Grandad is worrying about retiring

After a good break then a new interest which involves him dong something he will feel has a purpose and a point. My DH was like this but after training as a Bowls Coach he feels he is helping other people to find a new interest and to make new friends and get exercise. (This is a voluntary role).
I am a walking netball host having not played netball for 40 years- my group gave me the most beautiful card and present last week when we completed our first year. they said netball has livened up their lives and helped them make 25 new friends.
You have to wait a while to find your niche. Any golf club will welcome all helpers with open arms.

Thank you Teetime that’s very encouraging

Most people who retire and are worried about filling their time then wonder how they found the time to go to work.
Maybe find a walking group, do some voluntary work, have outings together, we often do days at the seaside, join NT.

Would definitely recommend the voluntary work route -there are loads of opportunities out there!

Thank you Silverlining48 and womblekelly. That makes sense

Volunteer work is definitely the way to go. There is a huge choice and you can volunteer in almost any capacity - the choice is as wide as a career choice- you just don't get paid. You do however get plenty to fill your time, get you out of the house, use your brain and get like minded colleagues to socialise with.

Either join or arrange a small group to walk one morning a week. Just chatting as you go, friends bringing friends is wonderful, meeting interesting people and discovering the beautiful countryside on your doorstep. That'll lead to other things. You'll feel great afterwards, possibly tired, but feeling you've exercised and had a lovely time.

DH is a 'worker' & his identity very much tied up in his "job". He has slowly reduced his work commitments but, in my opinion ?, he has not been pro active in seeking new things to fill the spaces. We do have a goid circle of friends, we share common interests and are quite busy. However if he could say e.g . I help to organise.... or I do a couple of days at the..... I think he would feel much more purposeful. Some days he is looking for " things to do" & that is annoying!!

The thing about retirement is it needs planning like anything in life.
You can't just retire and do nothing you would be bored to tears.
I looked on retirement as another part of life, a time when I could do all the things I had wanted to do but didn't have the time to do in my working life.
My husband missed the camaraderie from his working life but was able to replace this by joining our local bowling club which he loves.
I took on too much voluntary work originally but now have a lovely life. U3A offer many interest groups which you can join for a annual subscription. I am in a walking group, do classes at the gym to keep fit, learned how to sail, have an interest in photography and family history, travel, love gardening. Life is good.

NannyGla I can so sympathise with your husband I had retirement forced on me at 68 I managed to string it out to 69 but then had to go I hated every minute of not getting up for work Living alone it was my social life as well, my reason to talk to people, to even see people, it didn’t help because I had just lost first Dad then Mum in six months I suddenly had nothing but my saving light was getting involved with voluntary work now three days a week I wake up with a smile on my face I could happily do five days but I m aware I mustn’t put all my eggs in one basket so I don’t allow myself to but I need the structure, the reason to get up, to feel useful and alive

Wise words by everyone.
I especially agree that retirement brings a sense of 'no longer being a contributor to the community or society' f
feeling which can lead to depression.
So I too agree that volunteer work could be an option.

Also, bear in mind, both of you, that whatever he does, he'll probably find the transition from work to leisure, quite hard. Most of us do and it's perfectly normal.

I don't know what his job was but is it possible to do it on an ad hoc basis? My retired uncle was a motor mechanic and continued repairing cars and bikes for friends as well as running 'beginner' classes in the garage a couple of nights a week for keen local teenagers.

So if he has skills or hobbies of any description that he can pass on, he may consider that. Do young people want golf instruction I wonder?

Choose the volunteer work carefully though, it has to be something in an area he would really enjoy.
After that initial period of getting used to not having the old routine, I am absolutely sure you will both begin to enjoy his retirement.