Is she right?

"I like them" or "I like those earrings". Sometimes the second is abbreviated to "I like those", but almost always with a clear gesture towards what you are referring to (e.g. point at them). Can I ascend my own heights of arrogance or sink to unprecedented depths of stupidity by saying that the common currently accepted usage is "by the bye" (as in byway or minor path). Sorry…

Thank you Crafting and every body else (nearly)

Crafting, I love your post !

Izabella I once drove to work listening to chirpy chatter on the radio whilst on of my sons was in despair about being made redundant and my DH was due to go to surgery for an operation which may have killed him or left him brain damaged. As I was driving I thought about all the people in the world who had no worries whilst I was going mad with anxiety. The answer is we all care (well most people do) about what is going on in the world around us, but we would all sink into despair if that's all we thought about. Every second thousands are being born, killed, tortured, starved, saved, happy sad etc. When some are very very happy, at the same second others are very very sad. We have to make the most of the time we have and if that is responding to threads on GN so be it. We are not all uncaring just getting on with life as best we can. (This response to your post is not meant in anyway to be nasty or critical)

Back to the OP I think your sister was mean to correct you I'd tell her you think they're horrible next time

Surely it is the height of bad manners to correct someone's grammar when having a conversation with him or her. It is, of course, the height of stupidity to "correct" something that isn't wrong in the first place.

Sisters, who'd have 'em? Mine went over the top when my DS at 12 year old omitted to saying please when asking for a drink (he didn't drink alcohol, being 12 and it was all there was on the table so asked for juice). You would have thought he had chopped her head off! Goodness, she went all out at him for not having his manners. Only a few weeks after starting home schooling because of severe bullying too, and on Christmas Day! Needless to say, we didn't bother going again. I know manners are important and I have brought them up using them, obviously, but to jump down his throat over it was out of order.

Either is acceptable, but next time I just wouldn't comment.

I think it is quite in order to use either - although I suppose it might be a different story if you didn't like them!

The bottom line is that you can choose your friends but not your relatives as I know to my cost. I expect this is symptomatic of the whole relationship and so I offer to you the advice I give myself when 'duty socialising' , "Rise above it and either pretend it never happened or just laugh"

In spite of my comments above I would never correct anyone, friend family or acquaintance! It's just plain rude and offensive to do so! I only commented because we were asked!

Melanie

After "earringgate" how did the rest of your time together go? What did you do for fun?

I ask this really because I've got a wedding to go to where we didn't receive an invitation, my husband's daughter made them and just commented when we told her, that she'd got one, but didn't offer to do us another, didn't get invited to the hen party that the real grandmas and aunties got invited to either (photos all over facebook). (I'm step grandma). I can appreciate the slight and this sort of thing does tend to upset and colour one's judgement.

Or you could tell her you still like them but you're not keen on her manners: correcting your speech when you're being positive and friendly.

Or 'those'...

Next time, tell her you dont like them !

Unless, of course, the OP had said 'I like them!' in the tone one would use when saying 'I like it!'...

It depends entirely in the context of the conversation! eg if she said 'look at my new earrings' and you said 'I like them' it would be fine.
Obviously 'I like them earrings' would be wrong!
But if she said 'what do you think of these earrings?' 'I like those' would be wrong!
If you started the conversation by saying 'I like them' and pointing then that's wrong too , it should be 'I like those!'

Iam68now. Thank you, although I do not consider it a slap down. However, if I may put my post into some sort of context? Immediately before venturing onto this thread (for the first time) I had been viewing a particularly distressing video of theatre staff doing intracranial surgery on the hospital floor in Aleppo in the most dreadful conditions.

I must admit that I had never looked at this thread before and came on to see what what being discussed. As a former front line nurse who has worked all over the world in sometimes dreadful situations most cannot imagine, it probably should not have been the most natural thread to peruse for me. I naturally find preoccupation with such discussions hard to understand, but that is because of my life experiences and not because I have a gripe with either the OP or Ana's post.

Having studied both etymology and the English language at post graduate level I do understand how some people react as in the OP's statement. I was merely caught off guard and upset over a situation I have no control of - much like the changing state of the English Language, which "ain't wot it used ta be sithee like".

Melanie. May I suggest that you check your knickers this morning, it very much appears that you have them on in a twist.

Izabella ignore the slap down you'll get use to it.

Watch out for the "TROLLS"

Blimey

The point of the discussion is "I like them" or "I like those" - which is correct. What you have done is veered the discussion around to your infinite superiority. Really? "I love your earrings" would have been a better thing to say. Well how enlightening. I'd better just get into my time machine and go back and correct myself.

I am just saying what I would have said. That is my point

Shanma - kinda missing the point. Or put the correct way "You are slightly missing the point".

I would have said " I love your Earrings"

I agree with luckygirl. You were using the pronoun 'them' to avoid repeating the noun 'earrings', as you would in 'There are a lot of ants around today. I don't like them.'
'those' is specifying a choice between various options: 'Most ants are black, but those are red.' ( I don't know why I chose ants )

Absolutely!

This is pedants' corner. I'm sure we're all aware of the terrible things going on in the real world, thank you Izabella.