Son in laws behaviour on Mothers day of all days

Fair enough - I hadn't thought of it like that. It just seemed like the thread was turning against the OP unnecessarily, but I take your point.

I think people are responding to the first sentence Doodledog ‘How would people feel’

It doesn't really matter whether it would bother other posters, it bothered the OP, and I think that dragging up previous posts about her MH is horrible.

I'm sorry it put a downer on your day, OP. I hope you've been able to take a step back now and aren't so hurt. Maybe your SIL knew you'd be working and wouldn't have time to chat, so left it to your daughter?

It wouldn’t bother me. I think it’s lovely that they made the effort to drive round to your house. I would expect, once a daughter becomes a mum herself, that the focus is on her day with her children. I had some lovely Mothering Sundays when they were young but I’ve had my time. Sending a card or flowers to Granny is wonderful - you are very lucky that you received a visit. Did they visit the husband’s mum too?

InRainbows

I must say, I would not have noticed, my focus would be on the daughter bringing gifts on what is now an important day for her as well.

Agree. You’re not his mother . If they knew you were working, it was clearly a flying visit. Wouldn’t bother me.

And they would know that Sarnia isn't Sarina! 🤣

ceejayjay

Wow that’s a low blow do people go checking up on old posts to see if they can find any dirt ?

That's not really fair.
People on GN are often quite astute at recognising other posters' names and what they have said in the past.

ceejayjay

Sarnia

Perhaps to have invited them all in would have been nice. Cup of tea and a chat rather than stand on the doorstep. Maybe if he thought your welcome was a bit chilly towards your daughter, he was doing the same.

Thanks for repeating yourself Sarina

My pleasure.

Wow that’s a low blow do people go checking up on old posts to see if they can find any dirt ?

Sarnia

Perhaps to have invited them all in would have been nice. Cup of tea and a chat rather than stand on the doorstep. Maybe if he thought your welcome was a bit chilly towards your daughter, he was doing the same.

Thanks for repeating yourself Sarina

ceejayjay

Redhead56

There is history with this relationship it's obvious there is more to it.

Is there ?

You have mentioned your mental health in some posts, including your agoraphobia.
Maybe your son in law has a problem understanding and accepting this.

And no we don’t get tea breaks. One 30 min lunch on ten hour shift

Last post was reply to Sarina

Jfyi my family are always more than welcome to come in for a cups & do so often Thankyou

It was her choice they was on there way somewhere ? Omg the amount of judgement with people making up facts. I would have loved her to have been able to come in and yes I do get 30 mins lunch but they called too late for me to take lunch at that time as my work has rules!

ceejayjay

Sarnia

Perhaps to have invited them all in would have been nice. Cup of tea and a chat rather than stand on the doorstep. Maybe if he thought your welcome was a bit chilly towards your daughter, he was doing the same.

As ive said i was working a 10 hour shift from home hence the door drop

I wouldn't leave my daughter and granddaughter standing on the doorstep, no matter what. Even working from home gives you time for a tea break and lunch. Your SIL maybe feels your welcome wasn't much of a welcome.

Redhead56

There is history with this relationship it's obvious there is more to it.

Is there ?

There is history with this relationship it's obvious there is more to it.

Yes I can well believe it. We have someone who’s joined the family who’s just like that.
Also what I find rude is getting thanked second hand for presents that I have bought for that person.

Sounds like my late husband. He used to spend a lot of time sitting in the car. He could never see the point of coming to make a bit of small talk. He was the same with his own parents.

Thankyou for all your replies, yes this is normal for him it’s clear he dosnt like me and that’s fine. I felt upset with the situation today as I kept looking to catch his eye so I could smile & wave as that comes natural to me

Sarnia

Perhaps to have invited them all in would have been nice. Cup of tea and a chat rather than stand on the doorstep. Maybe if he thought your welcome was a bit chilly towards your daughter, he was doing the same.

As ive said i was working a 10 hour shift from home hence the door drop

Addicted to his phone: simple as.
I don’t think some people realise how big a thing this is.
I am well aware of how ridiculous that sounds but it’s real.

It’s an over commercialised day.I,dmuch prefer my family not to spend their hard earned cash on things I don’t need and tell them so.
My son and DIL arrived with flowers and cards and a parcel from my daughter who has her very recently widowed FIL staying with her.
It’s not something that would worry me if I never received a present or card ever again. They speak to us daily or pop in when they are passing that’s what’s important.Not cards or gifts.My mum used to say don’t bring flowers when I,m dead spend time with me while I,m alive

Put these in your vase, Sarahr 💐 x

Such a sad fact of life now. The phone has taken away friendliness.
Even if he was giving you time with your dd and gd it wouldn't have hurt to get out of the car, wish you a Happy Mother's Day, then excused himself so you had mum and daughter/Granddaughter time. On the other hand, maybe you could have gone over and asked him in.
I'm glad your daughter and Granddaughter made time for you.
Sadly, I have an empty vase on the mantlepiece.