Xmas Sadness

Oh dear I think it does make some people sad. I do love it but its New Year that takes me that way.

Bluesky i know what you mean. I always find Christmas is tinged with sooo much sadness, loss of parents, and other family members, broken families and all the hurt that arises especially at Christmas, and people who are lonely. Yes it can be a fantastic time, but also very sad.

I wouldn't say the carols, shop decorations etc. make me sad, but definitely nostalgic.

It's a time to reflect on Christmas's past, of the laughter, fun and family members and friends who are no longer with us but are always in our hearts and thoughts especially at this festive time of year.

I can identify with these feelings and I think it’s a mixture of nostalgia for the past- childhood memories of Christmas - sadness for those who have passed away or who are now living too far away to share in Christmas and a feeling of another year gone by. Our youngest daughter lives in Canada and we haven’t seen her for 2 years,the thought of another. Christmas without being able to give her a hug is very upsetting. That said,I do like hearing Christmas carols and sending and receiving cards and usually get into the spirit of the festive season once it gets closer, it’s certainly a time of mixed emotions.

I don’t feel sad but I don’t feel anything I don’t hate it but I don’t love it it’s just something to get through I think it makes a huge difference if you have a big family around you a big get together but if you’re alone or just one or two it’s a non event really

I dread Christmas. You are expected to be running round like a maniac buying piles of presents and preparing vast quantities of food for the hordes who are bound to descend on you - when you are not out at a non stop succession of parties yourself. No wonder so many people end up calling help lines when their reality bears no relation to the mad social whirl in which we are supposed to be engaged. We are both retired, our DC live at opposite ends of the globe, we have no siblings and DH and I have spent a horrible Christmas Day at my Mum's nursing home for the last two years. Poor old Mum has now left us so we are free to escape for a week to a remote Scottish cottage with no TV or mobile connection. Sorry to sound like Scrooge!

I never do what is expected so do not run round like a maniac, buy vast quantities of food or go to parties, but I do have family who gather round for at least part of the time between Christmas and New Year. They live 100 and 200 miles away respectively, so it is nice for us to be together for 4-5 days during the Christmas period, not necessarily including Christmas Day.

I am not remotely interested in comparing my Christmas with anyone elses. I do what keeps me and my family happy and everybody else is free to do what they want

I do not feel sad thinking about past happy Christmases with those who have died. We all die sooner or later, so why let the death of those who would have predeceased you anyway stop you enjoying anything (except in the immediate aftermath of their death).

If I was on my own, I wold still celebrate Christmas they way i have always done.

I don’t mind being on my own, am use to it. I really miss going to Midnight Mass, yes the service but after the service the greetings leaving Church, people from all walks of life, the window cleaner, aristocracy, milkmans wife, librarians, GP’s, retired people, young people, for those minutes the true spirit of Christmas is truely felt.

Another Scrooge here , I do charity "presents" so don't have to shop , except for the Grand children , who are probably getting to old for my gift of PJs , they get a small donation to their savings . I love the Carols in Church , Midnight Mass (sadly at 8pm on the Eve) and short visits from everyone , I have no idea what I will be doing this year , but it wont be partying . Secretly a day on my own wouldn't bother me , getting used to that

I prefer to be on my own. Half the family in Australia the other half either entertaining or working so I'm more than happy to do my own thing at my own pace-----still cook myself a Christmas dinner though with enough to use up on Boxing Day.
I enjoy the carol service on TV ( through glazed eyes ) while I think about the poor beggars with children who can't afford Christmas which makes me feel worse. Life isn't fair for them.

I realised that perhaps these posts should have been under The Black Dog Gang? Anybody knows how to move them there?

Annie, if you belong to a church, is there anyone who can take you to the midnight service? Even if you don’t, perhaps you could contact the vicar/ priest and see if there is someone who could take you. I don’t know if you have moved to a new area,but often local churches will be happy to see a new member. I am not a churchgoer myself, but I know that in my previous home and in this one there are volunteer drivers to take people to church. You write beautifully about the happy memories you have of the midnight service.

Dora the church in this parish is facing closure, no longer a priest, retired priests come to take services , so sad there is no church community now.

No I love Christmas and always have, it would be different if I was alone I guess. I am always a bit melancholic at New Year

All the fake hype, all the manipulations of family staying here one year and there the other, all the inappropriate presents. All the waste of money. You can keep it. Yes that makes me sad

I avoid involvement wherever practical. I think it stems from the feeling that however good my life is, someone somewhere is 'doing it better' - the view strengthened by all the adverts and articles - I know how to buy and wrap presents, how to make a lovely meal etc etc. But year after year one is told there is a better way. It is all to serve commerce. It is oddly comforting to know I am very much not alone in this!! May we all reach January in a calm state of mind.

And I'm with AnnieBach - the true spirit of Christmas is not to be found on the high street.

For me, Christmas signifies the birth of Christ, so it is the happiest day of the year.
I take on board all the losses and sadnesses of people which happen in all our lives, but rejoice, knowing that Love has been poured out for us. We all need love to strengthen and give meaning to life and to try and help all those around us when we are able to offer help.
When I visit the sick, elderly and lonely, nothing gives me greater joy than to see the smile on their faces knowing that they have not been forgotten and they can share their thoughts and concerns.

My father and my father-in-law both died very close to Christmas so there is always some sadness for us. They both died in their early fifties when we were in our early twenties so we always reflect on how much of our lives they have missed.

Dora, I'd be interested to know where you live as I am really concerned about your lack of community?

Yes, it does make me sad......nostalgic.!!

No, Christmas displays don’t make me feel sad, although completely understand that those who are now alone, or recently bereaved feel that way ( although the OP said not for those reasons.)
I quite enjoy browsing all the Christmas bits and bobs.

Yes Lemongrove I did say those who feel sad at Xmas not because of any actual reason. Therefore it's another aspect of depression I guess...

I am with sandelf, Christmas isn’t in tinsel and shop windows.

NannyC2. Same for me, and that knowledge knowing that millions around the world are sharing the rejoicing of the birth of the Christ Child with us