Why do I torture myself

I see what you're saying CafeAuLait but as it was Elless son who approached her the other day with his child who she'd never seen, I don't think her sending birthday cards would be wrong.

It's a catch 22 isn't it, she may be damned if she does and damned if she doesn't.

I agree cafeaulait a non birthday related note, it was lovely to see you I'm sorry we missed your wedding, please can we get back into contact and work on our relationship, might get Elless an answer about how to go forward without my upset

any that should say, not my

Smileless2012

I see what you're saying CafeAuLait but as it was Elless son who approached her the other day with his child who she'd never seen, I don't think her sending birthday cards would be wrong.

It's a catch 22 isn't it, she may be damned if she does and damned if she doesn't.

Yes, context is everything here. Elless can assess that for herself but I'm just saying, consider the context and clarify if necessary to make sure things are received the right way.

I think that sounds lovely Violetsky. Having talked with her son recently this could be a good way to follow up.

Gosh. I can't begin t imagine how this feels. Sorry. Your own health and self care is paramount but have you thought of ringing your son and saying exactly what your post says. You've got this operation but this is torture and say I don't expect you to answer now, but how can we rebuild this please.

There needs to be an open and honest conversation. The missed wedding is not down to the behaviour of just one or the other, it was a combination of both.

Elless has apologised and hopefully her H will offer an apology too. Their son also needs to apologise for his part if there's to be a way of moving forward.