Oh no!

We dined with friends once and had a very pleasant meal, to go with which the wife opened a bottle of red wine that her son had brought back for them from a holiday in Portugal. She said as she poured it "I don't know quite what it is but it looks and smells nice"

It was very nice. Delicious. Went a treat with the food. We passed back our glasses for refills and emptied them, then had a look at the label for a name so that we could find some more.

It was a good port that we were sloshing back like cheap Chianti..

Wonderfu!

Back in the eighties, a neighbouring farm was bought by a city slicker who had made a packet on the futures exchange and fancied 'escaping to the country'. He and his wife invited us to Sunday lunch so we set off across the fields (I didn't want to have to drive as bloody usual )

We didn't realise until later that his wife was a heavy drinker. She had been sent to his extensive wine cellar to bring up a bottle of Chateau God Knows What so that it could 'breathe'. He poured a glass as we were about to tuck into rather overcooked roast beef and passed it to me obviously expecting me to do the Jilly Goolden routine. I took a sip and said, 'Lovely....tastes like port.' His expression went from patronising to sheer panic.

I have no idea how valuable the lovely, lip smacking port was but it was a lunch to remember and we weren't invited back!!

As a port lover, I sympathise!

Have a nice drink to make you feel better

Look on the bright side - they could all have gone!

We have been drinking it but it's not knock it back stuff. Almost four case have been drunk over the years. We tend to keep it until we have loved and valued guests and have given some as present to much loved (very much loved) friends.

Sodding cats! No stroking and ear scratching for you guys tonight!

Oh, absent that would have really p....d me off.
You could have started to drink it from 1996!!
Lesson: Don't save stuff for best........., what best?

Greatnan Do you know the story of the poor man who dropped his bread and it fell butter side up? So he searched the world in search of a wise man who would tell him how this extraordinary phenomenon of how a poor man's bread could possibly fall butter side up. Eventually, he climbed a massively high mountain and had to wait months before he could speak to the wise man.

"I humbly ask you, Oh wise man, tell me how could a poor man's bread fall butter side up?"

There was a long pause and then the wide men drew in a breath.

"You buttered the bread on the wrong side."

I think NfkDumpling sums it up, 'The Moral of this Story is..'up rack

S**t! Best stock the wine rack right up so there's no space and nothing fall through. Either that or drink it.

....why is my nose growing ....

Have you seen the film 'The Angel's Share' absent? If not [and without giving to much of the story away] breaking one of the bottles of port means that the rarity value of the other two will now go up, so they'll be worth more. [I'm not entirely sure that this will, in fact happen, but I thought it might cheer you up a bit]...

The same law which says your toast will always fall buttered-side down!
Many commiserations, just keeping inhaling the fumes.

Oh absent I feel your pain! (not that anything drinkable stays here long enough) but I believe that as to your question as to "why" it can only be put down to Sods Law.