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Welcome to the *Gransnet Café. This is a non-judgemental space for you to pop in for a cuppa with some virtual friends, seek out advice for a particular problem, or share an update on your life - important or trivial. Feel free to have your say and chat about your day, but please leave any arguments at the door. If you're struggling to find someone to talk to in real life, or are simply looking for a bit of a chat, this is the place for you.

Friends using messages instead of picking up the phone

(81 Posts)
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Pleasebenice Thu 28-May-26 07:07:00

I use messages to send a single quick message but I have friends who use channels like WhatsApp to have a long conversation. I try to divert to a call but they get annoyed or don’t answer. If I am busy or even just reading my book, a long written chat is much more disturbing than a nice phone call. Is that just me?

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Eloethan Sun 31-May-26 12:00:11

Some people don't particularly like talking on the phone. I have never been that comfortable, unless I know someone really well. Without visual cues, I find it difficult to judge the mood of the conversation or when to speak.

My reluctance has nothing to do with the advent of texts but I have read that young people are extremely reluctant to use the phone, and some are actually fearful of doing so. That is presumably the result of people living their lives online and feeling more vulnerable using a less controlled method of communication. I can understand that in a way - with texts you choose exactly when to communicate and what to say - and have time to consider how you will reply.

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Norah Sun 31-May-26 17:37:22

Eloethan

Some people don't particularly like talking on the phone. I have never been that comfortable, unless I know someone really well. Without visual cues, I find it difficult to judge the mood of the conversation or when to speak.

My reluctance has nothing to do with the advent of texts but I have read that young people are extremely reluctant to use the phone, and some are actually fearful of doing so. That is presumably the result of people living their lives online and feeling more vulnerable using a less controlled method of communication. I can understand that in a way - with texts you choose exactly when to communicate and what to say - and have time to consider how you will reply.

Eloethan Some people don't particularly like talking on the phone.

Me - I hate to waste time on the phone.

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Veritys Sat 08-Aug-26 13:38:22

I remember when the phone ringing was exciting as a friend would be calling to suggest going out. No one chats anymore as humans voice contact is what we are built for. Not hunched backed over a mobile texting. I volunteer as a phone friend. We phone a person and actually talk. No texting. There's a loneliness epidemic in the world. Dial a number and take the time to appreciate your friend.

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Romola Sat 08-Aug-26 17:21:47

I'm with M0nica. I love hearing people's voices.
Living alone, I really value being able to have a catch-up chat with friends, including those who live overseas, via WhatsApp.
I never mind a tv programme being interrupted. If it's any good, there's BBCiplayer or similar. Real contact with a real person comes first for me.

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Blossoming Sat 08-Aug-26 17:43:29

Guilty as charged! My various impairments mean I find it easier to text. ( Ido still speak to people on the phone too).

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