How odd, and definitely no fun

my friend bought a tin of curry from the local cheap shop that had instructions for warming in the hot sun?? could be a long wait.

A lawnmower – not suitable for human consumption.

Many years a go I used to go to green grocers that advertised "oboes" I' m afraid it took me a while to work it out, as I was young and had never seen an aubergine, they didn't have many iin my part of Scotland when I was growing up..

When my colleague and I used to go to London for meetings, I was always amused by the sign on the escalator that said "Dogs must be carried"

What do you do if you haven't got one?

I used to like the one advertising a local event, "Live Machine Knitting".

Yes, or any other performance advertised as 'live'. What's the alternative?

I've always wondered about 'Disabled Car Parks' how did they get that way?

I still smile when I think of a sign I saw outside a seaside theatre. It advertised a performance by Chas and Dave (blast from the past) but underneath in small print it said "not the original Dave". I am laughing even as I type this - is it just me?

No - not just you, wisewoman!

At one time disabled parking spaces were labelled 'Invalid Parking Only' - My young daughter wondered why it was o.k. to park invalidly.

Oh Alieoxen I just couldn"t stop laughing about the 2nd part of your post _ the couscous , just loved it

It was probably Arabic to start with I think, translated....

How about 'This Door is Alarmed'.

What upset it?

I've read about signs on front gates 'Beware of the dog: the cat has a bad attitude too'

Oh yes alie - lovely.
the poor cod, battered and the much luckier prunes, stoned...
ASDA fizzy water is astoundingly cheap, and you will be glad to know that it it "good for hydration"