Recognising a pattern

My dear husband becomes very bossy and controlling when we go shopping together.

No, I'm 70 not came across this in my generation. Dare they try. My dad was not like that either.

but tbh it’s appalling and widespread
Really?

No, I've never noticed any women I know of my age who are scared to disagree with overbearing husbands, including me.

I think some men can be bullies but this is across all age groups but possibly more so amongst younger people now, with some young men following the vile Tate brothers. There seems to be a growing trend in the USA too, as mysognistic views seem to be on the rise there.

Do you live in the USA Horti?

Gosh this sounds horrible. Never encountered it i must say. I'm not a psychological expert so can't comment on narcissism.

Horti

I’ve just been posting on narcissistic behaviours and patterns

I’m recognising a different but similar pattern amongst many retired couples I know

Retired husbands bullying know it all’s
Loud , speak over their wives conversation , increasing volume to get heard above them

Wives being deferential to a point against their best interests often scared to disagree ,going along with it for ‘ peace’ Not being heard

I was told this was gender inequality !!

but tbh it’s appalling and widespread

Anyone recognise this and got any solutions

I must say I've only noticed this kind of behaviour a few times in my life (a pretty long time!). Maybe it's just the company I keep.

Which newspaper you cut and paste your findings from? Like many others here I don't recognise this behaviour in my world. Have you just graduated from Mumsnet where most women seem to hate the men THEY'VE chosen?

I’ve experienced this widely
And recently
I’m pleased to hear you haven’t !
Without push back it gets worse
Misogyny at its worst I agree not narcissism
I know about that too sadly

A narcissist would rarely behave in such a way publicly.

They will come a cross as charming, loving and respectful.

Once in the car or at home the narcisstic behaviour will manifest.

eddiecat78

You live in a very different world from me! I'm 70 and might have noticed this behaviour in my parents' generation but never in my own.

I am 75 and have fortunately never encountered this in the UK.!

Can't say I have witnessed anything like this amongst my friends but bullying can go on in any partnership regardless of age.
My DH certainly would not behave like this its disrespectful regardless of gender.

You live in a very different world from me! I'm 70 and might have noticed this behaviour in my parents' generation but never in my own.

Oops I added but don't know where it went - the woman is the seasoned martyr so the poor husband is constantly made to feel guilty.

I will say that I quite often in supermarkets see what I call 'the dutiful husband' trailing behind a woman of a certain age who is clearly in charge e.g. more than once I've heard the poor man in question being loudly told off "You don't need that!" And the offending item removed from the trolley and returned to the shelf.

So I would say that sort of behaviour comes in the person not whether they're male or female.

As Oreo says none of the women that I know would put up with that.

People control others in so many ways... I've now been reminded of a friend with a meek and mild husband who is a seasoned martyr!

No, can’t say I have noticed this, but all the women that I know wouldn’t allow anything like that to happen.
Probably the older men have always been like that but becoming more noticeable in retirement?