ET & RB

oxonim mortally offended! I'm going off in a huff!
(actually to get

jeni there's lots of chilled vodka wine in the fridge - I'll stick with you!

I always thought of a huff as being a small hairy bag...no insult intended now either....

I could be the carpet, (I've been a doormat in a previous life)

butter you might as well be cleo as you are sticking with jeni

anyone seen when or she still on the casting couch?

oh nanna

She's probably still concocting an alibi for harming Donald!

Where's the storyline?

How did she get back into the country without detection?

white - To be cleo I'd have to be v. v. squiffy - Mmmmm - sounding good! .......but it depends who RB is!

Can we keep that dog out of this and get to the story?

well it's jeni as far as I am aware

Mmwah! We'll make lovely pair!

,,,,,(closes audition room door).....er...could someone get an ambulance, please? I think Mr Producer has just had a heart attack! those springs in that couch have seen better days

I think we will need a team for costumes. Whoever makes Cleo's costume will need to make sure that she can fit her asp into it.

Blimey you must have a well paid part then when well done

And the rest of her?

Have a look here:
www.barnorama.com/women-who-played-cleopatra/
.....Anyone fancy looking like one of these instead?

mamie he's only a little asp sort of terrier sized

Can I be a belly dancer? I've got the red sequined bra and wrap around skirt that shimmies when you shake your hips !!! I've only worn it once so it's in good condition

Of course you can. Just practise the belly wobble for now and it will all be alright on the night.
I think the dance can be much more free-form than the can-can.

Well maybe a bit more complicated than that. There seem to be three movements; the shiver or shimmy; hip hits; and undulations which are meant to represent the movement of riding a camel.
Are you with me so far?

....(on the phone to A and E) ...loud shrieks.....

What do you mean, he's DEAD!?
Have you tried CPR?
Can you check in his pocket to see if there's a contract - he wants me to sign it now.
Yes, I do mean right now!
Did he say anything? Did he say when is my muse - she must have the best part?

...slams phone down..... oh, f**k off, then - I'll find another producer

when how come you go from disaster to disaster First an attempt to incinerate a poor defenceless dog now you have actually managed to s....g someone to death

See what I mean! That woman is a born killer!

I didn't do the dog thing, and unfortunately Mr Producer had a dicky ticker - how was I to know?