Crossing bridges before you come to them?

I'll be 66 in August and I already find looking after a fairly large Edwardian house (particularly the garden) hard. I would love to downsize (although I do wake up at night worrying about it) my problem, however, is that my 29 year old son and his partner live with me (the modern day youth problem due to high rents in London).I am still undecided about whether I want to move or not - there are no smaller houses in the locality so it would mean moving out of the area. It occupies a lot of my thoughts and does tend to make me feel anxious.

I'd say start looking now and get your husband gradually used to the concept. Although none of us can predict the future for sure, we can have contingency plans.
Like you I lived in a house with lots of outside steps which were steep and awful in icy weather. I now live in an apartment with a big balcony, very close to lots of amenities. I can recommend it.
No matter the time of life, change can be fun and open up all sorts of new possibilities. I wish you good luck and best wishes for possible new horizons and the joy of friends old and new.

Oh I wish it was possible to edit posts. I see you've been looking for 3 years.Sorry! Fine detail was never my strong point. Keep looking, and I hope you find somewhere that suits you both - your instincts seem right to me.

We too are looking to move. Our house and garden are small and manageable but the area is going down so its value will do also.

If you are absolutely sure you can't adapt your present home then I agree with the others here who recommend moving while you are still in good health.

It is hard to move if you love the house you're in so make sure that any new home you buy will also be somewhere you can love.

Good luck.

After having been very ill aged 60 my family suggested that I moved nearer one of them. I decided to move nearer my younger daughter. I retired from my work and moved then. I am now 75 and it was the best thing I have done. I drive round the busy city, look after my 3 grandchildren when needed, do school pickup and 9 months ago rescued my beautiful Westie. Its the best thing I ever did at the right time too. I have so much joy and freedom that would not have been possible if I have left it untilo now to move. Make the move when you are well enough to do it and can decide for your self rather than when you have to and have no choice at all.

When in doubt, do nothing.

Have you room to build on a bedroom and bathroom on the ground floor? We did this 15 years ago, when we decided that moving would be too expensive, especially as we were happy with our area. So we now have upstairs free for the family to stay.

In the year before I retired I realised I wouldn't be able to afford a new washing machine, dishwasher, Dyson etc after my retirement so I replaced all my white goods and new laptop whilst still earning.

Now I'm retired and enjoying life I am going to move house because at some point in the future I will have to give the car up and I live 9 miles from the nearest train station. So I suppose I am crossing bridges early but I prefer my 101 year old aunt''s view that I'm being sensible.

I'm only 55 but do have a degenerative condition so I am already starting to think about this. We've still got one son at home but when he goes, we're thinking of downsizing to be nearer the town so we can continue to be as independent as possible for as long as we can.

We knew we would have to move for financial and practical reasons but it was still hard to leave a well-loved home. Our sons also found it an emotional wrench as it had been their childhood home. But having said that we found a new place and I'm really pleased we made the move while we still could and not before we had to. I agree with all GNs who recommend crossing the bridge before you reach a crisis point. I put our home on the market and wanted a buyer before we found a new place. Would have been prepared to move into a rented place as an in-between move, if we hadn't found a new place that suited us.

Just in the process of downsizing from a huge Victorian house that now needs a lot doing to it to a much smaller Victorian house that also needs a lot doing but which I will be able to afford to do up and make my own with the profits of selling the old house.
A downstairs loo and shower will be top priority for if I ever have problems managing the stairs.
After almost31 years in my present house the amount of clearing and chucking out is phenomenal and emotionally as well as physically exhausting. But I see it as a challenge and getting my new house lovely will I think be quite an adventure and I'm glad to be doing it while I'm still fit enough to manage and enjoy it.

Due to DH having many health problems whilst still young, we have always been thinking about where we should live. We made the move in our late 50s early 60s. We are very happy where we live now. It is up to you what you do but moving house is a very tiring and stressful business and possibly worth doing while you are able. Whatever you decide I wish you well.

I am moving from a 3 bed roomed semi next month when I retire to a 1 bed flat with a large balcony , plenty of room for a little table and chairs to sit out and some pots the other end so I have a bit of "garden" to look at and all on one level for when I'm older, I'll be 63 when I move. I'm in pretty good, health at the moment but do have spinal stenosis so sometimes I can't walk as far as I want because of pain.

I'm going to be on the same housing estate as my two daughters and will be able to see my grandchildren every day if I want to, an absolute luxury! I can't wait! Im young enough to make new friends, am planning time for new activities and can still drive fine so can keep up with friends in my old area. I say plan carefully now and move when you want to not when you have no choice

I downsized from a large 3 bed house to a 1 bed flat 2years ago...I tried staying there after my husband died 7 years ago but after 5 years of strugging with the upkeep and the enormous garden and my health deteriorating I had had enough...in hindsight I wish I had moved whilst I was fitter as its taken a lot of time for me adjusting to my new surroundings...
my advice dont wait do it while your well enough to do it...

We're both in our early/mid seventies, and we downsized four years ago from a family home to a two bedroom log bungalow that we were fortunate enough to be able to have built specifically with old age in mind and it's absolutely brilliant. Someone once said to me to begin to prepare for old age in late middle age, while you still have the energy and brain power(!!!) to do it. Same with going into a home, do it while you still have choices, leave it too late and choices will be made for you!

We did the opposite in our early 60's as we "upsized" into a larger modern house but detached. A detached house for our old age was number 1 priority ! (No noise from neighbours) We now have 2 seperate rooms downstairs plus a conservatory so as we are both at home together we can have our own space ! A straight staircase has proved valuable as I now have a stairlift. Good luck to anyone thinking of moving home. I agree with all thats been said. "Do it earlier rather than later."

I divorced two of years ago having been separated for many years. I intended to downsize immediately for financial reasons but the thought of all the de-cluttering was a bit overwhelming. After much deliberation I decided to stay where I am until I retire in four years time. By then I will have more time for dealing with the inevitable sorting of "stuff" and may have been able to get my DD and DS to remove their stored belongings. However I definitely want to make the move while relatively young and able. Already the garden is proving difficult for me to cope with so I want something with less work. I certainly don't want to be forced into a move due to ill health as happened to my mother in her later years. I will move on my terms in a planned and thought through way and hope the next move can be my last if I choose wisely. If you can see a bridge that will need to be crossed in the future it makes sense to plan for it then cross it when circumstances are suitable all round not when you no longer have a choice.

My dear sister always says "plan for the worst and hope for the best".
DH and I know we can manage in this house if either of us is left/goes off our pins so think we'll be staying put.
Definitely worth thinking about sooner rather than later.