Mishap. I have my own particular favourite.

listverse.com/2007/10/12/top-10-unusual-patron-saints/

If you want a serious suggestion I'd go either for St Hilda of Whitby who in 649 became Abbess of Whitby, a double house of monks and nuns over which she ruled wisely for 22 years. Or, given your interest in music, Hildegarde of Bingen, she is a Doctor of the Church, a very learned and wise woman, a philosopher, mystic and distinguished composer. She also wrote botanical works and medicinal texts and supervised exquisite miniature illuminations. Right up your street, I would say.

Who fed and watered Kevin while he did this? How did he go to the toilet? Wouldn't he have had to keep his hand still until the hatchlings fledged?
Not the most believable of saints' stories, but at least it isn't gruesome.

St Catherine never existed. Maybe you could work that into your poem!

I did a couple of poetry writing courses a few years ago. I wrote a lot at the time but now the muse seems to have left me.

Yes miceElf Hildegard of Bingen was one of my thoughts. I will keep looking.

I still think the piles one is funny. Is that just my childish mind?

During my strict Catholic upbringing I was always particularly fascinated
by two saints. St Don Bosco, an Italian priest who dedicated his life to
helping and education street children in the 1800s and St Therese of Lisieux who entered the Carmelite order of nuns, also in the 1800s. I don't know why these two in particular, as there were many saints held up as examples to us in those days.

I always thought St. Fiacre was the patron saint of gardening but then maybe that should be St. Alan?

Perhaps sitting on his cold garden bench had given him piles.

merlot!

I've got several bits of music composed by H of B