What would you do

I am inclined to agree with your husband. This is not a friend, and you deserve better. We all do. Trust is gone and unlikely to return. Sorry to say this but she will almost certainly let you down again. Concentrate on your husband, your health, family and other friends.
I am sorry you don’t let anyone get close now, while understandable, don’t let one person spoil new friendships, there are good and loyal people out there.

Do you feel strong enough to see her, emotionally?
Would you then feel strong enough to decide not to see her again if that was what you decided?
Would you be planning to discuss her betrayal of you, or do you think you could just put it behind you? (I couldn't!)
Does she expect that it will all be forgotten, and that you'll start again with a 'clean slate'?

Your DH is right.

Two words....and the second one is Off.

If it was me, I'd have nothing to do with her and just ignore any pleas on her behalf. I'm with your DH on this. Do you have other friends you can rely on? If so, you don't need her friendship. And even if you don't have other friends, you still don't need the aggravation of having someone in your life who you just can't trust. But only you can decide if the relationship can be mended.

Your 'friend' has had two chances. Why would you give her a third chance?

You would be better off devoting your energies to making new, and kinder, friends.

She needs you, but you do not need her! Concentrate on your husband and the positives in your life. You do not deserve to be hurt again.

I think you probably miss the friend you thought she was, rather than the 'friend' she has proven herself to be.
Such a shame for you, but you'll probably come to realise that she is back in touch because of her needs, rather than any care about your wellbeing.

I agree with MissAdventure you are missing the idea of her as a friend. Don't risk letting her back in, there are plenty of other people out there who don't come with any baggage.

If I was in your shoes, I wouldn't give her the time of day. She's betrayed you twice; been instrumental in your declining health and now she wants a third chance? What would be the point of seeing her and starting up the friendship again, OP? You'd never be able to share any confidences with her for fear that she would hurt you again. And instruct the cornerstone of friendship? Save yourself the worry and unease and do as Merlotgran suggests.

Isn't trust not instruct fhs

No, no, no, twice is enough, move on

She isn't going to change her nature, you will never be able to trust her. Probably her conscience pricks her , she wants to patch things up so she can feel better about what she did. She isn't doing it for your benefit.

I think your DH is right. She’s had a second chance and betrayed you again. I’m sorry but I don’t think she can be trusted and you will be hurt again. Let her go.

In the words of the song, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me". And you're considering being fooled a third time? I'm absolutely with your DH here. There are plenty of people out there who could be a good friend to you. Why choose someone who has twice proved they are not worthy of your friendship?

You deserve better than this. You need to start believing that.

Hello ruthiek

Agree with all the above posters.

She was not your friend in the first place.
Friends do not betray or abuse trust.
So there is no friendship to continue or rekindle.

Think of your Dh
He must be so afraid that this person is at the very least going to you let you down and could cause you further emotional upset or ill health.

There is too much to risk
So for your own sake and the sake of your DH please do not give her he time of day

Betrayal does not go hand in hand with friendship..leave her behind..make new friends..you deserve to be good to yourself..she wasn't!!

Are you not missing something which never existed? It wasn't a friendship ny love . If you wish you can write and tell her you forgive the hurt she has inflicted on you and this is where you wish to leave it. There are so many good people who you could form good friendships with, I wish you peace after all that hurt x

Time for the wisdom of Maya Angelou:

“The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”

thank you everyone, you have made me face reality, I am trying to recapture sonething that was really never there, it was one sided . I need peace and love in my life now.

No way.
She’s had a second chance, which IMO she didn’t deserve, time to cut her loose.

Oh Mawbrtom you always dispense common sense ?

Just a question....does your ‘friend’ know that you are aware of her betrayal? Did you tell her that you knew about it at the time?

That lady is no friend. You don't betray friends in the way she did.
To do that once is awful, but to go back and do it again is unforgivable.
You will always be wondering if you can trust her.
I wonder if she too is ill and wanting to put her house in order. Why would she send her partner round to see you? It sounds as if there is more to it.
I would steer clear of her.

Certainly not. You were generous enough to let her back in your life only for the same to happen again.
You deserve better friends than her.
There’s an old saying, not often used, ‘they’ll need me before I need them’.
Sadly this seems to be the case.
It’s never too late to make new, kind and trustworthy friends. Cast this bully aside.