So, how are we all doing ?

How wonderful for you, you must be so excited! It is also encouraging to hear that the parents haven't taken the 'no-one must see our baby for two weeks, we need time to bond' approach. Many congratulations, enjoy this special time.

Congratulations to KG1241!! Lovely news!

And heartfelt commiserations to Madeleine and Nancy, 🫰and 🙏 for better times for both of you in 2025. 🌤️🌈

Oh congratulations 🎊

I’m a Grandma, baby girl born yesterday evening, going to meet her this afternoon 💕🍼

NancyJ I am so sorry you have gone three days with no response to your post.

I think in a situation like yours, it is impossible to give advice. Yours is a sad story. You do at least have some secondhand knowledge of what your grandchildren are up to, but the whys and wherefors of estrangement are difficult to entangle.

In my own family two entirely different views of the same events mean that I have a very distanced relationship with my sister. Even though our DF's death, brought some understanding, my sister finds it difficult to overcome 40 years of blaming me for something I did not do. The difficult events of your DD's last years may have affected both your SiL and grandchildren and their view of you.

No consolation and no advice, but sympathy at a time of the year when family is so central so so many people's life.

I lost my daughter in 2021. My grandsons and son-in-law have estranged me. My daughter and I were very close throughout her life. Her husband traveled a lot and left her to most of the housework, parenting along with her own full time job working with troubled teens.she eventually turned to heavy alcohol use, had 3 concussions from car accidents and was never the same, eventually turning against everyone and suffering cardiac arrest in her bathtub. Her husband kept me away and to this day there is no connection. My son visits them when he comes to town. Spends more time with them than he does with me. I realize his rationale, yet feel such pain and hurt playing second fiddle. I don’t want to cause any dissension, however sometimes being ignored for no valid reason is very hurtful, especially at Christmas when we shared so much love for so many years. Advice?

I am making the best of it and definitely will not be granny in the corner. Everything changes when we are widowed and alone. I am having a day at a time with DDs but they too need their own time as family and I choose to come home, to my own bed

Best always to go with the flow and not live in the past. I can escape to my new allotment plot, I did today for an hour, then back for lunch, followed by knitting and Marie Antoinette on iplayer. Being out gives me the uplift that makes me happy for the rest of the day

I am stress-free and living my normal life

grandMattie

I’m going to DD’s for the 4th year and am feeling redundant.

No longer making anything from gingerbread houses to the full Christmas meal. I appear gracious and grateful but underneath feel hurt and useless.

Oh madeleine - poor you. I hope that things improve soon.
And KG1241, you may be due the most exciting Christmas ever!
The family are here from far and wide and
my most proud Christmas prep is done - I've cleaned the oven...yay.

Madeleine 45, so sorry all this happened to you, yet, you sound so cheery. I do hope things get better, Merry Christmas.

Well folks I will tell you my little saga and so whatever you have forgotten or not done you are still way ahead of me. I like christmas and am usually very busy as I am a singer, So there are concerts , but what people forget is that concerts mean rehearsals too, so for every concert at this time there will have been numerous rehearsals especially the important last one before the concert, where there is intermible moving people around as well as the singing, as we adjust to heights of people, the sight lines in the church or concert hall, and the changes needed to deal with illness striking one part or another.
My great tip that I offer for a price, (if you use the idea please put 50p or £1 in the RNLI or cancer research box) So I make lists and am quite methodical, but there is always the possibility of forgetting someone , or more likely an extra unexpected person comes. I think there is nothing more cringing than to hear the sound of someone in the next room hastily wrapping something up for you. You are still aware that they did not already have something. So I buy a book token, put it in an envelope, DONT sign it or write on the envelope. I also buy something like Anton Berg 's what I consider"posh " jaffa cakes. They are chocolate covered with marzipan and then some liqueur in them, so could be Kirsh or Cognac etc. They are wrapped individually and then in the box. So I wrap the box neatly and then stick a label on the top, but dont sign it again Put them away in the cupboard as your emergency presents. So if they bring aunty Mary with them, you can choose which gift she gets. Diabetic? give her the book token . Poor eyesight - she gets the chocolates. All you need to do is quickly get them from the cupboard and write Love from or Best wishes or whatever is appropriate. Takes only a minute, you are not flustered, your guest feels remembered. Now if you have been terribly efficient, or not had any unexpected guests in january Hurrah! You have a book token to spend or chocolates to eat or both!! The book token is especially important as if you just put money in an envelope, you would feel obliged to pay bills with it. (when my son was very little he once said "Look , I've got a Boots Vulture" so we always have vultures in our house. If money is tight an alternative to the book token is to write your own personal voucher. Have they got a dog? Offer a long walk once a week for a month. Big garden ? An hours weeding each week for a month etc etc.
So why is this year different? Well 11 weeks ago , I came from my bedroom to the bathroom and the carpet in the hall was wet. Cut a long story short, it turned out that the pipe from the toilet was cracked and waste water had been leaking under the tiles for I dont know how long. The total bathroom had to be removed, sanitised, and a new bathroom installed. All the other rooms in the flat were full of things moved out of the way etc. The hall carpet had to go and all those prickly grip things got up etc. A major job including 3 weeks of the driers being going none stop. I live on the ground floor and have a very bad back, so if I go away I usually get ground floor. At this time all the hotels were fully booked and the only place I could go was very old and listed and only stairs. The staff were lovely and as helpful as they could be but their rooms had of course been booked months in advance, so it meant that I was like the nomad guest. I would be in one room with walk in shower etc, but that would have been booked for the weekend and so I had to pack up and move to another room!! My plumber was lovely and worked extremely hard but had to wait for the drier to finish etc and so I only came home this friday. So now have lovely new bathroom, but no hall carpet, nothing whatsoever done for christmas, couldnt even have my christmas card list as it was quite dangerous as well with the bathroom being quite small there was stuff in the hall and things moved out of the way into other rooms. So at least I can sit in my chair, and listen to radio 3, they have made a space for me to get to my bed, and I can use the kitchen. BUT, put the washer through a cleaning cycle as it had stood empty with door closed all this time. Now the door will not open , have tried every combination, so will have to wait until after christmas , the tv has developed a fault where every so often the picture fractures or the speech is cut of in bits of time, and I am surrounded by such chaos I cant find things. Couldnt go to visit my son as my daughter in law and grandson have covid. I have cancer so cannot risk going there. So eventually everyone will be getting a New Years letter or email to bring them up to date, I have been out to get the flat stocked up but much more basics like shoe polish and bread. But I have been smiling at everyone and thanking them for their help. I managed to go to a carol concert on sunday and today I shall be listening to radio 3 and 4, singing along. shant be making any mince pies and my christmas dinner is going to be lamb, roast potatoes,onion, and parsnips with peas and mint sauce of course and gravy. It has been a hard time and I am so happy to at least be home. The hotel had told me that on friday they just had no beds at all . It was totally full. I did ask if they had a stable at the back, like other inns! There is a precedent for staying in one isnt there? But they didnt have anywhere!So I wish you all a good christmas and that you can be in touch with people you love and may you all have a peaceful and healthy new year.

fancythat

I have guests until 4th Jan. Continuous. One group leaves after Christmas and another arrives.
17 for Christmas Day lunch.
I dont like to think too much about what it all entails. Best that way!

17!,!,😱

Presents all bought and wrapped, food shopping done today just need to pick up bagels in the morning. More excitingly my DD is 2 days overdue with her first baby! We’re all just waiting.

Not a fan of the festive season. I go through the motions, tree and minimal decs; turkey; Christmas pud; visit from wider family. Keep a low profile so as not to spoil anyone else's fun and hunker down until its over. I love my everyday life and am so blessed to have wonderful volunteering and U3A. Cant wait for normality to return.

Despite having had horrible side effects from a new prescription of Statins for the past few weeks, I am done. All presents wrapped (bar two), tree x 2 decorated and other bits and pieces put up. House cleaned, beds ready for guests, just some cooking to do tomorrow and then having a house full on the Day. So looking forward to it. I really enjoy Christmas. Aldi this am wasn't too bad but Sainsburys was manic. Yo ho ho Merry Christmas. :-)

I have 4 adults and two little ones to cook for on Christmas Day. Just the turkey crown to collect tmrw morning early.
I long for the day though when someone will cook me a Christmas dinner, not had one done for me since my mum cooked it many years ago😂😂 I have a lot to be thankful for though.
Merry Christmas to all🎅⭐️🎄x

No panic. Just arrived in Sydney with DD3 and her family to stay with DD2 and hers. 12 in all. No room in luggage for presents so have just ‘wrapped’ a load of $ for each of the grandchildren. They’ll be happy. Off to see Elf today, Christmas Eve, at the Opera House then let it all begin 🎅🏼 🍤 🎁 🥂⛱️
🌞

I’m going to DD’s for the 4th year and am feeling redundant.

No longer making anything from gingerbread houses to the full Christmas meal. I appear gracious and grateful but underneath feel hurt and useless.

Jaxjacky

I was in the local farm shop at 7 Witzend for veg, i do it every year, it’s quite magical in the dark, little traffic, Christmas lights and sprout stalks!
Cooking gammon later, turkey in the fridge defrosting, Asda delivering this afternoon.

We’ve gone at the same time, same day, for the turkey in previous years, and it’s been much busier, even so early. We didn’t even have to queue to pay!

One year I queued behind a woman with a massive trolley full - absolutely everything for Christmas dinner - from turkey to roast potatoes, all veg, gravy and custard, stuffing and side dishes, all pre prepared, ready to go.

Needless to say, her bill was eye watering! (yes of course I looked!)

My wonderful, beautiful family have arrived ( just some of them ,that is )
8 adults, 4 kids and 5 dogs.
Love them all , love having them but I just wish the various pooches will stop trying to out do each in how often, and where exactly, they can all pee in the house.
None of them do this normally but there seems to be a competition going on !
Hope my house doesn't stink by 1st January!
Roll on 2025 !!!

Sorted, I buy throughout the year, always have. Cannot be bothered with manic shopping, shoppers and eejit drivers!

Getting ready to drive to Nottingham tomorrow sporting a very black eye after a nasty fall on Saturday. No alcohol involved. New glasses required as they were demolished in the fall !! £315 to fork out 🤬
Daughter done it all I just sent her money. Going for tapas meal tomorrow night which OH is treating us to as his “ contribution “ he has done nothing else, easy option but happy to be fed! Just looking forward to park run on Saturday 2h3n life gets back to normal .
Happy Christmas to you all !

Every year I just long for it to get over. So
MUCH hassle for SO little reward

I was in my local M&S food hall this morning, very long queues. The lady in front of me had a massive trolley full. When it came to pay her £320 bill. She didn’t have her sparks card with her so offered her rewards to me, the checkout operator said it was fine.
After she’d gone the checkout operator said the lady had had an operation yesterday and signed herself out of hospital this morning to get her shopping !
If your in here reading this I do hope your okay. 🤞

I was in the local farm shop at 7 Witzend for veg, i do it every year, it’s quite magical in the dark, little traffic, Christmas lights and sprout stalks!
Cooking gammon later, turkey in the fridge defrosting, Asda delivering this afternoon.