Anxiety and the famous

the latest brain research has proved that faking it works. So when you feel scared act brave and you will become it. Smile and you will feel happy. I know it sounds trite but it is true. Believe it. You can do it!

There is a general increase in anxiety amongst most of us simply because life is not as settled as it used to be in our pasts. Rush, rush is all around us and the frenetic ways in which some people have to work goes into our subconscious.

However, there are things we can do to help. Getting out into the countryside and just enjoying a walk is one of them. Getting back to nature is calming. Get away from traffic and noise. Take time to rest out there and just contemplate the sky and scenery. Do that as often as possible.

Exercise is also good. Using a good gym at times when it is quiet and you can proceed at a pace that suits you rather than feeling you must 'improve'. If there is 'music' see if you can get it turned off or down. Close your mind to what is around you and simply enjoy the exercises.

Meet some like minded friends occasionally with no time limit. Regardless of the quality of any drink use a quiet cafe or pub. If you have a good public park nearby visit that and watch other people, or ducks, swans etc., from a suitable vantage point.

Take control of your life rather than your lifestyle taking control over you.

I have had panic attacks and depression and anxiety for years, tried all sorts of things. Honestly, I think most people have this going on at sometime in their lives and just get on with it somehow because they have to.

We are not very in touch with our feelings, people often tell me they are anxious when they mean excited, depressed when they mean sad. Nothing wrong with any of it and we do get to make some choices.

The market is flooded with self help books and the NHS provides Mindfulnes and CBT, so it is something that millions are coping with and they are all walking about, going to work, getting the shopping etc.

I find not watching or listening to news of any kind, no documentaries that might be upsetting, even soaps which are all doom and gloom, can help, we are burdened now but non stop anxiety making media reports and dark programmes.

Try to do something physical everyday, something intellectual, something emotional, something social......

You need to keep your own inner energies flowing.

All the celebs claim to have things which they feel will keep them in the limelight, especially since the royals have started their angst fest, you need to ask yourself if it benefits you in some way and if it doesn't, take some time off.

Give yourself 2 hours a day when you are completely distracted by a good book, hot bath or film whatever takes you mind off it, and then extend those 2 hous to a morning, when you go out or have a mate round sometimes these modern conditions of anxiety etc are just routines we set ourselves.

Take control of it, you might not be able to get rid of it (I can't) but you can manage it better.

Some good advice here, which I will attempt to take! Anxiety has made me very self centred. It's 'what if I die, faint, pass out, collapse, shake, have a turn, can't speak. What if my ache or pain is fatal? .'... me me me.
Never mind that my poor husband has cancer (in remission). It's all about me and I hate myself for it.

Hi Daisydoo2. Have you heard of Charles Linden? He was a sufferer and has devised a method which has really helped, in fact cured, many, many people. I’m in no way connected so not gaining anything from this by the way. You can buy hard copy or a download. It isn’t cheap but I urge you to go online and have a look, just google......The Linden Method or Charles Linden.
I also recommend Dr Claire Weekes books....’Self help for your nerves’ or ‘ Peace from nervous suffering’.
Anxiety is dreadful and can ruin lives but it can be made manageable and even cured. Good luck

I know that it's a terrible cliché, but that saying "feel the fear & do it anyway" seems to work. The buzz one feels after tackling something scary, helps when the next scary situation arises. I also find the advice to fake it helps (even if you are having difficulty controlling shaking hands & legs) I live alone, so have very little choice, as I have no one to do these things for me. Oh to be one of these people brimming with self-confidence!

OP- radicalnan mentions several things I would have suggested. Perhaps start by sitting quietly and breathing slowly and deeply for a few minutes. This morning I almost didn't bother to go to tai chi. I did go and, as ever, found an hour's gentle exercise with a calm but humorous leader left me happier in mind and more confident in body. Looking at autumn leaves and sunsets also helps.
If you feel like it spend 5 minutes writing, writing anything which comes into your head. No need to show anyone unless you want to share, this is yours, for you.
Many people I know personally have benefitted from reading 'Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway' - one gradually emerged from years of crippling social anxiety and OCD. He also had help from a local hospital and contact with a Buddhist group.
I hope life improves for you.

Very interesting post. I lose confidence very quickly and feel inferior to other people. Went to a friends party at the weekend and feel that that she manages everything much better than I do. Am overweight lazy,hoarder etc. Trying to fight it but it's difficult. And it makes me anxious.
I do believe in small steps. And writing lists to plan solving the problems.
Small things make a difference. Asked about an eyeliner at a store the other day and it gives me a boost each time I use it.
Remember when I was working, handing over a patient to another ward if you sounded unsure they would ask lots of questions. Took a patient to ITU and made an effort to confidently rattle through the information. Lo and behold they accepted all the handover and I went quickly back to my ward.

I'm also someone who has suffered for years, in fact I think I had anxiety as a child but thought how I felt was how everyone else felt, as I was always worrying excessively about things.
I was also a member of No Panic many years ago when I had become housebound with agoraphobia.
I love the Claire Weekes books, they may be a little dated now, but a lot of the current treatments available seem to be based on her premise of acceptance.
I am not a fan at all of The Linden Method, in fact he makes claims on his site which are false and is currently being investigated by the ASA.
I posted a little while ago about going on my first holiday in 44yrs with my partner. In the 20yrs we've been together we've never had a holiday, in fact we've rarely even been out for the whole day as my anxiety has limited me so much.
On Saturday we went on our holiday and I had such a bad time adjusting to a new place that we ended up coming home again later that evening as we couldn't get the TV or the internet to work and they have always been my distractions when my anxiety is bad.
We returned the next morning, had a lovely day exploring Bourton on the Water, only for me to be totally unable to sleep and having to leave at 6am the following morning to come home yet again.
We are hoping to go back again either tomorrow or Friday as I truly believe that the only way to get through this terrible disability is by repetition.
As for all these celebs who claim to have these disorders yet are cured so quickly I think that most likely as they are financially able to get professional help perhaps their anxiety is nipped in the bud before it really affects their lives.

I was crippled by anxiety for years , till I was prescribed Citalopram . I'm told I will always need to take it , but it has saved me . There's no shame in medication .

As Dannirae suggest it is a good start to read a self help book and note the ideas you think would help you and then as other people have suggested create helpful routines. You may find this book helpful:
www.humangivens.com/product/how-to-master-anxiety

If you do you may want to engage a Human Givens Therapist to help you. They aim to work quickly over as few sessions as possible building strategies on your strengths and helping you lead a more satisfying life.

You might well along side this ask your GP for some suportive medication or go herbal and seek calming teas and pills etc.

As one of the people in this thread suggested breathing is important and the usual method is called seven eleven, that is count 7 as you breath in and 11 as you breath out. This is explained in this pdf.

www.liferesolutions.co.uk/uploads/pdfs/7%2011%20fact%20sheet.pdf

Hope you feel better soon.

So much good advice on here and so reassuring, it is so easy to feel very alone in my head. The pretending has gone well today, I feel like I am on that old programme when the person's comes out and says "today Matthew I'm going to be ...." Yes my humour is slightly off centre, but I have been out... twice for a short time... imagining myself as a very confident motivational speaker... not that I spoke a word.. but I could have done! Well I have to think big.

Daisydoo2 if you haven't already done so, read the book Don't Sweat the Small Stuff (and it's all small stuff) by Richard Carlson. That and some other reading did more for me than all the years of antidepressants and therapy. It was the start of realising that nothing lasts for ever, keeping things in proportion and basically changing how I viewed the world. I hope you find your own way through the mire.

Try not to compare yourself with anyone else. Someone once told me "compare and despair"

A lifetime of anxiety has been hard but the best things that have helped me are meditation and Cognitive behavioural therapy.

The first calms the mind and body. The second helps me organise my thoughts and deal with the negatives.

Not saying it always works, but I feel loads better than I did.

I hope you find the right help and soon feel better.

I like the sound of "Don't Swear the Small Stuff" so I have just ordered a copy on line (2nd hand) - thank you Crazygrandma!!

Phoenix & Musicelf; I developed (inherited) late life asthma in my 40's and for many years I was prescribed a large variety of treatments but additionally always reached for my Ventolin inhaler in hope of a 'quick fix', particularly when stressful situations arose at work. Then, 9/10 yrs ago I needed to go on a nebulizer at the local surgery. After 1/2 hr treatment it was realised that the Ventolin used was having absolutely no effect, so I was given a short course of prednisolone (sorry, to waffle but I'll explain my purpose shortly). My asthma is now very well controlled with twice daily Salbutamol and I have since not used Ventolin at all. I have recently learned that it has proved ineffectual & caused various problems for some others. So, may I tentatively suggest you read the following article:- www.livestrong.com/article/265998-asthma-medicines-that-cause-anxiety/

Musicelf .I question how supportive your DH is if he knows how debilitating your insecurity is?
Of course you can't hide away from meeting people but retiring to your cabin on a cruise because you don't want to meet other folk is no holiday for you or DH
Taking tablets is not the answer it is temporary relief but could become addictive Have you not considered therapy?

I too have benefited from meditation and C.B.T. I write to express my fears and feelings. I 'tap' (N.L.p.) I praise myself for every small achievement. My counsellor also suggested counting things to distract myself when suffering from acrophobia I.e. Black cars, red cars etc. It is worth exploring many avenues to find what works for you. Believe you will get better!

You are most welcome DanniRae I hope it helps you as much as it did me. I realised it was my ingrained mindset that needed to change. Since reading it back in 2006 I have never felt the need to reach for the antidepressants. I take pride in the fact that I have faced several monumental life events without them. Our brains are incredibly powerful. I learned to stop listening to the inner negative voice :-)

Ye you have my sympathy too.

I have found it helps to consider if I will be physically harmed by doing whatever it is - never so far.
Then think about being the other side of the problem; the peace after the experience is over.
And then, keeping that in mind, pretend that I am coping.
Taking the first step is always the worst part so, deep breath and step into the future. Once started things usually carry you along and you can then see the light at the end of the tunnel and work towards it.

It sometimes helps me to break going away into segments, first I deal with getting in the car and doing the journey, then going into the hotel/house or wherever, only then do I think about eating and I also find it helps if I think not sleeping one/two nights won't hurt me. Also it can help to concentrate on OH and making a happy time for him. I agree with LJP1 about thinking about being out the other side a bit like with small children when we tell them mum will be back in 2 sleeps. Generally this is a horrible problem and I go between thinking its best to put up a fight or following the acceptance way of doing things. Just try one thing at a time.

My sympathies are with you, it's really horrible to feel as you do.
I recommend a book: At last a life by Paul David
Good luck and be kind to yourself. x

I find meditation and Buddhist type philosophy has greatly helped me overcome negative thoughts to some extent. Am not a Buddhist but some of the ideas are very wise and helpful in putting things in perspective in this mad world.

I would recommend a mindfulness course. It sounds simple, basically breathing. But has helped me a lot. There's an app called headspace that does first 10 sessions for free. You can keep repeating them, it's 10 minutes a day, or pay a few pounds for next level. I also signed up to a group locally where we practise it. Has helped me through all sorts.

I keep thinking I should try mindfulness. I really should.