realising you don't need to keep stuff!

I do agree Jordana. We are still in the middle of a downsizing house move. It has involved clearing a 5 bedroom house and encouraging the kids to sort their stuff (though we still seem to have lots of it) but to my mind, the best bit was staying in a one bedroom apartment between houses with the furniture in store. We literally had a couple of suitcases full of clothes, some books and a laptop each. It was bliss! Both of us didn't want the furniture etc back but of course, it is hard to take that step.
Currently, we are in rental and a lot more has been cleared out. I do not know why we hoard so much or why we imagine our children will want little ornaments or sheaves of paintings they did at junior school or cards they made and gave us!
My mother used to say 'we come into the world we nothing and we leave with nothing'. I used to think this was rather morbid but now I can see the point! Life is, however, slightly less fun now I don't often go into charity shops!

We got rid of a mountain of stuff a couple of years ago, when dh re insulated the loft. Of course we had to clear it bit by bit. A lot of stuff went to charity shops - just one of them informed us later that the things had raised £250! Must have been better stuff than we'd imagined!

I would hope to clear a lot more in future, to save our daughters extra work when we finally cark it. It's the sentimental stuff that's so hard. I still have the lucky horseshoe thing my mother was holding in her wedding photo in 1939. It's still in its box. Dds will have to be hard hearted over that one day - I can't bring myself to chuck it.
Also have a silk christening gown and cape, all beautifully sewn and pintucked, I think by a great granny - which was my father's. He would have been 100 this year.
Another one for dds one day!

One thing I found it hard to chuck was a mass of soft toys of dds' in bin bags in the loft - they still had half a dozen favourites each elsewhere. But I really hate just binning teddies etc.
Luckily we thought of Battersea Dogs' Home, and they said they'd be pleased to have them as long as there were no polystyrene beads. They would get chewed up eventually of course, but if the dogs could enjoy them even for a little while that was good enough for us, and infinitely better than the tip!

I so agree. We heaved and recycled a load of stuff when we moved in July.

I went to a lovely craft fair the other week, bit felt no desire whatever to buy anything even though there were lovely things - no more stuff!

Yes I agree it is just 'stuff'. The only thing I hoarded was a few photographs and I had been thinking of getting rid of those. The decision was made for me after the storm the other day. Leaking roof into the wardrobe where they were stored. Problem solved.

I really do think it could be an 'age' issue, when the priorities change from possessions to things like good health, financial security, happiness for oneself and one's growing family. We will be moving to the UK from France next year and we have already cleared out lots of things that have been in cupboards unused for years. I won't miss any of it.

My 3 daughters all say they`re not interested in inheriting any of my many ornaments, but I was heartened by my youngest son telling me to take care of the Lilliput Lane stuff, because he`d like it when I`m gone, until he said, "it might be worth something!" I have many albums full of photos that my kids will probably bin, but I can`t make myself dispose of them whilst I`m still here.

Yes I've been doing exactly the same thing, burned and shredded lots of paperwork and boxed up 'stuff'.
I used to love collecting old china but don't do that now. Love to see good craft work but restrain myself from buying any. Think it must be an age thing, I remember house clearing after the death of my mother and Aunt and they had things saved for 'best ' which had not been used or worn so that taught me a lesson. I have very little my children or grandchildren want it seems.

I'm not being as good as the rest of you but have started very slowly getting rid of 'stuff'. It's been mostly clothes but I have packed up a miniature china tea set that belonged to my mother who died in 1979 and was taking up room in a kitchen cupboard. I did hum-n- ahh about it because she'd obviously treasured it and I have very little of anything belonging to her. I don't know why we find it so difficult. Could it be because we were bought up by mothers who had to make do and mend? I envy my two DiL who are able to dispose of most of their clothes after 3-6 months. Last year I had to clear my own MiL house and it was packed to the rafters with bedding from the 70's still in the wrapping (being saved for best) clothes, masses and masses of ornaments. Unopened biscuits and sweets and because of the time constraints it all went to the dump. I felt I'd violated her privacy and treated all she held dear with disrespect. Then I realised that all of this was just stuff of no real value to anyone even her. There was so much of it she wouldn't have been able to enjoy it. I'm really going to go for it in March when I retire...honest I am.

But I really hate just binning teddies etc.
We took a car full of stuff to the tip recycling centre the other week and the road inside the centre was lined with teddies and soft toys!

The DGC have enjoyed the soft toys that belonged to the DC but perhaps now is the time to dispose of them
Perhaps

I also think that many of us have reached the age where we have had to clear out parental homes. That does concentrate the mind on what is worth keeping.
I dealt with the photo problem by having a few hundred professionally scanned. Cd roms of scans were then copied and passed to those who expressed an interest. Have also given the DC folders of old school reports, poems they wrote age 7 etc. After all it is their history and they can decide if they want to bin or not.

Getting my parents home ready to be sold after both had died brought home to me how much 'stuff' we had accumulated. I've been trying to de-clutter for a couple of years. Each swoop diminishes the pile of essential treasures I can't part with. I'm currently on photographs, which is a real challenge.

I've fond memories of a very old woman I visited a few times when working 20 years ago. Her adult children wanted her to go into residential care, yet she was managing well enough with support and determined to stay in her lovely home. On each of my visits, she'd show me the collection of photographs she was busily sorting out so not to over burden her children when she was no longer there to do the task. The same photographs were always spread over her large dining table, being moved around. So, as I sort through and eventually manage to put some of my parents holiday snaps which feature people we don't know, in the bin, I often visualise those visits.

When we were moving abroad I gave away many things which I later regretted and have had to buy anew here. But what I did with all tbe family photos was to remove my own photos and then gave a huge boxful of photos of my children to my eldest DD to share out. They then had a family get together and they shared out the photos. They decided the early albums should remain intact with eldest DD. So often when the parents die either one child keeps them all or they get dumped so I thought it better that they could share them out.

I might not be good at many things but I can give myself a pat on the back for getting rid of items that I don't need any longer. I've never really been a hoarder but since I've lived on my own I've been quite ruthless. Every month i spring clean one room and anything that isn't absolutely necessary goes. I think I just don't want my children to be left with everything to sort out when pop off

I feel as many of you do that its time to clear out but lots of my stuff is belonging to DD and she hasnt got room in her house so I feel guilty chucking it out, however I take a big bag to the hospice shop almost every week full of books and stuff I don't use, hoarding books is my weakness.
Think of me when I clear my mothers house out, she has lived there since a child and has her mothers stuff including her wedding dress and grannys clothes and even grannys wedding presents in a drawer, she says that's my job to clear ot out after shes gone.

I have been decluttering for 18 months and about 6 months ago my OH got on board too. It was a slow process for him. I am unsentimental but he is a hoarder.

I was amazed one day to find 40 years of paperwork on the kitchen table ready for shredding. It had taken up a whole wardrobe in the spare room and had bugged me for years. Since then he has really taken up the idea. Even though the book seems to have some crazy ideas, when I expressed them to him he seemed to relate to them and it helped him to let go.

I have been trying to declutter for the past 2 years!

I am a natural hoarder and it's taken me some time to "psych" myself up to get rid of things.

I try to motivate myself by visualising the end result. Can anyone give any other tips/suggestions to help us hoarders? What worked for you?

When I went to the exhibition Fashion on the Ration at the Imperial War Museum they had lots of items on show similiar to hand sewn things and boxed lucky horseshoes etc so perhaps try offering items to museums or appropriate organisations. We had my father in laws fishing rods and they are sought after now. ps the exhibition is still on in Manchester and well worth a visit.

We've just finished redecorating/refurbishing house from top to bottom inc new bathrooms. Most of furniture went to charity shops etc and we spent a couple of months living out of essentials in banana boxes. Point is that I was ashamed amazed at what we had accumulated and the thought of anyone having to sort through after my demise was enough to kick my hoarder mentality into touch. I've always loved my home but now it seems calmer, lighter and more welcoming. I found it so much easier to get rid of stuff after it had been boxed up for a while and I realised that I hadn't really missed it. Yes, even the soft toys, well some of them. Just getting rid of a drawer full of new bras that never seemed to fit right and underwear that had seen better days helped to give me more room. My knicks are now all neatly rolled up in colours and if I do pop my clogs, I won't be looking down red faced as someone sorts through my stuff.

I have had to clear my dad's house. It was so distressing going through stuff that could have been thrown out years ago. We did talk about it but he seemed to think it all a bit of a lark for me after he had gone.

I cry now to think that when I had to make choices, they were not the best ones, not easy to do over a long distance and when you are newly bereaved.

I have tried to start de cluttering so my own kids don't have a lot of stale memories to go through.........some of the things dad left were painful (letters from my estranged sister) and some were wonderful (letter from my dying mum that had been in his wallet for 30 years) I felt sad that he could have spared me some of it.

Tip for decluttering toys; ring your local pre-school play group, providing the toys are in a reasonable condition, they may be interested. I have just cleared garden play toys to our local nursery and they were no-end grateful. Smile

My children and friends make me constantly aware than I am in a 'transition era'. For instance in about twenty years there will be less clutter because much of that practice was generated by war deprivation. Another 'norm' will be everyone constantly on their mobiles and it will therefore no longer be an irritant or considered rude by fuddled people like me. I contend we will have advanced beyond mobiles. To what? Don't ask me. My mind already boggles! Any time I'm having a little grizzle to myself I just say 'Oh, that's me in transition again'. Hallelujah!

My MiL died recently and I've really struggled to donate beds to charity as they do not have the safety labels and therefore cannot be sold on. Despite the lack of safety labels, they are all in very good condition and it seems such a shame to take them to the tip. I've also tried to sell them on gumtree for just a few pounds but still no success. Any suggestions gratefully received. Thank you