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Do I look that decrepit ?

(39 Posts)
NanKate Mon 03-Jul-17 19:21:41

I went on a tour round a National Trust House today with a friend. One of the staff came over to me and said 'there are plenty of seats for you to sit on around the house'. Admittedly I am not 100% at present but I didn't think I looked that bad.

I should have asked if they had a defibrillator to hand grin

kittylester Mon 03-Jul-17 19:53:02

Hi Kate! I bet you don't look that bad!

JoyBloggs Mon 03-Jul-17 19:56:48

Good to see a post from you NanKate, haven't seen one for a while. I'm sorry you aren't 100% at the moment but hope you will soon be fighting fit! Visiting NT houses is a great way of recuperating, hope you managed a while in the cafe for brew and cupcake

sarn26 Mon 03-Jul-17 20:00:36

I know how you feel NanKate. I felt similarly when a young man gave up his seat for me on the underground recently. Whilst grateful I was concerned that it meant I was looking old and decrepit. I spent the remainder of the journey closely studying every other standing passenger and comparing them 'age-wise' to myself. I will add, I'm only 58.

hildajenniJ Mon 03-Jul-17 20:40:27

Same happened to me on a bus in Glasgow sarn. A gentleman gave up his seat for me. It was one of those at the front with a notice asking for the seat to be given to the elderly. I might be 65 but I can still run up our hill!
I hope you feel on top form again soon NanKate.

grannyqueenie Mon 03-Jul-17 20:57:28

This made me smile, nankate I'm 66 and generally active and pretty fit but had a nasty bug last week and haven't been eating well since so am feeling, and probably looking, a wee bit pale and wan. Yesterday, to cheer me up a bit, we went to visit an NT place and I really felt like sitting down, until I noticed the carefully placed spiky teasels on the antique chairs! Let's hope we both feel on better form soon.

Chewbacca Mon 03-Jul-17 23:00:57

Still a bit miffed that I was given the "senior citizens " ticket at the cinema and my friends was not. I was 57 and my friend was 60. Still makes me scowl to think of it!

NanKate Mon 03-Jul-17 23:11:36

Thanks ALL. I tried to look a bit sprightly after that knock back about my demeanour but I didn't fool anyone.

Hi Kitty I suspect I did look a bit dodgy.

Thanks Joy for noticing my absence. smile

Finally my friend who I was with said 'Are you limping' ? 'No I am bloody well not, well maybe just a tiny limp' grin

TriciaF Tue 04-Jul-17 09:48:51

grin
"I should have asked if they had a defibrillator to hand"
I was very amused to see a large notice on the door of our tax office - 'this building is equipped with a defibrillator'
Not surprising as there's a steep staircase inside, and a large number of the locals are very elderly (80-90+)

KatyK Tue 04-Jul-17 10:05:26

Oh dear NanKate About 5 years ago, after a really bad spell when I lost my hair, I went out with my sister. I was feeling chipper with my new hair system for which I was getting lots of compliments. We met someone my sister knew who said to her 'oh how lovely to see you and this must be your mother'. I was fuming - I am 9 years older than my sister. Well, that brought me down to earth with a bang. My sister however, was thrilled. grin

Charleygirl Tue 04-Jul-17 10:09:56

Every time I go on a tube or bus I ma offered a seat. I accept gracefully each time unless I am only going one stop which is unusual. Maybe it is my walking stick- I do not know.

silverlining48 Tue 04-Jul-17 10:37:50

Katyk years ago i was with a friend in m&s shoppi g and the assustant said to me ' 'that teally suits your daughter'. My friend was 6 weeks younger than me.

Mspjam123 Tue 04-Jul-17 10:40:41

I think context (aka ageism) comes into it. Some people only expect to encounter a certain age-band in given situations and treat you accordingly no matter how youthful you look.

KatyK Tue 04-Jul-17 10:44:18

Isn't it annoying silverlining ? On the bright side, I have been out with my DD (who is in her 40s) a couple of times and she has referred to me as 'mum' and a couple of people have siad 'that's never your mum, she doesn't look old enough.' DD was less than pleased but I was happy smile I'll cling on to the nice comments I think!

Derek100 Tue 04-Jul-17 10:47:21

If you really want to know, post a photo on here. Not that visual looks are as important as personality.

inishowen Tue 04-Jul-17 10:47:39

The worst thing said to me was when I'd just turned 50. DH and I went out for a meal and the young waitress asked if we were there for the pensioners special! I was devastated!

Antonia Tue 04-Jul-17 10:54:25

My mother was an 'older mum' and she never got over taking me out and people telling me, "how lovely to be going out with your granny."

KatyK Tue 04-Jul-17 11:04:48

Oh dear! Some of these stories. When I was working and was about 45, thinking I lookekd good, a young chap at work said to me 'you can't be far from retiring' Grrr

nipsmum Tue 04-Jul-17 11:05:36

When I was married and had just had my first daughter, a ?salesperson knocked at the door to our flat. I answered the door with the baby in my arms and was asked, Is your mother in ? To which I very quickly replied I am the mother. I was 26 at the time. Some people dont really look at you they just assume things especially age.

Candelle Tue 04-Jul-17 11:06:43

Everything was 'good' (a la Mr Trump) until a few years ago: until then it was assumed that I was my grand-children's mother (and on one occasion, my daughter's sister) and I was always asked at hospital visits 'when was your last period'. I felt very smug.

However, all of the above comments have ceased and I am now always recognised as a grandma, so old-age has caught up with me. Boo hoo.

minxie Tue 04-Jul-17 11:20:46

I was expecting the gas man and he knocked on the door and asked if my mum was in. I said hang on I'll give her a ring and find out. I was in my mid thirties at the time. Well chuffed

Kim19 Tue 04-Jul-17 11:26:19

I always accept the offer of a seat on public transport because I wish to encourage the practice which, in my experience, is rapidly dying out. Interestingly, I have sometimes vacated my seat for a less able person - it's kind of spontaneous (and I'm ancient) - which has resulted in someone younger reciprocating. I always remember whilst in Canada many years ago my husband enquiringly about the qualifying age for senior validity. He only just complied and the ticket lady 'assumed' and gave us two concessionary tickets. I was 9 years his junior and said nothing in the interests of sheer peeve! Maybe the young lady in question was ultra perceptive and just being kind? Better that than the reverse but..... I know what you mean!

Romymo Tue 04-Jul-17 11:43:53

Gladdened to hear that some people are kind enough to give up their seat. I always accept whenever one is offered!

starlily106 Tue 04-Jul-17 12:12:31

Recently I was asked by a woman on the bus to give her my seat. "After all, I'm a lot older than you". I stood up, she sat down. Then she announced to all and sundry "I'm turned 70 now". I had to smile, because tomorrow I will be 80. Not in the best of health myself, but didn't really mind giving up my seat, as she maybe had health problems herself which I didn't know about.

RosemarySuperager Tue 04-Jul-17 12:18:36

doubly taxing no doubt!