It's all very well, those of you saying, 'Talk, circulate!' But not all of us are good at that. I'm not. I hate it and I'm bad at it even when I try. It's called social anxiety.
My bloke is VERY outgoing and loves talking to anyone. I get more and more anxious in that environment, and eventually cramp his style and stop him enjoying himself fully. It's why we compromise. Sometimes he goes alone. If it's an event where I'm expected/needed to be, I go but leave once I've had enough.
He gets his frantic social whirl and I get my own space and peace and quiet.
You can't hold everyone to the same standards.
Gransnet forums
Relationships
I've been married nearly 30 years and DH has always done this so no surprise each time. When we go to weddings funerals etc he leaves me on my own to table hop, 'work the room' etc. I don't know most of the people (or have only met them superficially once or sometimes twice over the years). He says this is the only opportunity he has to get to know these relatives (he makes sporadic attempts to contact them by phone etc but it doesn't really come to much). I try to make the effort and chat to whoever's around but usually they're there as couples and soon ignore me and I end up on my own at a table feeling like an idiot or sitting in the foyer pretending to look at mobile (!) My solution now is to stop going to these events except for essentials eg father-in-laws funeral when it happens. I don't have family do's to go to - so its his family events. Should I keep pushing myself to go to these things or just not put myself thru this any more? 
Join the conversation
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join the discussion, watch threads and lots more.
Register now »Already registered? Log in with:
Gransnet »