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It's the little things

(20 Posts)
absent Fri 17-Oct-14 06:51:31

I can cope with some horrendous event in my life – illness, divorce, death of a loved one, financial difficulties, etc. – even though it is hard, sad and causes sleepless nights. I deal with whatever it is with strength and purpose. It's the accumulation of small problems – busted washing machine, losing my purse, someone saying something unkind – that really gets to me and makes me feel desperate.

Similarly, it's the accumulation of small things that brings me real happiness – a "poem" about me by granddaughter, the sight of a hedgehog scuttling across the lawn at dusk, tomatoes ripening on the vines in the garden, someone telling me the colour of my shirt suits me.

Am I a superficial and rather sad person or do other people feel this way?

baubles Fri 17-Oct-14 06:59:49

Not in the least superficial or sad absent. When life throws up major problems we just have to knuckle down and deal with them as best we can but accumulated minor irritations can be very wearing.

It is always the little things that please me most, watching the birds in the garden, the autumn light over the fields or an unexpected and impromptu kiss from a child or grandchild.

ffinnochio Fri 17-Oct-14 08:06:36

Being able to enjoy and find happiness in the little things that occur in the ordinariness of daily life is certainly not superficial. Being able to embrace them when times are difficult is something to be valued.

ginny Fri 17-Oct-14 08:38:36

Well said ffinnochio I try to find at least 3 little things each day. That adds up to a lot of happiness over the weeks , months and years.

Yesterday my three things were; a hug from my soon to be son-in-law,
looking out at my garden and seeing the winter pansies nodding in the breeze and an unexpected chat with an old friend.

Lona Fri 17-Oct-14 09:20:08

Not superficial or sad absent, I feel the same too.
I've been living with 'horrendous events' for the last 3/4 years, but thinking of my little dgd, running to me calling "nana", with a huge smile on her face, and I fall apart.

The bad 'little things' make me extremely snappy.

KatyK Fri 17-Oct-14 09:45:39

I too am dealing with horrors at the moment but each time I see my grand-daughter and she gives me a hug makes it all worthwhile. Waking up this morning to sunshine lifted my spirits. Yesterday watching a squirrel frolicking in the garden made me smile. The help family and friends are giving us with DH's illness warms my heart smile

merlotgran Fri 17-Oct-14 09:48:12

The sun is shining, the chickens are clucking, DH cooked breakfast and now the dogs are begging me to take them out. All these little things are helping me to forget yesterday's damage to our small hallway caused by trying to shove a new sofa round a tight corner to get it into the living room. Another redecorating job for me. angry

ninathenana Fri 17-Oct-14 09:52:09

running to me calling nana with a huge smile on her face one of the best feelings in the world isn't it Lona

I too can put troubles out of mind when I see a beautiful sunset/sunrise, when the birds are singing and when I know I've completed a task to my very best ability.

jinglbellsfrocks Fri 17-Oct-14 09:52:28

shock Who didn't do their measurements then? hmm

winkwinkwink !!!

jinglbellsfrocks Fri 17-Oct-14 09:52:49

that was to merlot of course

kittylester Fri 17-Oct-14 09:55:14

Not superficial at all absent!

The Idiot has been living up to his name recently and the DGC are slowly wrecking our house but DGD ran in after taking her brother to school and gave me the biggest hug and I realised that, despite everything, we are privileged to have this time with them.

jinglbellsfrocks Fri 17-Oct-14 09:55:54

I know just what you mean absent and I used to feel exactly the same, but the little things seem to get fewer and fewer these days. It must be me. Nothing's changed.

annodomini Fri 17-Oct-14 09:59:01

I'm exactly the same, absent. I have coped with big crises without going to pieces, but small crises are irritants that won't leave me alone, so I look up at the sunlight filtering through the birch leaves and lighting the autumn colours with a fiery glow.

FlicketyB Fri 17-Oct-14 10:00:04

I Have always found I become cool, calm and absolutely in command when disaster strikes but can be reduced to tears by a very minor problem. I always think true, heart singing happiness, comes in the moment in small things, the sun on autumn leaves, the song of a lark on the downs and the warmth of a cuddle with DGC.

Agus Fri 17-Oct-14 10:01:31

I can deal with major problems and just get on with it but a cutting remark by someone can bother me for days.

Alternatively, I get more joy from a piece of music, sunsets and nature and anything involving both GDs. Kisses, hand made cards,and paintings. A loving gesture from DDs. Much more important in my life as opposed to grand gestures or expensive gifts.

Nothing sad or superficial at all absent. I concentrate on what brings me contentment.

jinglbellsfrocks Fri 17-Oct-14 10:01:38

I'm glad you've got these little things absent. You made a huge effort to get where you are now, and it sounds lovely. Well done. smile

merlotgran Fri 17-Oct-14 10:05:10

All my fault, jingl. You'd think a two seater would be smaller than a three seater but I should have realised it's deeper shock

Nice and comfy though wink

kittylester Fri 17-Oct-14 10:05:12

Nice post jings smile

KatyK Fri 17-Oct-14 10:24:28

I'm like you Agus. My DH is struggling with cancer at the moment and we are going through the mill to say the least. I am strong and coping (I think). However, someone we know was rather rude to him recently and I am incensed. He says 'sod em, we've got more important things to worry about' but I can't get this person out of my head, I feel like slapping her. Odd isn't how unimportant things can get us so wound up?

henetha Fri 17-Oct-14 10:31:09

I completely agree with every word of your post, absent. It's utterly true that it's the little things.. At present I have about 6 small problems, just inconsequential things like the washing machine leaking, etc.,which are driving me mad, and also find huge pleasure in the little things, like the blackbird doing a dance on. the lawn this morning to raise the worms.
If you are superficiial, then so am I... smile.