Passing down family name

Someone I worked with many years ago had to call her firstborn son Selwyn as it was a family name, all I could think of was the sit-com 'Oh no! It's Selwyn Froggat!' Luckily she and husband got to chose the second name and I think the child was known as that.

A good friend's mother disliked the name they chose for their first born son so much she refused to use it to begin with!

A baby's name is totally down to the parents. It is absolutely their right to choose.
There were vast generations of Williams in my husbands family, and I was given no choice but to call our eldest son William... very much against the grain though.
But, son William and his wife rebelled when they had their son... he has it as his second name, which in my opinion is perfectly acceptable.
Just enjoy the new baby whatever his name.

Mercifully there has been no discernible passing down of first names on either side of my family, or DW's, though some have recently been chosen as second names, freely chosen by the parents, not by GPs, who have been duly flattered.

Ancestry .com would probably have imploded if I had been coping with a tradition of one eldest son's name to accompany one of the commonest surnames in the UK.

This should so be the choice of the parents in my opinion. I inherited a name and didn't like it though I couldn't care less now. I certainly wasn't going to pass it on to my daughter. Son got his middle name as a sort of tribute to his grandfather rather than passed on from his father. Nice name fortunately. But when he and his wife proposed using her surname, which she wasn't changing, as their first born's surname on his birth certificate there was huge disapproval and my son caved in. Pity as her surname is much nicer than ours but it would have meant the family name dying out as his was the only male line and older relations were horrified. They compromised by using her surname as one of the children's 'given names'.
We had enough trouble in our house from having three of the six of us with the same initial.

It's hurtful, but it's def their choice, and no worth falling out over.

I have read people's responses and although I agree you will both have to accept the name(s) they chose, I think it's a little harsh to say 'get over it'! I can quite understand that your DH is hurt, when it's been a family tradition for so long and which he fully expected to be continued. But I'm afraid he will have to grin and bear it as the last thing you want is a family rift over this. I'm sure that in time you'll get used to the name chosen, ans we have with our grandchildren some of whom have names we wouldn't have chosen!
However, in my DHs family there's been a tradition of a family name as second name for several generations and our eldest son's first son also has that name, which we were pleased about. But we wouldn't have commented if he hadn't!

Not seen any responses from NewGM yet. I hope OP's at least acknowledge or thank gransnetters for their advice even if they dodn't like it.

Being a NewGM I think her post will help her an others understand their role as Grandparents.

I agree with some of the comments about family trees. Some of my ancestors had the same first name for several generations which makes it vey confusing when trying to work out which is which! But that tradiation was broken a couple of generations ago, and the name retained as a second name for some members of the family.
Also as someone mentioned, a member of my DHs family died aged 3 and a second son was given exactly the same name which caused me a lot of confusion when trying to trace ancestors as the dates given on censuses and birth certificates just didnt tally. We would never do that these days!
And the family name I mentioned was indeed a mother's surname some generations back.

The Mother and Father of the child are entitled to call it whatever they like. Just because you have the tradition it does not mean that they have to. However, old fashioned names are all the rage now so they might have thought about it as a middle name just to keep the peace. They didn't so you will have to get used to it. I was glad my child was not called after his Father's middle name, his Grandfather, Great Grandfather, before him were called Albert. I could not agree to my child being called that so we settled for another family name instead.

Sorry but you have no right to expect a say in naming their child. Get over it and enjoy being grandparents.

Once the GC gets older hopefully you will see the name suits him and what a mistake it would have been to use the family name. I have just realised my name has been handed down through the years and it wasn't used for my GD. I never gave it a thought as the parents chose her name and what a beautiful name it is. Enjoy your Grandson and forget about the name tradition.

One of the pleasures with a new baby is choosing a name. Don't spoil it for these new parents. Your husband will have to get over it.

I thought this thread was gong to be about surnames. My Dad was a bit upset when Mum only had girls, and the family name would be lost forever.
I've written before about ours being a female dominated family - he had no brothers, only sisters. And no uncles or grand-uncles.
I called our oldest John, like Dad, but he has called his oldest a different name.

We have two family names - one from the Jewish ancestry side, passed from father to son. My DH hates it (his 3rd name) and we decided not to give it to DS. But MIL's father was George, his first son and GS were both George and we called our lump George while expecting, but were not intending it to stick. Guess what? Great-grandad was so chuffed that we decided to choose a non-family name for DS; kept George as second name and we kept my maiden name as his 3rd name, as I'm the last in family line. Everyone happy. The main problem with family names is that no-one knows which "George" we're talking about!

Always had a penchant for royalty.My two DD's are Victoria and Elizabeth but frequently referred to by friends and some members of the family as Liz and Vic.

My son would be Fred...no thanks. My sil Gertrude..again no thanks. Fashions change. The family name goes through the surname surely??

A family member had the same problem with her in laws who were insisting her child was given a family name. In fact it caused quite a rift for a while because the parents of the baby didn't like the name and called the baby something else (a much nicer, classic name)
Just enjoy this new little family member and don't get hung up on a name.

This O.P. needs to be referred to all those dreadfully sad discussions we've had on here about GPs loosing contact with their GC....then they would learn what's really important!
Being a good Grandparent is all about supporting your children to do the most rewarding and difficult job in the world - if you are very lucky you then get to a Grandparent......starting off in this way is going to make that a very fraught ride! Please just let it go and be loving and supportive to your children - its a tough world out there and being petty about some standing name is really only for those with thrones to worry about!

It's just a name, nothing more, nothing to get hurt about. What about DIL's father? He may have been hurt if your tradition had continued.

I'm the eldest child and thankfully my grandparents had stopped the family tradition of add the middle name Aloysius to all the first born.

One of the names my DD was looking at for her DS was Thomas, name of her DH's father and grandfather and also the name of my DS. Glad they went with Thomas as a middle name as I felt they would be taking something away from my DS!

More complicated than dogs pedigrees

Having both my Dad, my brother and uncle with the same name, before my kid was born I said I wouldn't name it that name if it was a boy. Thankfully it was a girl and my DH and I chose a name we both loved and that had never been used before. Just be glad the baby is healthy and enjoy the time being a grandparent. Life is simply too short to bare a grudge / animosity over something so trivial.

conners13 really? taking something away?

As someone keen on researching family history, the same name being used down the generations is a nightmare - I have to log them like kings - James I, James II etc. And then naming a baby after the previous one that had died ... A totally different name is so easy to work from in comparison.