Swearing

My husband can be a bit sweary, but never in public, and never the 'c' word. His parents hated all bad language and would never allow it in their home, or indeed in front of them. So he was able to control his language when we visited them, not so much as a 'bloody' passed his lips. I remember his mother once burnt herself on the iron and said 'oh hell!' and his father frowned at her and said 'Maude! Language!' (not her real name).

I taught my kids/grandchildren to think about the company they were keeping when swearing & they do, they don't swear in school or with some people but they do with their friends or me cos I don't mind it.
My dad used to call my mum a 'lazy fat guttersnipe' he didn't swear but he was offensive to mum, which was worse I reckon.

I’m currently watching a Spanish tv series which has English subtitles. Whenever they say a word which should translate to “bloody” the subtitles insert the Fword.

The worst my Dad ever said was Bull????. My mother was 97 when she died and I don’t remember her ever swearing at all in front of us children. Whether she did behind closed doors I will never know. My girls only ever swore once when they were small, got a lecture from me and never did it again.

My Mum used to work as a midday supervisor in an all girls convent school. One rainy lunchtime when the girls were all inside she heard a girl having a general conversation with a male teacher and every other word she said began with ‘F’. After she had gone my Mum said to the teacher how shocked she had been at the girl’s language his response was that some children can’t express themselves at home so it’s good they can express themselves in school. This would have been 1970-1980 times.

I gave my 9 year old. (autistic) grandson a copy of 'The curious incident of the dog in the night time' thinking it was a censored version for children as picked from children's bookshelf. He started reading it, then gave it back to me telling me that he didn't think the language was suitable for him. It triggered an interesting conversation about language!

Grandma70s makes a very good point about who decides which words are swear words.
The word f**k allegedly came from the Germanic 'fuk' back in the 13 or 14th century and was in common daily usage meaning to hit or strike.
It was not until 3 or 4 centuries later that the word evolved to take on a sexual meaning that it became taboo.
Language is constantly evolving.
Sadly the emergence of TV and social media have put it back into common parlance.

Janal1

My Neighbour told me to F--- off a few months ago when her Son climbed into our garden to get his football and i said it would have been nice to have been asked first.

What kind of a F'ing neighbour is she?! . . Joke, admin!
I know it has become a verbal embellishment to reinforce many feelings such as distaste, wonder, excitement, just about everything. I was brought up where the F-word was part of language amongst certain occupations and lifestyles, but never heard it in my parents' home, ever. It makes me uneasy when I hear it used in an aggressive way.

There is much use of the f word on Clarksons Farm.Love the show but could do without the swearing.

I was 21 in 1972 when for the first time a man used the word bull***t in front of me, I had literally no idea, not even an inkling , what it meant, nor had my mother, who was 25 years older than I. This episode took place at an exibition in the Kelvin Hall in Glasgow.

About the same time my 16 year old sister came home from school ( a private all girls' school) and asked Mummy what f* meant.

Again, Mummy did not know, and Daddy asked where on earth my sister had heard that word. When she truthfully replied that one of the girls at school had used it, he wrote a letter of complaint to the headmistress, who wrote back saying that she had no control over the language that pupils heard in their homes, or used during break where no teacher was present.

So even then standards differed. Expletives such as damn, hell were used in my family (by adults) anything blasphemous or sexual was not.

When I was five, I asked my mother how old you had to be to say, "Shut up!" an expression that children were not allowed to use, but that we heard our fathers and uncles say. Amazed Mummy asked what I meant, and I said that you had to be 16 to drink beer or smoke, or drive a car, so how old did one need to be to say words like shut up, damn, hell, etc.

After that incident the grown -ups' language was more restrained for quite some time.

I honestly have never heard any of my AC swear but once, when driving them when they were quite small, a driver cut me up causing me to brake hard. The children all cried out and I yelled at the driver ‘ you stupid b… ‘. Weeks later there was another mad driver and you can guess what piped up from the back seat!

When my kids were very young, a friend and myself ran a play group in a foreign country. We had ex pat children and many other nationalities. One child had an English mother and Arabic father and lived with his family. I caught the child one day, he must have been about three, calling another child who had taken a toy from him, a bloody stupid bastard! The mother had a very red face when told this, she was a rather high handed university lecturer.

And we wonder why some of our schools have become battle grounds for teachers! How on earth can they instil respect and good manners into children brought up like that let alone manage to teach them?

I hate swearing! When I was 10 my Dad told some young boys off for swearing! We were stood at a bus stop. You couldn’t do that today, some youths would react badly. I’ve never sworn at my children I suspect they swear, they are 38 and 43. However they respect my wishes and don’t swear in front of me. I absolutely hate hearing females swear, I’m afraid I’m old school. I’m 70.

I’m afraid I must be a terrible GM. We were recently 3 generations together on a family holiday. We have since shared all the photos and videos we took. In one of them I can be heard in the background saying tough s..t to dgs2. It has caused much hilarity amongst the family. In my defence dgs2 had been hard work, frequent melt downs and tantrums. He’s 4 and is reacting to the fact that his baby sister is getting attention. He’d asked for pasta and cheese for dinner, I’d made a pasta bake which had cheese on it. My response was caused by him telling me he didn’t like that type of pasta or cheese. I thought I said it under my breath. I was obviously mistaken.

Disgraceful and not funny! Someone will 'thump' your grandaughter if she says that to the wrong person especially at school! No wonder we teachers have discipline problems... One parent told a member of my staff that if he shouted at her child he,the child,was just to shout right back at the teacher! Says it all I'm afraid....no respect for anyone

Whether we like it or not, language changes and these days words that we would have never dreamed of using in our own childhoods or even later are not only part of life in most contexts but also in books that are winning prizes and gaining prominent positions in booksellers' windows. I'm reading one now - Fundamentally by Nussaibah Younis - and am really enjoying it!

I recall my grandmother saying "what in heaven's name" and "who in heaven has decided that" when she was shocked or frustrated - this has now morphed into "what the f..." and "who the f..." and these phrases are commonplace in work organisations of all kinds. Interestingly, sitting in a hidden corner of a hospital x-ray waiting room recently I heard two radiographers talking, one saying to the other "who the f..." ordered this? only to be answered by the other person with "what the f... does it matter?" These were two professionals. I'm certain that they wouldn't have spoken like that in front of the patient or the doctor - but felt comfortable talking to each other in a code they both understood.

As far as mothers finding it comical when their children copy their own swearing goes, this goes to the social circles they're keeping at the time (not to how their parents spoke to them). Suzieq66 your daughter probably has friends who do the same. Happily though when these young children mix with children who don't swear they will either learn it's not acceptable in all social milieus because the parents of their friends will not allow the play dates, or they will have their swearing vocabulary expanded, in which case your daughter might object when her child comes home and calls her something very choice and offensive.

Janal1

My Neighbour told me to F--- off a few months ago when her Son climbed into our garden to get his football and i said it would have been nice to have been asked first.

Lovely 🙄

Not so much the use of the word as a poor choice of adjective, which has been around for years, but the use of it that is abhorrent is now prevalent as aggression. Why would you allow a child to speak to you that way?

I ran a cub pack while Akela was on maternity leave some years ago, and 2 brothers would swear a lot. I told them I would teach them some better words to use. F.. iddlesticks, B...otheration. C..harlie. They did for a while.

I have less issue with swearing that blasphemy. I wonder what the outcry would be if we started using the name of the prophet where we hear Jesus or Christ or both. I watched a Top Gear programme where the swear words were bleeped out but that was broadcast.

Our 87 year old neighbour used to be jolly and cheerful but has now decided that we are her enemies.
We tried to explain that we are her friends.
We were absolutely amazed that she called DH a f*****g liar.
Oh dear.

Father did swear mainly taking the Lords name in vein! But did so rarely at least at home. Mother I cannot tecall ever uttering a profanity.even my older siblings didn't swear but I suspect did so when out and about with friends. Not my sister. My DH never swore, how he managed to hold back with some of the things and people he had to deal with in his work I'll never know. To hear small children swearing is awful, even teenagers and it's all learned behaviour. Yet if someone used the same sort of language towards them they would file for verbal assault.

I recently was trying to open a video call from my DD who was staying at my DS's home with my granddaughter, her neice. I couldn't open the phone properly and swore at the phone in frustration. My DD gave me a right telling off for swearing in front of her 3 year of neice. I felt really guilty and hope the child doesn't repeat my outburst. Unfortunately I guess in some households that is par for the course, but I will be much more careful in future!

I learned enough swear words in context when I read Lady Chatterly’s Lover when a school friend brought in her dad’s banned copy. We were 12. I never found the need to overly use the words later in life but boy did we love that book. Raised our expectations somewhat!

I remember a friend saying she thought her name was fuvk off until she was 8. It was said in jest.

My parents stuck with words like Blimey, Bloody, and Bugger, and I wasn't allowed to copy them. My mother had been in the ATS working on radar and she said that all the soldiers they worked with were very careful about their language when they were with the women

When my daughter was born we made up fake swear words for her. I remember Plug was a favourite. She could say it if she was annoyed or frustrated and passersby weren't going to be shocked. I've never heard any of my grandsons swear at all, and they're all teenagers now.

You can't beat a well placed profanity