Missing a dear friend ......

I understand, I had a good friend in Spain. I always knew Christmas was coming when her(very) early card and huge thick newsy letter arrive. Yesterday I found myself thinking 'I should get R's letter any day soon' - then caught myself up short as I realised I would never ever get another one.

The same thing happened to me this year. A very good friend died and I find myself doing something like picking tomatoes and thinking I must take some round to her and then it hits me again.

So sad for you all.
All I can say is that its lovely that you have such pleasant memories. They are truly not forgotten.

Christmas is a time when memories of friends and loved ones seem to come into sharper focus, alongside the good things there is always someone who is suffering.

Hold onto to those good memories, it is lovely that you had such friendship, but it is sad when you realise you can not make any more memories with that person. Hugs to you all.

A very dear friend and colleague died 4 years ago, weeks before her 54th birthday. I think of her frequently and try to keep her memory alive by being in contact with her two now grown-up children. My friend lost her husband when they were little, raised them on her own, and when she knew she was dying, held on long enough to see her daughter qualify as a doctor. I promised that when her children had children, I would knit their first baby blanket on her behalf.

How wonderful it is to have had such a lovely person as a friend. Her daughter marks Mother's Day and birthdays with a photo of her mum on Fb. Never forgotten.

I was writing some Christmas cards this afternoon and realised I hadn't heard from a particular friend for some time. I phoned his number - no reply - so left a message. Three hours later I'm getting really worried as this is not normal. He has had a lot of health issues in recent years so I'm telling myself he's in hospital ... surely his family would have let me know if it's worse than that?

This afternoon I was doing some sorting out when I came across a baby jacket that had been knitted by a dear friend for my 2nd little grandson unfortunately my friend died before being able to sew the little buttons on.
What do I do
Keep it as keepsake
or sew some buttons on and pass on to charity shop for another little baby to wear?
I can't decide
it was the last thing she knitted

Izzabella we have these sad times don't we, when a friend is no longer there.I sometimes forget [for a second] who is actually dead when writing cards.
Cherry I think that your friend would like a baby to wear the jacket that she made.

What lovely messages one and all. Set me off again ........

Thank you. And lovely to read the memories of others too.

My lovely friend died four years ago and I still miss her; I have other very nice friends but there is no-one else I can tell my innermost thoughts to. There is no-one else with whom I can laugh so much.
Izabella

Cherrytree if you know of another baby to pass it on to I am sure she would have been pleased, otherwise to charity unless you can't bear to part with it.

My brother died 49 years ago this week, just after we'd put up the Christmas decorations. The association is still one that I can't shift even after all these years.

for those whose joy in the season is tinged with sadness.

I still have the last baby jacket my mother knitted 38 years later. And I'm not someone that keeps things at all. She was disabled and the knitting cost her much effort and took nearly the whole pregnancy to complete.

Lost my dear friend three years ago. Being of a scatty and disorganised nature, I could always rely on her to kick things back into order; we laughed a lot, two very different woman but a bond of forty years between us. I miss her.

cherry tree, does your friend have family who you could offer the jacket to? I am sure it would be treasured by them.

My daughter's father and my mum both died on 5th December 2010. My dad died 10th December 1980.

Going through my Christmas card list for last year I find there are some people from whom I did not receive one back. All elderly like me. Am I to assume that they have died. Why don't their relatives inform everyone? Surely they had an address book.
I do miss my sister who died four years ago. We used to be in touch almost every day and confide in one another. Christmas is not a joyful,time for many people.

Disgruntled that is so sad

Back in the seventies my mother had a lovely old neighbour who, like many women her age, had married a young soldier during WWI. He went off to fight and never came back. She received news of his death on Christmas Eve. All those years later she still could not celebrate Christmas as it was just so painful for her.

Oh I know exactly how you feel Izabella and others. I lost my mum in April and now that it is getting close to Christmas (which she loved) I am feeling the loss more than ever. My mum was in a wheelchair and we enjoyed shopping for presents for the little ones together. She loved the family Christmas meal (always at mine) and things will just never be the same without her. I wish I could remember all the good times and her lovely smile, but I am still not able to stop seeing her face in her last hours and after she died. It keeps me awake at night.

Today my dear uncle would have been 100. He died 13 years ago, 8 days after my aunt/godmother, on either side of Christmas. They meant so much to me. I was staying there, to take care of my uncle, when he died of pneumonia. With the help of a wonderful undertaker, we arranged to bury them together on a day of bitter frost. I wrote a eulogy but the vicar had to deliver it for me as my voice had completely vanished. I still miss them, especially at Christmas - when my aunt's stroke made it impossible for them to come to me, I would cross the Pennines and spend the day with them.

i lost my best friend almost three years ago now and i still find myself thinking "must tell jan that" and then realising that i can't.
somehow it's worse than losing my mum in 2007 and my dad in 2008 but my friend and i were very close.
we told each other everything and usually spoke every day on the phone when we weren't going out.
she's left such a big hole in my life - other friends just aren't the same.
christmas always seems "not quite right" because of my parents and my friend not being here.

I have my much loved kids and GC but I miss the people I loved who knew me when I was younger. In particular my dear friend who died several years ago, her husband used to ring me every few months to let me know how they were all doing, then he rag to tell me he had met someone new (my friend gave him strict instructions to do this and be happy) at that point she seemed so distant, I had enjoyed just remembering her with him............

My last link was gone and I haven't heard from him since.

I miss her terribly and look back on her wisdom and friendship as one of the better times of my life.hard to make new old friends.

I lost my precious mum in may and this time of year it seems to be harder than ever. We were like best friends she loved Christmas and all that went with it. I still have my lovely dad but he seems so lost. But I am trying to be strong for all my family and I do understand how you are all feeling. So Christmas blessings to you all

It is sad when we loose friends and family especially this time of year. We miss our son he loved Christmas and it's always hard each day but Christmas is just difficult but we get through it.

Thanks, Swanny.