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Home is your castle?

(56 Posts)
Ilrina Sat 17-Sept-16 23:51:25

How many of you feel compelled to open your door just because someone knocks at it, or to answer your telephone?

People seem to take it for granted that this will happen. If I am not expecting a caller then I do not open the door.

I may answer the telephone depending on what mood I am in , but I find it annoying that whoever it is calling( And I don't mean cold callers here, I mean people who know me), never ask.." Are you ok to talk or are you busy?". I always ask someone if they have time to talk if I call them. what does everyone else think?

tanith Sun 18-Sept-16 00:10:11

I quite often ignore the door unless I'm expecting someone we get Jehovas often and do ask if someone is busy if the call is for a chat.

absent Sun 18-Sept-16 06:00:57

As far as telephone calls go, I was brought up on the principle that one should not make calls before nine in the morning or after nine at night except in an emergency. Of course, this changed a bit when absentdaughter and I were living on opposite sides of the world. I got the time difference wrong only once and was abject in my apologies for waking her up.

I always check that whoever I have called is not in the middle of something and am always happy to call back later or the next day or whatever.

I do not want to be bothered about life insurance when I am in the middle of supper. I refuse politely and hang up before there is any further discussion.

I always answer the doorbell but am not willing to stand on the doorstep discussing the Bible or committing myself to charitable donations, refusing both politely.

Absentdaughter and grandchildren do not ring the doorbell – apart from the one-year-old who thinks it's a big giggle to do so – and all regard this as a second home. It's not always convenient for them to charge in and take over but I do rejoice that they think of this house as "theirs" and I love them anyway. I spent too many years when I never saw them to complain now that they are here too often.

Willow500 Sun 18-Sept-16 06:10:20

I always answer the door - its usually to take parcels and deliveries anyway and I can normally see the van outside. As I have two phone lines (one work) I have to answer the phone as well - the home line rarely rings and if it's a cold caller I just hang up but with the house up for sale it could be the estate agent so I daren't ignore it. The other one has caller ID on it and once I find it's a nuisance call I block it!

grannylyn65 Sun 18-Sept-16 10:07:21

Was making tablet ( fudge ) when a new friend phoned, too polite to cut short conversation, had to ditch saucepan of burning sugar etc and fumigate house!!!

kittylester Sun 18-Sept-16 10:15:01

We have caller id on both the business phone and our phone but I still tend to answer all calls anyway.

I always open the door too or I would have missed the lady who had a photo (in a book) of a sampler she had that was made by a child who was a pupil in our house in the late 19C.

Teetime Sun 18-Sept-16 10:35:34

I always answer the door and invite people in unless its just a delivery. I have caller ID as there are a couple of people in my world who need carefully handling!!MOstly I answer the phone its usually DH's girlfriends from the Bowls Club wanting him to come out to play.

obieone Sun 18-Sept-16 11:41:25

I wouldnt dream of not answering the door.

phone calls - we have an answermachine if I dont get to the phone in time, which I try.

pensionpat Sun 18-Sept-16 11:48:18

This has got worse since the advent of mobile phones. We are always contactable. We have to remember that technology is a tool for our convenience, not a millstone round our necks. So if it's not convenient to me for any reason, I don't answer. We can find out who it was and decide whether or not to call back later. I always do if family, but not always immediately for friends. And if I don't know the caller I know it won't matter.

Nonnie Sun 18-Sept-16 12:20:07

Always answer the door, it might be someone needing help. It sometimes happened in our last house that cars broke down and we were able to assist. If it is someone we don't want we can always tell them so.

We also answer the phone unless it is a number we recognise and know we don't want to talk to them. On the odd occasion if not busy it is quite possible to really annoy someone telling me my computer isn't working properly! grin

Grannyknot Sun 18-Sept-16 12:29:45

kitty that's lovely.

I always open the door. A few weeks ago it was my new, young neighbour who had locked himself out of his house and (after I said I'd help him get over the fence from our patio onto his) said, "You are so nice and I was so nervous about knocking on your door".

I can't imagine not opening the door. I sometimes don't get to the phone and I think "if it's important they'll try again".

henetha Sun 18-Sept-16 13:08:38

Some days I get a bit rattled by interruptions if I'm not in the mood, I must admit. But I usually answer the door.
It's the phone that annoys me, so I often leave the answer machine on. Family know it's best to call me on my mobile.

jinglbellsfrocks Sun 18-Sept-16 13:14:38

I peek through the window first. Don't answer it if they look dodgy.

Marmight Sun 18-Sept-16 14:13:41

Me too. I always open the door. People always know when I'm in. I only once hid from unwelcome callers - my in laws; I saw them coming through the gate at the bottom of the garden and just had time to lock the back door and crouch down by the fridge where they couldn't see me, until they had gone again. I just couldn't face them. I feel bad about it now but I was a young mum of 3 and they were such hard work ( the in laws not the kids!) (they only lived in the next street. ) blush

Greenfinch Sun 18-Sept-16 14:37:35

I always do both. I guess I am just nosy !

BlueBelle Mon 19-Sept-16 04:51:11

Greenfinch me too, couldn't not open the door or answer the phone feel compelled to it might be important

Jane10 Mon 19-Sept-16 07:30:54

Our problem is that the phone is also the door entry system. Hence if the phone goes it might be someone at the front door downstairs or it might be a phone call. So I always answer just in case but most often its sales people asking to speak to my (now long dead) parents. It was their flat. If in the mood I have fun with those calls.wink

Jaycee5 Mon 19-Sept-16 11:27:37

We have an entryphone so I answer that. People are always surprised if I won't let them in.
My neighbours and I take parcels in for each other so I would always answer the door.
We have a religious group who come round the estate and someone always buzzes them in. I used to be polite but they should know by now that I am not interested so I just shut the door on them.
I don't answer the phone unless I recognise the number. My new phone often says 'telemarketer' under the number which is helpful but it doesn't catch them all. If its a number I don't recognise I google it first and it is very common for them to be reported at PFI or something.

Elysium Mon 19-Sept-16 11:31:15

I would never open my door to anyone, unless I'm expecting visitors. Partly because I can't be bothered, but on the odd time I have been either entering or leaving it, someone has approached me and asked me why I hadn't opened up when they previously called. I don't feel odd? But recently a friend who lives with her mother opened the door one summer evening, three men barged in, roughed them up and burgled her home, taking not only family jewellery and possessions. Unless you always use a chain, I wouldn't bother.

Craftycat Mon 19-Sept-16 11:38:15

Only usually answer phone if I recognise the number & never if it says ' unavailable'. My time is too precious to waste it being rude to cold callers & I am if they catch me by mistake.
I have paterned glass at top of front door so I can see if it is someone I know or a delivery without them seeing me . We get very few strangers calling as it is quiet cul de sac but if I'm not sure I don"t answer it.

Seasidenana Mon 19-Sept-16 11:47:45

I work from home quite a lot and can't answer the door if I'm in the middle of a Skype meeting or conference call. The other day someone was ringing, banging, peering through windows, even coming round the back. I could hear him say "she must be in the car is there" (why ? I might be out walking) it was a delivery man wanting me to take in a parcel for a neighbour. Don't they realise some of us just can't go to the door ? I find it intrusive. I'm making a "do not disturb" notice for when I'm working.

annodomini Mon 19-Sept-16 11:59:48

Am I alone in having a suspicious nature? I'm astounded at the number of posters who open the door willy nilly! I have a chain on the door and a 'fish-eye' which enables me to see who is calling. The only person who comes to the back door (apart form ny neighbours)is the postman when he has something too big to put through the letterbox - and I've known him for many years. It's a 'must' to lock the back door if you go to answer the front door as thieves are known to work in pairs, the front caller distracting the householder while the other nips in and collects one's handbag.

radicalnan Mon 19-Sept-16 12:10:51

So lovely to be able yo ignore phone or door now my old dad is dead and it won't be him needing me. The kids send FB messages so I can pick and choose who I am at home to now.

I miss the days when front doors were propped open, and neighbours stuck their heads in to see if errands were needed or popped a paper round that they had finished reading or left cauliflowers on the doorstep (who was that?)..............

Gone are the days when so much outdoor life trickled through indoors now it is all locks and chains and gates..........and all the poorer for it. No wonder we are bloody lonely.

Bluecat Mon 19-Sept-16 12:52:11

I answer the door but, due to rickety knees, it takes me so long to get there that they've often gone. Good when it's double-glazing salesmen, bad when it's someone delivering a parcel.

Ditto the phone. Now we have an answerphone, I can always ring them back if I need to - I presume that, if it is important, they'll have had the sense to leave a message. I don't use the landline much now that eldest DD is in the US, as we talk on Skype, and practically the only people who call on my mobile are DH or other DD.

BlueBelle Mon 19-Sept-16 12:54:44

Annodomino perhaps its different according to the area you live in I am not in a high crime area although it is considered a deprived area but I never ever feel suspicious about opening the door The only time I would use a chain is very late at night which is common sense I cycle home at night when I ve babysat up to 10 pm after that I m too tired to turn out and would stay the night https