Anxiety attacks

Carenza
Are you able to help him when he has an attack. I was shown this simple technique many years ago.
Of course this isn’t going to take 2 minutes, but keep going.
Take the person out of the situation.
Hold their hands.
Get them to look you in the eye and hold that contact.
Then do deep breathing with them.
You must keep them holding eye contact.
I wish you well.

So sad, but lathyrus is right.

He must be allowed to do as little or as much as he feels capable of.

Having had many a panic attack as a young teenager at school in front of everyone (and been laughed at) it has affected my whole life , and my ability to socialise with regard to how many will be there, who they are and how ‘loud’ they are.

I have coping tactics learned over a life time, but I still have to be allowed to decide for myself what I can and cannot attend.

If you are talking him starting meds and counselling 4/5 months ago Carenza123 its very early days for a very serious anxiety condition.

People can't change that quickly. It doesn't sound like he had much counselling - real change takes long term counselling (and a total willingness to engage)

I think Lathyrus has a good practical solution for now. Managing situations, him not going into ones that produce extreme anxiety.

Just let him stay at home and everybody else go to the family gathering and enjoy themselves.

I have a close relative who has suffered in the same way for many years. She has a restricted life but one that she is comfortable with.