Unexpected and scary

Home turf! You can always have both - the home date and the weekend away (if the former goes well).

Good luck

Definitely the second option on so many counts.
I could not have shared a room with anyone I didn't know well, or he may not be suggesting that.
If he was expecting to and you didn't exactly gel, how awkward would that be,
Ask him for a meal, without the expectation of staying over and see how it goes.

I totally agree, home turf is best to start with.

Have you met each others friends at all yet? As you are quite serious about him, might it be good to meet up as a group with some of your friends ad see how that goes. Good luck, be happy.

Perhaps he thinks it would be easier for you to sleep with him for the first time away from home? This definitely needs to be discussed with him. Could you go away and have single rooms and see how you feel while you are away?

Have others (eg friends and family) met this man? If not, I would certainly not invite him to my house and be alone with him. How well do you really know him?

On the other hand, if he has met friends and/or family and is becoming part of your wider life then by all means ask him round for ‘supper’ and see where it goes,

I’m thinking about your safety.

How few is a few dates one or two or lots ?
All I can add is do be careful not everyone is as they seem but hopefully he’s a good bloke and you have lots of future fun
I m also not sure about the alone at home scenario surely if you go away for the weekend out of respect he will have booked two single rooms and then if you want to change the arrangement you can
Enjoy yourself

Lucky you !

Be a good detective, did you meet him online?
Have you done a drive by of his home?
Have you met his friends and family?
Have you checked out his FB page or Twitter, or Linkdin?
Have you googled his name?
If all of your answers are No, then don’t do either of your posted options until you can answer yes to all 4 questions.
Hopefully question 1 is a no.

Actually if it were me (I am cautious) I would first invite him supper. Just supper and maybe a cuddle on the sofa. No more the first time. Has he been to yours before?

If that went well, I'd then think about the next step. Don't rush things, he will wait, if he's really a lovely understanding person.

He is a retired architect who used to work with my husband, he lost his wife to cancer 2 yrs ago so I do know his background. We met by chance at a party the first dates were quite casual and companionable then he took me to a dinner dance. I hadn't danced up close to a man for many years the affect was dramatic and very scary, so you can understand that if I do get taken on a long weekend I don't want to spoil it by my lack of confidence.

Thanks for the clarification . Since you do know him / his background, and you have been on a few casual dates, I'd say that you are ready for "the next step". I'd go with the weekend away - life is too short for wasting time with further dates as if you were an innocent teenager.

Tell him that you are worried about rushing into something you are not ready for - I'm sure that since you already know him well, he'll be understanding about the sex part of things. Ask for separate rooms, and if things work out you can change the arrangement. Best wishes to you !

Invite him in after a dinner date to see your 'etchings'..
Good luck!

aaaaaahhh How lovely ! If you tell him you are a little shy this will only make him adore you more.........I'd go on the weekend with him. I'm sure he will understand how you feel. Confide in him a little.

Be honest with him. Ask him over for a meal and talk to him. Tell him he is first man you have dated since death of dh. Tell him you enjoy his company but want to take things slowly. Agree to weekend away and insist on single rooms and see how you feel once away from home. Don't be rushed into anything.

Go for it, life is short

Relax, go with the flow and remember you can back out at any stage just explaining that you are not ready. Why not chat beforehand and let him know your slight anxiety, that way he will fully understand. Good luck ....

Yes, stick to a 'home' date. Good luck - hope it all turns out well for you.

I agree with Grannyknot - have the meal in at home and if things go well, enjoy the weekend break. If you enjoy his company and he's genuine, you can show one another how you feel, but don't feel pressurised into anything you aren't comfortable with. Do hope it goes really well, and keep us posted!

Remember STDs are on the rise fastest in the over 50s.

I’m sorry, it’s not pleasant to bring up but please be safe!!

Arrange separate rooms and a means to return home alone if necessary. You need to stay in control of the situation.

I wonder if the reason he has suggested a weekend away because it is neutral territory. I am not sure if his house is where he lived with his late wife and your home is where you lived with your late husband and maybe he thinks that he does not want to do anything in either of those places and sees a weekend away as being a place just for you and him.
It would be best to discuss your worries about intimacy, he may have worries too.
Whatever happens I wish you and him all the very best for a great weekend.

It sounds like you’re ready for love.

Go for it and good luck.

Life's too short! Sieze the moment. Enjoy a special weekend away.....why so much concentration on the bed part? Who knows.....he may have his own issues in the department and be looking forward to simply sharing an affectionate and fun weekend with someone whose company he enjoys.

Go for the weekend away, a lovely say out, dinner, a drink and you will be totally relaxed not worrying about what the neighbours will think or the dust on table. Enjoy